What I did during Summer Break
by lotus-genie
Summary: Ultra Magnus goes through the hell that is training. Only he's not the one being trained...
1. Roadtrip

_I do not own Transformers. Hasbro, Takara, and Marvel have the rights. Please just enjoy this story. All of the cadets featured in this story are my original characters, but anyone can use them in their fanfic. This is my first story, so ideas for later chapters and/or constructive criticism is appreciated._

It was early morning in the deserts of Nevada. Two large, female robots, looking as if they were only thirteen years of age, stood next to each other, conversing.

"So, who do you think our instructor will be this year?" One of the girls asked. She was purple in color, and somewhat stockier than her friend. Her optics were fuchsia, but if light refracted of them at certain angles, they could seem red or purple. Long black wires poked out of her head, resembling some sort of synthetic hair. They were actually radar and sonar receivers, but no one gave much thought to it. A large shell surrounded her body, ready to shield her from damage. A sword hilt pointed out of her hip, making the weapon easy to draw in case of an attack. A rather big bazooka was latched on her back. Undoubtedly, she was stronger than she looked.

"I bet that it probably won't be Tracks. Not after we went too far with the 'bug juice' prank, anyway." The other girl replied. She was white and pale yellow, with red accents on her hands and feet. Her optics were electric blue, and they seemed to be burning with a cool, calculated passion. Her corn-stalk colored hair was purely decorative, and gave her a feminine edge. The most awesome appendages on her were her wings, which where thin and sleek. One could detach and become a sword, a feature found on most of the newer plane models. Two blasters were connected on her arms, and they could pack a punch, despite their small size.

"Cut me some slack, Windshear, he was the one who overreacted and threw a hissy fit!"

"He had every right to angry, Oceancruiser. If I'm correct, his entire left side was paralyzed." Windshear desperately attempted to keep a serious face on, but it was hard when she remembered the humorous scene.

"Well, he just had to get so mad that he ran around and impaled himself, and that made things worse. We had to carry him home!" Oceancruiser protested.

"Yes, Prime was so worried that we had been ambushed. Then he went ahead and gave us a two-hour long angry speech when he realized it was just a prank." By this time, Windshear could no longer restrain herself and smiled. The cadets had taken turns carrying their instructor, but even that was not enough. Tracks had been dropped a total of five times on the trip, two of the times from dangerous heights. The second time, swift responses had let the cadets break their instructor's fall just in time. The first time, however, everyone had been so shocked that they just let Tracks drop and make a thirty-foot deep, robot-shaped hole in the ground. As expected, the corvette was hurling threats and complaints as they fished him out. Then, they had returned to the base, causing an unnecessary stir when the senior officers saw their injuries. Red Alert had jumped to the conclusion that there was a Decepticon attack, and that had sent the whole base into a paranoid state. When the cadets finally explained their situation, they were given a severe reprimand, and the whole affair died down.

The two girls tuned their audios when the realized that something was coming. They did not need to listen for more than five seconds before they realized that it was their teammate Fastlane, and they stepped out of the way for him to streak through.

"Hello, ladies, do you have an idea about whom, or where, our instructor is? I'm hyped about this trip." Fastlane was a midnight-blue race car. His optics were pale cerulean, and they glowed with a desultory light. His entire body seemed to be quaking with nervous energy. Two sniper rifles seemed to be loosely clamped around his waist, and it was a wonder that they did not fall off. Large wheels were attached to his arms and legs, as well as a pair of skates that helped increase his speed when he was running. He was rather tall for a cadet, and towered above the girls. His car form, however, was rather fragile, and there he seemed to give off the impression that he traded strength for speed.

"Fastlane, he, or she, is not here yet, so just be patient."

"Patient, I'm already being patient. I can't be patient any longer! I want to do something!" Fastlane complained, pacing a hole into the ground.

"Hello, I hope I wasn't interrupting." A pink hippie van arrived on the scene. It was painted with yellow and red flowers, as well as rainbow words that read "Flower Power!"

"Glad to see you here, Flower Wagon!" Oceancruiser greeted.

"I'm glad to be here, Oceancruiser. Now that we're here, let's sing to pass the time." Flower Wagon transformed to robot mode and took out a banjo. He was shorter than both Windshear and Oceancruiser, but he was heavily armored. The same flowers painted on his car mode were still present, as was the letters, but now there was also a peace sign on his chest. His optics were an odd shade of burgundy, seeming opaque and transparent at the same time. He had several psychedelic trinkets hanging around, and his air freshener smelled like pine trees. The only weapon he was armed with was a stun gun, which he always fired with painful accuracy, but only as a last resort.

"So, what is it this time, the Beatles, or the Rolling Stones?" Fastlane cracked.

"Actually, it's Joni Mitchell."

As Flower Wagon's 60's music washed over them, the four cadets got an urge to just dance and let loose. It was this scene that Nightscream saw as he arrived.

"Sister, what are you doing?" Nightscream inquired. He was a red-and-white fighter jet, who looked like a younger version of Starscream. That was expected, since Nightscream was Starscream's clone. He had been created in a Decepticon laboratory to research Starscream's immortal spark. However, in a chaotic event that even Nightscream couldn't remember, the lab was destroyed and he was left wandering the slums of Cybertron with no memories at all. To discover who he really was, he had joined the Decepticons, only to have his mind wiped further and treated like an over-powered drone. Oceancruiser had rescued him and adopted him as her little brother, so they stuck extremely close to each other.

"Don't talk. Just feel the groove." Flower Wagon suggested.

A few minutes later, Flower Wagon had ran out of music, and everyone was bored. Fastlane had transformed into car mode and drove around in circles, but stopped when Nightscream fell on him.

"Dude, get off!" Fastlane snapped.

"Well, it isn't my fault that you ran into me! Watch what you're doing." Nightscream retorted.

"Guys, cool it. Let go of this aggression. It's not good for you." Flower Wagon advised, only to receive two angry glares.

"Boys, please don't fight." Another you female pleaded. She was the shortest out of the cadets. She was cool gray and black, making her colors resemble a storm cloud. Her optics were a dark ocean-gray, looking like she had wisdom beyond her years. She held several flower pots in on hand and a tranquilizer in the other. Two missile launchers were secured on her back, but seemed to be unused. A face mask covered her face below the eyes, obscuring her features. She gave off a slightly sad, secluded air. Her shoulders seemed to be more stylized than the other girls.

"Yes, just take deep breaths and apologize to each other. This works better than fighting." Flower Wagon agreed.

"I agree, when you get angry, it damages your relationship." Windshear chimed in.

With a snort, the boys broke it off and refused to talk anymore. Their awkward silence, however, was broken by the arrival of two new cadets.

The first robot was silver and turquoise in color. His teal optics were wide with curiosity. He did not seem to carry many weapons, but he did hold an emergency medical kit. He was shorter than Fastlane but taller than Windshear. A shark-like fin stuck up from his head. His body was sleek and streamlined, with a shell on the back. Unlike Oceancruiser, his shell was thinner, and it stuck out toward the sides, resembling wings. Despite his overall high-speed, design, he was stronger than some of his peers. A fox was resting on his shoulder, probably considering it a good shelter. At the sight of the other robots, he scampered away.

The other robot was a vivid blue. He had a purple optic visor instead of separate optics, making it a little hard to decipher his emotions. His shoulder pads shot straight up in the air instead of lying back. Two tiny horns poked out of his head, although none of the other Autobots knew their function. His only weapon was a portable, super-powered arc-welder, which he carried on his back. He was twitching nervously, as if going through some sort of withdrawal. "Um, do you have any technology?"

"We have our guns and a datatpad."

"Could I have them for a minute?" The cadets shrugged and handed their weapons to the azure robot, who bean to disassemble and reassemble them, sighing with relief.

"I still can't believe that you're addicted to technology, or your fear of open spaces. I was hoping that it would wear off, Cobalt." The silver robot commented.

"I'm only afraid of open spaces when I'm alone and I have no technology, Torpedo." Cobalt protested.

"Okay, but you should try to get used to being outside. After all, we are going training."

"Don't remind me. I'm still trying to block out last year's memories."

"Why would you want to block them out? We got to see two mountain lions rip each other to pieces! Now, that's what I call a good death!" A black hearse declared, transforming into robot mode. He had one bottle green optic band, but two separate optic ridges. He was somewhere around Fastlane's height, making him the tallest one there. He had a red forehead decoration, which looked like horns. There was a cartoon skull painted on his chest instead of an insignia. Two acid guns perched on his arms, which were accented with crimson. One side of his face was white, but the other half was gray.

"Only you would enjoy that." Torpedo muttered.

"No, Nightscream and I actually found it fascinating. All the blood was splattering everywhere and they kept on going. It was like they were on Energizer batteries or something!" Oceancruiser shouted in excitement. "One of them just sucked out their opponent's eyeball. It was so **cool**!"

'Yeah, and when they were done, we got to cleave their bodies open and see their anatomy!"

Flower Wagon frowned. The fight between the mountain lions was gruesome chapter that should not have happened. All he could feel was sadness for the deaths and pity for the fact that the cougars had not attempted any other methods. Yet here were all of his friends, intrigued by the morbid event.

"So, what's going on?" A female robot walked up toward Flower Wagon. She was red and yellow in color. Her optics were lilac, and she had russet, decorative hair, which she pulled up into a pony tail. She was average height for a female, so she was only a little taller than Oceancruiser. She was also the most full-figured out of the girls. Her wheels were tied around her waist, with two holsters for the guns. Her most significant weapon was a red shield taller than her body.

"They've started a conversation about the mountain lion incident. Nightscream, Oceancruiser, and Crosscut are proclaiming their support of it being the most interesting part of the trip. Cobalt and I just want to forget it as soon as possible," Flower Wagon explained, a wave of disgust sweeping through him.

Flower Wagon suddenly let out a shriek when he felt a hand on his shoulder. A dark emerald and wine colored female had suddenly appeared. She was tall and thin, with ice blue optics that stared at him frigidly. Twin propellers were attached to her ankles. Two cannons were mounted on her shoulders. A red colored jewel was in the middle of her forehead, giving her a mystical quality. Despite the strange conversation going on around her, she did not seem to be confused and stood by silently.

"There you are! What are you planning this time? I don't trust you." An angry female stormed in. She was ruby with black and ginger accents. Two alarms attached to her audios were flashing red. Her navy optics were narrowed in anger and fear. She had a machine gun in her hand, and she was aiming it at the other cadets. She was Double-header's height, but had a stronger build. She had long, fake nails attached to her fingers, and they reflected the light almost painfully.

"Blackout, I'm not a spy anymore. You can put the gun down before you hurt anyone." The emerald colored female stated.

"Fine, but I'm watching you." Blackout growled. "I don't know when, I don't know how, but you're going to blow your cover, Iceberg. And when you do, I'll be waiting"

"Wait then. I don't give a nanobyte. It's just your time that is getting wasted."

The cadets were just about to become involved in serious combat when a car carrier drove up and transformed into Ultra Magnus.

"All right, you maggots, listen up! You will get into a single file line and board me in an orderly fashion! You will not cause a racket while we are on the road! When we arrive at our location, you will file off in a disciplined manner! Am I understood?" Ultra Magnus bellowed to the cadets.

"Cool down, it's not good to yell." Flower wagon proposed.

"Yeah, give us some respect." Fastlane whined.

"I know you're taking us there, but who's our instructor?" Oceancruiser scratched her head in curiosity.

"I **am** the instructor!" Ultra Magnus snapped.

"Well, if you're our instructor, who's watching Autobot City?" Cobalt asked.

"I am temporarily relieved of my duties to supervise your training. Springer, Hot Rod, and Arcee will substitute for me in my absence." Ultra Magnus growled in frustration. They had not even departed from the base, and the cadets were already driving him nuts. His only consolation was that Nightracer had not yet reached the age requirement to go on training. The one thing that could be worse than an annoying cadet was an annoying cadet who was also your biggest fan.

Grumbling a bit about the cramped storage area, the cadets squeezed into the carrier portion of Ultra Magnus and waited for him to take off

After driving for an hour or so on the road, the cadets had gotten terribly bored. Fastlane, especially, was unable to keep quiet any longer.

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"What about now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"No."

"Are we—?"

"Shut up, Fastlane!" Windshear shrieked, saving Ultra Magnus the time and effort. "Fastlane, if you utter one more sound vaguely resembling 'Are we there yet,' I will make you regret ever having a vocalizer!"

This threat scared Fastlane to the point that he clamped up immediately. Ultra Magnus silently thanked the heavens that at least one cadet retained a degree of sanity. The rest of the cadets also remained quiet in lieu of Windshear's threats.

"This is getting boring: we need music." Flower Wagon cautiously suggested. "Can we play music?"

"Yes, as long as it is not something that makes me wish to drive off the nearest cliff. You have the permission to play it, but only if it is tolerable." Ultra Magnus replied. It would be better to compromise with them than to insist on silence, or they would be even more annoying.

Flower Wagon turned on his car stereo. "Everybody wants to be a cat…"

"Everybody, everybody! Everybody wants to be a cat! Everybody, everybody…" They cadets were bellowing the lyrics, sometimes on tune, and at other times off tune.

Ultra Magnus inwardly groaned. Although he did not feel like driving off the closest cliff yet, he was ready to drive into the nearest pothole just to give the cadets something to do other than sing. Unfortunately, his wish came true at that moment, and he fell into a giant pothole in the middle of the road.

The cadets stopped singing when they were suddenly tipped over. Crosscut, being the first one to untangle himself from the pile, climbed out and started helping Ultra Magnus climb out of the hole. Oceancruiser and Torpedo also ran out to help.

"Push, Crosscut, push! He's almost out."

With a mighty heave, the cadets were finally able to thrust Ultra Magnus out of the pothole. They climbed on, glad that it was over. Ultra Magnus began driving once again, this time not subject to Flower Wagon's juvenile music.

They had not traveled for half an hour before Crosscut yelled. "I have to go!"

Ultra Magnus screeched to a stop. "Go right here."

"But there's nothing to hide behind."

Ultra Magnus transformed into robot mode and stared Crosscut right in the optic. "Listen, cadet, when you're in the middle of a battle, you have to hold it in and keep on fighting, or you have to go behind the nearest object and not give a damn about who accidentally sees you! If you can't do that, you're as good as deactivated."

"Okay, I get it, but could everyone shut their optics?"

Everybody shut their optics and turned around to around to allow Crosscut to perform his bodily functions. Ultra Magnus felt something wet hit his leg, but dismissed it as imagination.

"I'm done!"

Ultra Magnus glanced down and realized that his worst fears had been confirmed: Crosscut had used his leg as the nearest object. A large black oil stain, slowly getting bigger, surrounded his foot.

The cadets re-boarded Ultra Magnus and took off. Less than a half hour later, however, Double-header yelled the same thing Crosscut did. "I have to go!"

"Why did you not go before?"

"It hadn't come down then."

Once again, Ultra Magnus stopped. Thankfully, the surrounding area had many huge stones, and Double-header was able to cover herself with one of those.

Ten minutes passed, and Double-header still did not come out. The rest of the cadets felt worried and Ultra Magnus just felt annoyed.

"Cadet, why have you still not come out?"

"I'm done, but I can't find anything to wipe with!" Double-header protested from her position.

Ultra Magnus slapped his forehead. "Cadet, on the battlefield, you can't afford to waste time wiping. If you really have to do it, use whatever's handy!"

"But I don't have anything around" Double-header whined.

"Cadet, I don't care if you have to wipe with your shield! Clean yourself off and stop wasting time!"

Double-header grumbled something unintelligible. A few seconds later, she ran out from behind the rock.

"What did you use?" Oceancruiser asked, seemingly fascinated by the subject.

"I used some leaves, but it was still gross."

A half hour after Magnus had departed once again, Cobalt and Torpedo decided to declare that due to their breakfast being thoroughly digested, a certain bodily function of theirs had to be performed. This was, of course just a nice way to say: "I have to go!"

Magnus screeched to a stop. "That's it! Everyone, get off now!"

"Geeze, he's got a temper." Fastlane muttered.

"If you have to go to the restroom, nod! If you don't, shake your head! But I warn you—don't decide too soon, because there will be no more pit stops! If you have ingested anything that has not yet made its way through your system, then go! Either go here or hold it in for the rest of the trip!"

"What if it hasn't come down yet?" Nightscream inquired meekly.

"Then force it down! I don't care if you have to shove your sword up your tailpipe and pick it out, piece by piece! Just excrete it and don't whine for the rest of this journey!"

Nightscream growled, but nevertheless took cover behind a tree to do his business. Ultra Magnus stood with his back toward the trainees, impatiently waiting for them to finish.

After the cadets were finished, they took off yet again. One hour later, everything was okay. Two hours later, Ultra Magnus felt like he needed to go to the restroom, but held it in due to the fact he had loudly declared that there would be no more pit stops. After a half hour more, he could restrain it no longer and braked.

"Everyone out! About face and march thirty feet! Shut your optics and do not move until I give you the order!"

The cadets took one look at their squirming instructor and decide to follow his orders. They walked thirty feet away and stood there, snickering.

"What happened to 'there will be no more pit stops'?" Fastlane smirked

"Yeah, wanna tease him after he's done?" Oceancruiser posed a question, a devious grin plastered on her face.

"I don't know, you can't really control your bodily functions, so we should be more considerate." Double-header frowned.

"Come on, Dub, he didn't give one bag of dog dropping's worth of consideration to our bodily functions, so why should we give any to his? I say, tease him for all we've got!" Oceancruiser exclaimed.

After the party had gotten on the road again, the cadets began to plague Ultra Magnus with questions about his embarrassing experience.

"So, Magnus, did you have to pick it out, piece by piece?" Nightscream asked eagerly.

"What did it feel like, having to make an exception for yourself?" Fastlane chimed in.

"I wonder if anyone peeped." Oceancruiser thought at loud.

"I did." Iceberg stated.

"You're kidding! Did you see his thingy?" Blackout temporarily forgot her rivalry with Iceberg in light of a common enemy.

"No, I am not kidding, but I did not see his thingy—all I saw was a giant oil stain."

"I feel sorry for any car that has the misfortune to slip in it." Blackout cracked, sending everyone into fits of giggling except Ultra Magnus. He now wished he could just disappear and not endure this anymore.

For some reason Ultra Magnus' luck was doomed to get worse. After taking a lengthy restroom break and then giggling, the cadets had used up much of their energy. Now, they felt like declaring their situation to Magnus and demanding that he find them fuel.

"There's a gas station just ahead. Go refuel there."

"No way. Remote roadside gas stations are known for serving bad gas" Cobalt objected.

"Even if the gas was good, I can't use it because Nightscream and I can only run on jet fuel. We jets have delicate anatomies, you know." Windshear also voiced her disagreement for Magnus' idea.

"I don't know about the sort of anatomy ships have, but I don't think we were designed to consume car gas." Oceancruiser speculated.

"What do you suggest we do then" Ultra Magnus was barely restraining his urge to scream now.

"We could get beer." Oceancruiser proposed.

'Oceancruiser, if you are attempting to get drunk, then forget it!" Windshear grabbed her friend angrily.

"No, I mean we could get alcohol to fill our tanks with. Alcohol is actually one of the most efficient and environmentally-friendly fuels on the planet." Oceancruiser explained.

"Actually, she's correct. All of our bodies will probably be able to handle alcohol with no problems, and it will give us enough energy to last until we reach the campsite." Cobalt confirmed Oceancruiser's theory.

Windshear slowly loosened her grip. "Well, it seems you've done your homework for once."

Oceancruiser peered into the door of the convenience store with one optic. "Hi, can I have the most alcoholic drink in your shop?"

The storekeeper raised an eyebrow. "How many cases do you want?"

"Enough to fill my tank, and the tanks of my friends."

"Can I see your ID?" the storekeeper droned.

"I don't need an ID! I'm three hundred twenty-eight years old! Surely that's old enough to buy alcohol!"

"Do you have proof?"

"Proof? What makes you think I have proof? I don't have no proof. I don't need no proof. My gun should be enough proof!" Oceancruiser was getting impatient.

"I'm looking at a robot who seems to be only thirteen years of age attempting to buy a drink that only people twenty-one years old can buy. If you threaten me, I will call police."

Oceancruiser swerved around and looked behind her. "Magnus, this guy won't sell me alcohol!"

Ultra Magnus walked up and loomed over the shop. "Is there a problem?" Behind him, Fastlane was striking funny poses with his gun.

Whether it was the sight of guns, or the sheer size of Ultra Magnus, the storekeeper changed his mind and brought out all the alcohol in his shop. In the stack was rubbing alcohol, tequila, vodka, beer, and other liquors of all kinds. The Autobots didn't care and filled their tanks to the brim with the liquid. When they finished, they stepped back and surveyed their waste bottles.

"We'll pay extra if you clean up this mess." Ultra Magnus suggested, handing the storekeeper some extra bills.

Two minute after the cadets had gotten on the road again, they fell asleep. Ultra Magnus could only sigh in relief. If they had been awake for any longer, he would rather have had his CPU slowly sucked out of his head through his audios.

A space saucer randomly landed in the middle of the road. A troop of little aliens stepped out, holding straws.

"Hi, may we slowly suck your brain out via your ears?"

"No." Ultra Magnus hit the saucer, knocking it back into orbit.

"But you said we could…"

"I changed my mind."

It was eight o'clock at night when the cadets finally reached the cabin. Ultra Magnus transformed into robot mode and threw them all off, giving them a rude awakening. The cadets grumbled a little bit, but at this point, they were so tired that they didn't care.

When they threw open the doors of the cabin, they were horrified by the sight before them. Everything was strewn on the floor. The bed sheets were lifted up and sullied. There was a rotten energon pizza on Fastlane's bed and a broken TV on Oceancruiser's.

Ultra Magnus swept his optics across the room before issuing an order: "Get the cleaning supplies!"

The cadets scrambled to the closet to retrieve the items, but found themselves buried by junk when they opened the door. Nevertheless, they were able to gather the utensils and report back.

"Atten-hut! Present arms!"

The cadets fumbled a bit, but still managed to perform a perfect present-arms with their brooms, mops, detergent, and other supplies. Ultra Magnus marched over and inspected their posture.

"You will be divided into teams and given a certain area to clean! You will not sleep until each and every group completes their task and reports back to me! And when you're done, I want that floor to be so clean you can slurp energon off of it. Is that clear?"

"Sir, yes sir!'

"Ugh…my arms feel like they've fallen off. Actually, they feel worse because they're still attached..." Oceancruiser collapsed on her bed. She had been assigned to clean the walls, and even both her arms, moving at their maximum speed, were not fast enough. Worst of all, she had to do the inside and outside of both cabins, but she was so tired she had almost fallen asleep many times.

Fastlane had already fallen asleep. He and his partner had attempted to have all the fun they could on the cleaning mission. Oceancruiser had assaulted the wall with her martial arts talent like it was her new worst enemy and Fastlane had attached the brushes onto his feet and pretended he was skating. However, fun did not mean "not tired," and the two, in their excitement, had worn themselves out.

Windshear was in so much pain she could not even speak, lest she screeched like a banshee. She and Nightscream had been assigned to cleaning windows, and found themselves hovering for four hours, craning their bodies to get to the obscure places. Her wings and rockets felt like they were falling off. At least in plane mode, the body structure was fit for gliding.

Nightscream also felt that his body was one mass of ache, but he did not object. Back in the Decepticon camps, he had done this sort of thing all too often. Besides, his sister was in pain her self, and he did not wish to worry her about his exhaustion from a relatively easy task, even if the windows had been hard to find because of the graffiti coating them.

Pallas and Flower Wagon's mission had, at first, caused the envy of all the cadets. They had been assigned to the cafeteria, which, despite the name of "mess hall," was actually the cleanest place around. However, jealousy quickly became sympathy when the others learned that in addition to cleaning, the two had to restock all of the energon booths.

'My back…" was the only thing that the two could groan.

Double-header, Crosscut, Cobalt, and Torpedo were the unlucky ones assigned to clean the restrooms. The cadets all suspected that the four were only condemned to this because they had been the ones needing to go to the restroom on the trip. When they had returned, they refused to talk, although the others noted a strange stench entering the room.

Blackout and Iceberg had been assigned to pick up and organize the scattered objects. Right in the middle of cleaning, Blackout had declared that the room was bugged, and insisted that Iceberg lift her into the vents to check. However, she had managed to get her upper body stuck in the airshaft, with no hidden recorders or cameras in sight. She had called for help, but Magnus had coolly responded that she might as well as clean the shafts. So there Blackout remained, wiping the ventilation, until Oceancruiser buttered her sides and had Iceberg yank her down.

Despite everything that happened, the worst part of the evening had been Ultra Magnus' word to the cadets after they were done with their work. Those words still sent shivers down their backs as they remembered them.

"Tomorrow, the real work begins."


	2. Training

_I'm sorry that this chapter is bad. I was running out of ideas. Anyway, the training has started and Magnus is in for a long day._

In the wee hours of morning, a bird merrily chirped out its song, only to be crushed by a gigantic alarm clock, obviously thrown with impressive force. Double-header's head appeared at the window minutes later.

"Shut up, you dumb birds!" She screeched, closing the window with a bang.

A few minutes after the occurrence, "Reveille" began playing. However, it was not sure if you could call this version an accurate presentation of the army music composition. It was so scratchy and mangled, with so many places that went fast and slow or high-pitched and low-pitched that it would be better to say it sounded like farm animals uttering their dying screams. The cadets only buried their heads closer into their pillow and hoped that if they ignored it, the bad music would go away.

Finally, Windshear, Torpedo, and Double-header dragged themselves out of bed because they had a sense of responsibility. Iceberg and Nightscream rose a few seconds later, silently strolling out. This alerted Blackout and she sprang up, hurling accusations left and right. She finally ending it by shooting an innocent chair, which she thought was staring at her. Afterwards, Flower Wagon and Pallas awoke because they were hungry, and they could not sleep after the noise that Blackout made. Oceancruiser, Fastlane, Crosscut, and Cobalt, however, seemed to be asserting their right to sleep late. Despite all attempts to awaken them, they refused to get up.

Ultra Magnus stormed into the cabins, infuriated by the tardiness of said cadets. He stomped right over to the four sleeping ones and practically screamed in their ears. "Get up now, you lazy little glitches! Time isn't slowing down, so by the time I count to three, you better get up—or else! One…two…three!"

When the cadets still exercised their right to sleep in and refused to budge, they found their right violated by Ultra Magnus, who yanked off their covers with a roar. Fastlane, Cobalt, and Crosscut bolted up, but Oceancruiser just hugged her blankets closer. When Ultra Magnus tried to snatch away her covers, she hung on tight, causing them to engage in a tug-of-war.

"That's it! I have lost all my patience! Get up or face the consequences!" With one mighty yank, Oceancruiser's covers gave way, and Magnus threw them off. Only after Oceancruiser looked up did he realize that it was a mistake to wake up an irritated, sleepy cadet who knew martial arts. Oceancruiser, who was not only grouchy, but also confused, threw Ultra Magnus out of the cabin and into the forest with one punch. Then, she just went right back to sleep.

"Go, go, go! Get those legs pumping! You're running for your lives!" Ultra Magnus barked. After Oceancruiser had cleared her head enough, she apologized and the training had gone as scheduled. However, being thrown into a lake in the forest by one punch was not a good way to start a day, and Ultra Magnus was fully prepared for anything that might go wrong.

Fastlane, being a racecar, led the cadets around the laps. Oceancruiser was a close second, with Windshear and Blackout fighting for third. Nightscream, Flower Wagon, Pallas, Cobalt, Torpedo, and Double-header lagged a bit behind, but still had decent speeds. Crosscut and Iceberg brought up the rear, trotting at a leisurely pace.

"Hurry up! My grandmother unit could go faster!" Ultra Magnus spotted the two toward the back. "You two! You're running laps, not taking a stroll."

"Well, something bad could happen if I run. If there was a rock sticking up and I tripped, I could impale myself!" Crosscut snapped.

"There are no rocks, cadet."

"Well, maybe something worse," Crosscut muttered as he ran.

"What's your excuse?" Magnus turned to Iceberg.

"I feel the waves of this place. Something is wrong. If we run, we will be in a horrible accident. I feel it…"

Magnus slapped his forehead. "Cadet, run before I give you a reason to!"

"I doubt you could." Iceberg kept on going at her own pace, although she did walk a bit faster.

True to Iceberg's words, something bad did happen. Fastlane tripped over a rock and that caused a domino effect. All of the cadets, except Iceberg, were in a tangled dog pile, desperately flailing.

Ultra Magnus stepped over and tried to untangle the cadets, but they turned on him in their confusion. He was slapped, bitten, kicked, and assaulted in many other ways until Torpedo freed himself and called for the others to calm down.

The next training exercise was target practice. All the cadets whipped out their guns and aimed at the target dummies.

"All right, on my mark…fire!"

Twelve trigger were clicked. Four guns jammed and refused to fire. Eight guns fired, but missed the target. Five of those guns had such a large misfire that the shots headed toward Ultra Magnus. He was barely able to dodge those shots, which whizzed past him and headed into the forest. Just as Magnus let down his guard, however, a second volley of gunfire flew at him, to the shock of the owners of said guns. This time, he was not so lucky and was struck by all five blasts.

All of the cadets felt their paint curdle when Ultra Magnus hit the ground, thrown backwards by the shock of the blasts. They were relived when their instructor got up, undamaged except for a few scratches. Relief turned to annoyance when they checked their weapons and realized that the faulty operation was all thanks to Cobalt's tinkering. Instantly, the training ground became a sea of noise as the cadets angrily argued about whose fault it truly was that this debacle had occurred.

"Silence!" Ultra Magnus roared when the noise finally got too out of hand. All of the cadets stopped their bickering except for Cobalt and Fastlane. These two seemed so engrossed in their own conflict that they were oblivious to their surroundings.

"This is all your fault, Cobalt! You tweaked my weapon!"

"Yes, I will accept responsibility, but not fully, since it was partly your fault."

"How can it be my fault? My gun had such a huge misfire range!"

"It was partially due to your defective aim!"

"Are you saying I can't handle my gun?"

"No, I'm saying you did not do your best in aiming it."

"I've been firing this thing ever since I was in the Academy, don't tell me how to handle it! Besides, you made everything worse by adding in that second volley!"

"I was just attempting to upgrade your gun so that if one volley misses, there will always be a backup volley."

"Well, that—!"

Ultra Magnus snatched the gun out of Fastlane's hands. "This gun is now confiscated. Do not let me hear you arguing about it again, or the consequences will be worse."

"Well, it was his fault." Fastlane muttered.

"You are both at fault here. Fastlane, you are supposed to be focused on battling the Decepticons, not instigating conflict among your teammates! Cobalt, you are forbidden to modify any machinery without my permission." Ultra Magnus issued his decision, and both the cadets fell into silence. "Each one of you will take an auto-gun, standard issue, and resume practice."

Right after Ultra Magnus had given the command, Oceancruiser had led the cadets into acquiring something that looked like auto-guns. When Ultra Magnus turned around, she pointed the barrel at him with a wicked grin.

"Surprise, Magnus!"

Ultra Magnus spun around, but it was already too late. The projectile fired from Oceancruiser's gun splattered in his face. "What in the pit?"

Another volley, this time from everyone, struck him in the face, chest, and legs. Before he could speak, Iceberg charged forward and fired two shots into Magnus' mouth. The substance slid down his throat, radiating fumes as it did so.

"Hey, Magnus, smile! You're on cadet firing range! Our paintball guns have no mercy." Fastlane cracked, aiming his shot so it caught Ultra Magnus directly on the skid plate.

"Yep, you're the target, and we always hit our targets" Blackout's shot hit him right between the eyes.

With naughty smirks on their faces, the cadets fell upon their instructor. Shots flew everywhere, hitting animate and in animate objects alike. Ultra Magnus, by this time, had overcome the initial shock. Now, also armed with a paintball gun, he threw himself at the cadets.

After the debacle that was target practice, the cadets had lunch. Their bodies were speckled with spots of paint here or there, but they looked as if they were having the time of their lives. Ultra Magnus, on the other hand, was rather irritated as he grabbed his energon cubes. The cadets did everything to restrain their laughter as he walked away, but Double-header had to release a chuckle.

"Is there something funny?" Magnus was now staring Double-header in the optic, which made her feel uneasy.

"Yes, sir, you look funny." Double-header winced, unsure about how Magnus would take it.

"How do I look funny, cadet?" Ultra Magnus was staring at Double-header so intensely that it seemed he was seeing right through her. Instead of responding, she just held up her shield. Magnus snatched it away and stared, in mute horror, at his own appearance. Bright splotches of paint decorated his body from the waist down. Two balls of pink paint were on either side of his head, and one large splatter was between his eyes. There was green on his elbows and purple on his shoulders. In short, Magnus had become something that a little kid might have scribbled if drunk.

The cadets were barely holding in peals of laughter while they stared at their instructor. Windshear had even turned her head to avoid losing her composure.

"If you need me, I'll be in the restrooms." Ultra Magnus turned and walked away with the few shards of his dignity still intact.

As soon as he had left, the cadets burst into laughter. They were rolling around, clutching their sides in pain due to laughing so hard.

"Did you see his face?"

"I bet he's not gonna come out for the rest of the day."

"Yeah, do you want to cut classes?"

"Okay."

After scrubbing for two whole hours, Ultra Magnus decided that the paint was not going to come off anytime soon, so he went out to get the cadets for the afternoon training. However, the cadets were conspicuously absent when he came out. Magnus hurled some expletives and then went off to find them.

As Ultra Magnus stepped out of the mess hall, he received an unpleasant surprise in the form of a bucket of ink. The substance had coated his optics, causing him to stumble into a gigantic hole. A datapad hovered down next to him.

"Ultra Magnus, we have cut class. Try to find us if you can. Hugs and kisses—Oceancruiser." The letter stated. Ultra Magnus ripped it into pieces and bolted up.

"If that's the way you want it, that's the way it'll be."

Oceancruiser giggled as she watched Ultra Magnus walk into her vicinity. The city commander was going to consider retirement when she got done with him. Quietly, she observed Ultra Magnus lifting up rocks and peeking behind bushes. Many of the places that he had inspected were too small for her to fit through, but he still checked anyway.

Oceancruiser slowly extended a fishing line until it hung right above Magnus' head. Then, she lowered the string carefully, cautious about alerting others to her whereabouts. The hook got closer and closer to Ultra Magnus' shoulder blades. Finally, it caught on, causing Magnus to jump in surprise. When he realized that it was a fishing hook, surprise turned to chagrin. He grabbed the hook and yanked with all his might, hoping to drag out a cadet. Oceancruiser, however, offered no resistance and allowed Magnus to do as he liked.

Ultra Magnus realized that something was wrong when no one had been on the other end of the line fighting his effort to get free. However, it was already too late. Raw sewage sprayed from a large hose wrapped around the redwood tree, soaking the doomed city commander. Gasping and sputtering, Magnus staggered into a slowly oscillating magnetic grid. Even though it did not hurt, it delivered enough shock to his system to tickle, and Ultra Magnus collapsed, laughing. Unfortunately, he collapsed into a hole filled with rabid skunks.

From her perch atop the tree, Oceancruiser was laughing hard enough to make he engine ache. She was so obsessed with laughing that she did not notice the tree branch snapping under her weight. With a deafening crack, Oceancruiser's roost broke, sending her tumbling into the hole alongside Magnus. A brief struggle ensued, and Ultra Magnus emerged victorious. Holding Oceancruiser under one arm, he set out to find the other cadets.

Fastlane was zigzagging around the trees when Ultra Magnus found him. Despite everything that Magnus yelled, Fastlane refused to stop. "I'll go back if you beat me in a race. Catch me if you can!" He taunted.

Ultra Magnus shoved Oceancruiser into his trailer and took off after the hyperactive cadet. At his highest speed, Magnus could probably catch Fastlane, but his size was a disadvantage, as the trees would be harder to avoid at high velocity. By the time he had managed to steer clear of the obstacles, Fastlane had a huge head-start.

Fastlane decided that the forest had too many trees and decided to return to the training grounds. He found properly paved roads much more to his taste. Just to spite Ultra Magnus, Fastlane decided to take a fast, but dangerous shortcut. Taking a sharp turn to the right, he zoomed onto the bank of a babbling brook situated at the bottom of a fairly deep chasm. There was one bridge, but it was too dilapidated to support a car.

"Wow, this looks like it'll fall down any second now." As if to support Fastlane's conclusion, the bridge cracked in half, and the side opposite to Fastlane plummeted into the gorge. "Okay…I guess I won't be taking this road again any time soon. But I can spit farther than this, so if I do sixty miles per hour, I can cross this bridge easily." Perhaps as a warning, the side closest to Fastlane also issued a small groan. "Better make it eighty-five..."

Fastlane backed up a bit and revved himself up. "Geronimo!" He screamed as flew over the gap. He was able to reach the other side, but the landing was not as spectacular as he would have desired; instead of a graceful arrival like in the movies, he wiped out. He rolled twice and slammed, rear-first, into a tree. His left back wheel flew off, and his windshield cracked. When Fastlane got up, he realized that his entire back axel had been dislocated. As a result, he had to travel in robot form until Ultra Magnus found him.

"Cadet, you have five minutes to explain yourself and return to base."

Iceberg turned around to see Ultra Magnus looming over her. "I don't want to explain myself, and I also do not wish to return to base. Just allow me some time to reflect."

Ultra Magnus restrained him self from strangling the defiant cadet standing before him. "Iceberg, you are a cadet, and I am your **instructor**. Follow my order and resume your training, _now_."

"I do not desire to do so."

"Cadet, either go back or be punished."

"I'll go back after I finish becoming one with this world."

After Iceberg decided she was finished with her meditation session, she left for the training camp, allowing Ultra Magnus to search for the other cadets. A little while later, he managed to find Cobalt, who was hollering for help.

"Hello, Magnus, could you please assist me in freeing myself from this mesh of organic plant matter? I apologize for the state I am in, as I became overexcited in my observation of the native flora." Cobalt was wrapped up in a bundle of vines and dangling like an insect in a spider's web.

Ultra Magnus began tearing Cobalt free from the trees while asking the cadet about the locations of his friends. The answer he received was vague, as Cobalt had no specific knowledge of where his friends had gone.

Windshear shifted her body. A foxhole was not the most comfortable place to be, but it did hide her from any peeping eyes. She had not supported cutting classes, but Oceancruiser had talked her into it. When this was all over, she was going to drill the concept of responsibility into her friend's head.

"There are tracks here that lead to that pond." Fastlane muttered, stroking the dirt. "They're new too."

"That thing's too small. Windshear probably made those to fool us." Oceancruiser was walking around, calling Windshear's name. "Come on, you know it's just matter of time till I find you, so come out. Or are you chicken?"

"I am not a coward, Oceancruiser. Here I am." Windshear charged out from her hiding spot and tackled Oceancruiser. The two proceeded to tickle each other until they could do nothing else but spasm.

Crosscut was giddy with delight. He had happened upon a carcass of a freshly killed bear and wondering what was the fatal wound. Two bones on the leg had been broken, and one on the face as well. The neck had been snapped from recoil. The guts had been shattered in a way consistent with a fall. All the signs pointed to a collision with a heavy object of great mass. He loved inspecting dead bodies.

"Crosscut, come." Iceberg placed her hand upon Crosscut's shoulder. "If is time to return."

Crosscut pouted. "Aww…it's over already?"

Pallas stroked the plant with one finger. It was hard to believe that something so small, so delicate, had the power to kill. She felt that she could associate well with it. She too was delicate, yet capable of killing. She feared her own power, and she feared the powers of others.

She heard the sound of footsteps and spun around. Instead of anything threatening, Flower Wagon was standing there. He smiled, and offered her a flower. Pallas blushed. Out of all her comrades, Flower wagon was the one she did not fear. He was gentle and peaceful. His ideas matched her ideas closely, and he did not mind her workaholic tendencies.

"I wish I could say it's beautiful here, but you outshine everything here." Flower Wagon noticed Pallas blush. She looked really cute, standing there, unsure of what to do. He noted that her armor was carefully buffed, reflecting the sun at a beautiful angle. "Um…the weather is nice to day."

"Yeah, beautiful, isn't it?"

"It's nice enough to accent your armor."

Just as Pallas and Flower wagon seemed to be drawing closer, Oceancruiser jumped out at them. "Hey, Cobalt is watching here!"

"It is okay, Oceancruiser, we have already broken up, with the consent of both parties. It is alright for Pallas to pursue any other Autobot or Decepticon she desires to."

Oceancruiser made a face. "That still doesn't give her the right to smooch another guy in front of your face!"

Double-header hated to admit it, but she was lost. She was completely, utterly, absolutely lost. She had taken a wrong turn somewhere back and was now in unfamiliar territory.

There was a small noise behind her back, and she responded with firing a volley in the direction of the noise. She was answered by laser blasts aimed at her. One of those struck her shoulder, causing her to cry out in pain.

"Who are you?"

"Why don't you tell me who you are first?"

Something leapt at Double-header. More as a snap reaction than anything, she swung a fist at the figure's face. Blackout staggered back, holding her optic in pain.

"Blackout, sneaking up on me like that was really bad comedy. I could have hurt you badly." Double-header sighed in relief.

"Double-header, is that you?" Blackout was so relived that she had found a comrade that she did not pay any attention to her aching optic.

"Do you need a hint?" Double-header snapped. How could Blackout scare her like this?

"It **is** you! I thought you were an enemy!" Blackout had started to feel the painful throb of her optic now, but she was still pacified.

"Me too! Let's go back. I'm lost and scared."

"Yeah, who know what we may find out here."

"Do you think he'll find us?"

"No way."

"What if he comes over here?"

"This is the last place he'd look." Torpedo reassured Nightscream. The two were hiding inside the janitor's closet back at the campsite. Torpedo had concluded that the last place they would be found was a place under Ultra Magnus' nose. So far, the scientist had proven correct.

"I wish my big sister was here."

"Oceancruiser has other places to be right now." Torpedo saw Nightscream looking sad. "Don't worry, she'll be back."

"Peek-a-boo!" I found you!" Windshear pulled open the closet door

"How did you…'

"This is the last place Magnus would look, but the first place I'd look. Years of living with Oceancruiser will do that to you." She led the two cadets back to the mess hall. "All cadets present and accounted for, Ultra Magnus!"

Ultra Magnus collapsed into his recharge bed. It was only the first day, and they were driving him up the wall. Arcee had been right: no one in their correct state of mind would have tried to teach these ruffians. Unless, of course, said mech was already crazy or really needed the money. Thinking these thoughts, the city commander drifted off to sleep.


	3. Survival

Ultra Magnus woke up to the noise of footsteps at four in the morning. He groaned and turned around, wondering who would be up even before they were required. Finally, after ten minutes of attempting to go back to sleep and failing, Ultra Magnus decided to get up and investigate.

"Don't worry, we're almost home." Crosscut whispered to a bundle in his arms.

"Cadet, explain about that thing you're holding"

Crosscut gave Ultra Magnus his most innocent look. "Well…remember when I cut class yesterday?"

"Yes, Crosscut, now get on with it."

"I found this little guy in the woods. I'm naming her Annie." Crosscut held what he had been holding. It was an albino anaconda just big enough to fit into his hand. "Can I keep her? Please—I'll keep her in a cage and I'll be responsible!" He begged, trying to give off the impression of puppy eyes.

"Alright, but 'Annie' stays in her cage—or else."

The mess hall seemed rather peaceful, as opposed to the usual chatter of the cadets. Everyone was too tired to converse with each other. However, this peace was suddenly disrupted by a scream.

"Snake! There's a snake on the table!"

"Squash it, quick!"

"Oh Primus, Annie, come back!"

Twelve pairs of hands raised, ready to catch the snake. Annie, sensing danger, leapt into a cup of energon, which was immediately capsized by an overeager hand. Annie slithered into the space between energon cups, but once again, her hiding spot was unveiled by the cadets. Seeing no way out, she hopped onto the ceiling lamp. Oceancruiser instantaneously jumped on the table and started to swat at the offending reptile with a net. Her blows finally made contact, but Annie had escaped by then, so the ceiling lamp was the only thing damaged. Torpedo noticed something under the table and concluded Annie must be there, so he flipped the table. This, of course, infuriated Oceancruiser because she was still standing on the table.

Meanwhile, Ultra Magnus had noticed that Annie was slithering toward the door. He grabbed the net from Oceancruiser and charged toward the anaconda. Before he took one step, he slipped on a pool of energon. Nevertheless, he was still able to beat the snake to the door when he got up. Annie, becoming desperate, leapt at Ultra Magnus, fangs bared. Magnus also jumped at the snake, net at the ready. In one magnificent scoop, Ultra Magnus caught the anaconda and landed on his back.

"Thanks, Magnus; you can give her back now."

"Crosscut, put Annie where she belongs—**now**."

Crosscut shoved Annie into his mouth and turned around.

"No, Crosscut, where she truly **belongs**, and that does not mean your mouth."

"You mean she's supposed to go up my tailpipe?" Crosscut spat Annie out and faced Ultra Magnus.

"Her cage, Crosscut, put her back in her cage!"

"Oh, I understand now, thanks." Crosscut skipped back to his quarters to place Annie in her cage.

"Today's mission will be a test to see how well you can survive in the wilderness. You will be assigned a partner and given a minimum amount of energon. Then, you will be dropped into an unfamiliar location, from where you shall be expected return here by the time the sun sets." Ultra Magnus held six packs of supplies in front of him. "In here are not only your energon rations, but other materials as well. There is a tracer so you can know the location of your partner; a flare gun to fire off in case you find trouble that you cannot handle; and a manual that gives you a little bit of information about the organisms you may encounter. If your flare gun is fired, or if you do not return after dark, I will come to your aid with any other cadets who have returned, but you will automatically fail this test. As punishment for failure, you must write a five-hundred word essay describing your experiences during this test."

Cobalt groaned when he realized the ones who failed the test were likely to be heavily damaged, and this meant that he would be putting in extra hours in the sick bay. Of course, he found comfort in the fact that he finally got to tinker around with something. Now, he just hoped that Ultra Magnus would not stick him with someone who would be easily damaged.

"I will assign your partners now." Ultra Magnus announced. "Cobalt and Crosscut are team one."

Cobalt shot a glance at his partner. Crosscut was not the ideal teammate, but at least he was not going to be charging into danger any time soon.

"Team two consists of Pallas and Windshear."

"I'm glad I got this chance to know you better." Pallas commented. Windshear smiled at her, glad that she was not going to be hindered by random nonsense.

"Nightscream and Iceberg are team three."

"Sure…" Iceberg muttered. Her partner just stood there, picking his nose.

"Fastlane and Torpedo are team four."

"What in the pit? I wanted to be with Double-header!" Everyone just continued what they were doing and ignored Fastlane's outburst.

"Oceancruiser and Blackout are team five."

"What is the meaning of pairing me up with little miss anal-rentive here? Why couldn't you pair me up with Windshear?" Oceancruiser griped.

"As if I want to be working with you, traitor! You'd shoot me the second I turned my back on you!" Blackout snapped back.

"Team six consists of Double-header and Flower Wagon. Get with your partners and board me so I can take you to the area where you need to be." Ultra Magnus declared, seemingly oblivious to the two girls.

"Be careful, anything could be around here." Blackout hissed, clutching her machine gun.

"Can't you just ease up for one nanosecond? I can't see anything around here that could hurt us." Oceancruiser retorted.

"Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it's not here. It could be anywhere, just waiting for the chance to strike. Of course, I can't dismiss you as a threat either. You used to be a Decepticon." Blackout hugged her gun even tighter as she considered the possibilities.

"You just love to dig up old incidents, don't you?" Oceancruiser muttered. "You've got the sharpest senses out of all of us. Do you sense anything?"

"No, but…"

"Good, then there's nothing here. Stop being paranoid already."

"I'm built for security. I'd fail at my job if I wasn't paranoid."

"We're both just cadets right now. You're not an official security officer yet."

"I will be, and when I am, you better be careful not to let me see you making deals with Decepticons." Blackout's audios flashed with pride when Oceancruiser shut up, but her victory was short-lived; a bush rustled and she turned toward it. "Surrender if you know what's good for you!"

Apparently, the bush did not know what was good for it, since it made no motion to surrender and was subsequently blasted by Blackout's gun. The poor bush did not stand a chance—it was shredded to pieces. A squirrel ran from its obliterated hiding spot and took refuge within a tree.

"Blackout, what you did was overkill. It's just a squirrel."

"Well, it could always be a Decepticon squirrel."

"You're so paranoid that you could be the lovechild of Breakdown and Red Alert!" Oceancruiser snapped. If it was one thing she hated, it was Blackout's paranoid antics.

"Well, you're a knobkerrie!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know, but it sounded like an insult." Blackout was taken aback as she considered the meaning of her words.

"Maybe you got a lobotomy to make place for your paranoia circuits!"

"Well, at least I have circuits. Your lobotomy was probably so complete that your whole central processor was removed!"

"Shut up!"

"You shut up!"

"Paranoid."

"Treacherous."

"Uptight."

"Stupid."

Oceancruiser walked over to a tree and started to hit her head in exasperation. This wasn't getting them anywhere, and she was not in the mood to write an essay. Without a word, she turned and started walking away.

"Where do you think you're going?" Blackout demanded.

"Back to the camp, it's up to you whether or not to follow me."

"Fine, get away from me. I'll find my own way back. I don't trust you anyway." Blackout turned and started walking in the opposite direction. If Oceancruiser wanted to leave, then she could leave. It wasn't as if she cared for the traitor anyway.

Oceancruiser trudged through the forest. She didn't care if this was the right way or not: all she cared about was getting away from Blackout. She had despised the security officer ever since they first met on the battlefield, and the dislike had remained even when Oceancruiser switched sides.

A scream from behind her awoke Oceancruiser from her reverie. It seemed that Blackout had run into trouble. For a second, Oceancruiser contemplated coming to her partner's aid, but decided not to. After all, Blackout could take care of herself.

"Stupid little glitch probably deserved what was coming to her anyway."

"Come on, I'm not afraid of you." Blackout wielded a large branch in front of her. The bear, however, did not seem to be deterred by her warning and continued growling. Blackout tightened her grip, ready to defend herself if necessary.

What happened next was too fast for Blackout to comprehend. The bear charged forward at high speeds and tackled Blackout, knocking the branch out of her hands. Its claws dug into her shoulder, tearing open long slashes and causing Blackout to scream in pain. She swept her leg up almost instinctively and threw the bear off her, but it just rolled up and charged again. This time, however, Blackout was prepared for what would happen and whipped out her gun. Unfortunately, the bear was still too fast. Its jaws locked on Blackout's throat before she could fire any shots and shook her like a little rag doll before throwing her into a tree.

Oceancruiser hated to admit it, but her conscience was nagging at her. She had left her partner, who she was responsible for, to deal with who-knows-what alone. If Blackout died, then it would be Oceancruiser's fault. She could just imagine the punishment she would get for this. If she was lucky, she would probably be scrubbing toilets for the rest of her existence.

"But it wasn't my fault! Blackout wanted to run off! She's probably fine. In fact, I'd be more worried about what she ran into. She'd shoot that poor thing into pieces." Oceancruiser thought out loud.

You don't know that. The nagging voice in her head protested. You'll be responsible for her death. Do you really hate her that much? 

Shut up! She can take care of herself. 

What if she can't? What would you tell her loved ones? 

Alright already! I'll go save her, but I'll still hate that little glitch. 

Blackout desperately struggled to free herself from the brutal beating that the bear was giving her. For some unknown reason, this bear wanted to cruelly mutilate her, instead of going for a quick kill. This was no normal bear; instead, its enhanced strength and speed were powered by sadistic, berserk fury. Blackout looked in horror at its black, bottomless eyes. It was an oblivion delightfully sucking her in. There was no hope; she was going to die, and she had never before felt so afraid.

"Hey, rodent! That little piece of slag you're mauling is my partner. Now, why don't you put her down and step away before I resort to violence?" Oceancruiser grinned and waved at the bear.

The demonic animal, sensing new prey, dropped Blackout and turned to Oceancruiser, fangs bared. Before anyone could move, the bear barreled forward and seized Oceancruiser by her left arm.

"Is this how you want to play? Fine, just don't whine when I beat you into a pulp." Oceancruiser hauled herself up and locked her legs around the bear's neck. Then, she twisted her body in such a way that the bear was forced to release her unless it wanted a broken neck. Oceancruiser, still hanging upside-down, grabbed the bear's front legs and slammed both of her feet into the bear's throat in a series of kicks. The bear ducked its head under and reared, throwing Oceancruiser into the air. She flipped and landed on her hands, kicking the bear in the eye with her right leg.

Blackout watched the battle in amazement. Oceancruiser had come back to save her from the bear, just as Blackout was going to be killed. Amazement turned to suspicion as she considered the motives that this Decepticon traitor had for saving her. Surely, this was a plot to lower her guard.

Oceancruiser slammed her fist into the bear's stomach once again. The animal had put up a surprisingly good fight, but it was going to be over now. She curved her arm back for one final blow, only to be kicked away. Oceancruiser looked up in shock as the bear jumped on her and began to dance sadistically on her back, tearing off metal fragment and energon veins in malicious enjoyment.

Without thinking, Blackout pulled out her gun and let loose a spray of shots across the bear's back. Not until the pungent odor of burning flesh entered her olfactory receptors did she realize what she had done

"Thanks for the save, Miss Anal, you aren't as bad as you seem." Oceancruiser flashed Blackout a thumbs up before slamming her knee into the bear's chin.

"I don't know how that happened, but now that we're in the same boat, I don't care."

Oceancruiser shrugged and flipped the stampeding bear over her shoulder. She didn't except it to grasp her arm and to her toward its mouth. Two seconds later, the bear was grasping Oceancruiser's shoulder in his teeth and tearing apart her arm. Oceancruiser let out a shriek of pain as one of her arteries was completely ripped out and thrown to the side. Next, the bear stabbed a claw into her stomach and started to cleave slowly through her front side. Mech fluid was pooling beside Oceancruiser's body—her own mech fluid.

Blackout mentally debated whether or not she should rescue her partner. In the end, she decided that no one, not even traitors, should undergo this cruel and unusual punishment. She leveled her gun at the bear and fired, but it was too quick. With one jump, it managed to ram into her chest, knocking her back a few feet. The bear followed up by tearing its claws into Blackout and attempting to rip out her fuel pump, but Blackout was too fast and jumped back, escaping with only minor wounds.

"Hey, rodent! Eat heavy metal bow!" Oceancruiser, transformed into her alternate mode, slammed into the bear at her highest velocity. The bear was knocked into the ground with a nasty cracking noise. "That's the end of this battle."

"Oceancruiser, look out!" Blackout shrieked. The bear had limped up while Oceancruiser had her back turned and grabbed Oceancruiser's prow. Then, it proceeded to slam the poor femme into the ground many times. However, the bear also made the mistake of thinking that the battle was over, giving Oceancruiser the chance to transform and draw her sword.

"**Now** it's over, and stay dead this time!" Oceancruiser swung her sword into the back of the bear's neck, cutting a gash a few inches deep. The bear, whose animalistic instincts were only enhanced by pain, turned back and charged Oceancruiser. It was stopped when Blackout threw her gun at it, crushing the gun's butt and causing a bump to appear on the bear's head. Oceancruiser used the opportunity to stab the bear in between the eyes. The beast roared and stumbled back, dying and falling with a huge crash.

"What is your status, traitor?" Blackout limped over to examine her partner's injuries.

"First, I have a name—it's Oceancruiser. Second, my emotional state is better than well, since I've defeated that hulk of a monster. Thirdly, my physical status feels like slag because of you." Oceancruiser snapped.

"I didn't ask for help, but I appreciate what you did. However, this doesn't mean I like or trust you." Blackout helped Oceancruiser up to her feet. "In fact, this just makes you more suspicious."

"Hey, 'appreciate' is good enough for me."

"Has anyone seen Oceancruiser?" Windshear was desperately running around the camp, searching for her friend. Above her, storm clouds loomed ominously. "She should have been back like the rest of us. Where could she be?"

"I also note the distinctive absence of Blackout from this assembly." Cobalt stated. Five seconds later, Windshear was clenching his throat in her hands.

"Quit stating the obvious. Blackout was Oceancruiser's partner—**of course** she's missing too."

"I'm sorry, but this is the way I handle stress, much akin to how Fastlane talks rapidly and Torpedo stutters." Cobalt explained apologetically.

"ThisishorriblenothisisterriblemaybeevenworseIcantbelievethiswherecouldtheybewherewherewhere? ForallIknowtheycouldbekidnappedorhurtorworse! Dontyouhaveanythingyoucoulddo?" Fastlane was pacing a hole in the floor while muttering swiftly in a falsetto accent.

"C-c-calm down F-fastlane, I'm sure that Ultra M-magnus will have s-s-some s-sort of p-plan."

"I sincerely hope so." Pallas whispered. Flower Wagon put an arm around the femme to comfort her.

"What do you mean you hope Magnus has a plan? He either does or he doesn't; and if he doesn't I hope he bought medical and life insurance." Nightscream clenched his wing blade angrily. "It's all because of his crappy groups that my sister's lost in the first place!"

The room became silent as Ultra Magnus walked in, his face a mask of seriousness. "Oceancruiser and Blackout are missing, and we need to find them as soon as possible. Get back into you assigned group and spread out to search the area. If you find anything, fire your flare. If you do not find anything, rendezvous back at the lake at 2200 hours."

"That's it? That's your plan? I could have thought that up myself; and if I did, I would have saved myself a lot of time!" Nightscream's frustration had gotten the better of him, and he now pointed his sword at Ultra Magnus, determined to cause some damage.

"Nightscream, calm down, **now**. Ultra Magnus is your superior officer, and you have no authorization to threaten him. We are all as worried as you are, but that does not give us the right to damage innocent parties. Besides, Magnus is right—we need one solid plan instead of running around like a snake without a head. If we do not have a leader and insisted upon only following our plans, we would only exacerbate the situation." Windshear snapped at the seeker, causing him to back down, grumbling unintelligible words.

"Come on, guys, lets go find our friends!" Double-header called, transforming and rolling out.

"You're heavy." Blackout muttered, carrying Ocean cruiser on her back. It had started to rain, and water was sloshing down the backs of both the cadets.

"Well, the bear didn't dance on your back—it danced on mine." Oceancruiser mumbled as Blackout placed both under the shade of a tree. "You know, you shouldn't seek shelter under trees, because they're likely to be hit by lightning."

"Shut up, traitor, or you'll die of energon loss before I blow your cover." Blackout grumbled.

"What is it with you and blowing covers? You think everyone's a traitor except Prime himself!" Oceancruiser snapped. She hated when Blackout started on conspiracy theories.

"I'm a security officer—I plan for the worst!"

"No, you plan for the craziest. You're a paranoid sasquatch!"

"You're just a trash can that can float!"

"You probably carry a probe on you so you can poke around in people's heads!"

"Shut up, you Decepticon junk! You know nothing about me!" Blackout hissed venomously.

"You're right, and you know nothing about me either. We're both in the same boat here, so let's stop fighting and start looking for the camp." Oceancruiser snapped.

Blackout stared incredulously at her fellow cadet. "You know, that's the sanest thing I've heard you say all day. In fact, that's the sanest thing I've heard anyone say all day. I'm sorry for calling you a trash can, but I still don't trust you."

"Apology accepted. I'm sorry for calling you anal. I've been an insidious kumquat."

Blackout looked up at Oceancruiser. "What's a kumquat?"

"It's a human word. I don't know what it means, but it sounds like an insult. It's my favorite one, right up there with 'Philistine.'" Oceancruiser grinned at Blackout, eliciting a scowl from the other girl. "You've been pretty kumquat-ish yourself."

"Oceancruiser, where are you?" Windshear called, but only the sound of thunder and raindrops answered her. "If you can hear me, then give me a sign. This isn't funny!"

Pallas ran back, her feet sloshing in the muddy ground. "I've had no luck. What about you?"

"Does this look like I found them?"

"I'm sorry. We'll find them; don't lose hope."

"Thanks, Pallas. I'm sure we'll find them. Then, I'm going to lecture Oceancruiser on the virtues of being on time." Windshear gave Pallas an unsure smile and patted her partner on the shoulder.

"Do you hear anything?" Blackout asked warily.

"No, you've got the sharp senses. I can't make out a thing in all this rain."

"I'm going to try a flare. I just hope that nothing's wet."

"Here, use my gun. With the shape your gun is in now, you're gonna be lucky if it doesn't blow up in your face." Oceancruiser threw her bazooka at Blackout. "Just be careful not to scratch the barrel."

Blackout pulled the flare out of her subspace pocket and fitted it to the bazooka. As she pulled her hand away, she yelp in pain.

"What's wrong?" Oceancruiser turned toward her partner.

"I broke a nail."

"So? They're fake nails anyway."

"I know, but it still hurts. Besides, it'll take hours to glue it back on again."

"You know, I didn't think this was possible."

"What wasn't possible?"

"The two of us having a civilized conversation, Miss Paranoia."

"I didn't think this was possible either. You're usually so stupid that the only one who can understand you is Fastlane."

"Just fire the flare already. You're making me want to puke."

"This stinks! I can't find my sister anywhere!" Nightscream kicked the closest tree to emphasize his rage.

"I am also incapable of locating Blackout." Iceberg stated coldly.

"How could you be so calm at a time like this?" Nightscream raged. "Blackout was your best friend and you act like noting happened!"

"Panicking never helped a situation either. I work better if I keep a clear head."

"I want my big sister…" Nightscream dropped into a fetal position and closed his eyes, hoping that this was just a nightmare. The sound of something exploding snapped him out of his daydream and made him look up. A flare was illuminating the sky.

"That looked like a signal from Blackout." Iceberg observed.

"Yahoo! Wait for me, sis, I'm coming!" Instantly, Nightscream transformed from some one who looked like he had run fifty laps around Cybertron to someone who seemed to be on sugar-high.

"Hey Blackout, I see someone heading toward us! We're saved!" Oceancruiser called eagerly, waving at the approaching mechanisms.

"Are you alright, sister? You look like you've been run through a trash masher!" Nightscream scooped up his older sister, obviously worried.

"Don't worry, Night, it hurts worse than it actually is."

"Thank Primus." Nightscream heaved a sigh of relief when he realized that his sister would be okay.

"Let's go before the area floods or the rain clogs our gears." Iceberg was cradling Blackout in her arms like a newborn infant.

"What did you hit this time, Oceancruiser?" Cobalt was pacing around the tables in anger and concern.

"Oh, just a huge, sadistic bear from the pit, and maybe the ground; nothing new." Oceancruiser was flashing everybody her trademark smile.

"Please be quiet. You'll exhaust yourself more if you talk." Cobalt's fingers were nimbly repairing the two cadets as he spoke. "Sorry, about this, but you made it back after dark, and you fired your flare. I think you will probably be required to write an essay."

"Oh great, I was never good at writing stuff." Oceancruiser grumbled.

"At least you made it back in one piece. I still remember all the times that you would come back, holding one of your body parts in your hand and begging me to reattach it." Cobalt winced at the memory. No matter how many times he went into the sick bay, he never got used to seeing death and injury. Instead, he became more nauseous every time he saw something like that, especially if it included bodies that were in pieces.

'Hey Cobalt, what's a kumquat?" Oceancruiser asked. Cobalt was so smart he probably read the human dictionary, so he could answer this for her.

"It's a human word meaning a small citrus fruit."

"I thought it was derisive. Oh well, it still makes for a good insult."

"I can't believe I survived having that Decepticon traitor as my partner. The only thing worse than her treachery is her stupidity and blind hyperactivity; I wonder who screwed up on her personality circuits." Blackout stated. Windshear just looked on sympathetically.

"Don't you mean who messed up your circuits? I'm sure that you weren't meant to be so paranoid." Oceancruiser smirked at Blackout.

"I'm not paranoid: I just prepare for the worst, which means you."

"That's enough." Ultra Magnus walked into the room. "You both have failed your exams and need to write the essay to make up for it."

"Does it look like my sister is in any shape to write your stupid essay?" Nightscream whipped his sword out at Magnus.

"I concur. Blackout is too seriously injured to write an essay." Iceberg protested.

"I meant when they get out of the sick bay. They will write their essay during their rest time tomorrow."

'What?" Oceancruiser glared up at her instructor. "This is cruel and unusual punishment!"

"You failed the test, and you must be treated like anybody else. You already had your warning before the exam started."

Oceancruiser turned her glare to Blackout. "If it wasn't for your paranoid actions, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"What do you mean? It's your fault. You're the one who just ran off."

"It's your fault."

"It's yours."

Windshear shook her head as the two bickered about whose fault it was. "Well, they're back to normal, and all's right with the world."

"Yes, the vibes around this place have returned to a state of balance; at least for now." Blackout looked up at Windshear. For a second, Windshear thought that a ghost of a smile appeared of Blackout's face, but it passed to quickly for her to be sure.


	4. Reunion

_Sorry fo making such a long author's note, but I forgot it last chapter. Anyway, I apologize if the the fic was bad. I basically abadoned humor for attempted character developement and action scenes. In this chapter, Stormcloud and Mayday belong to Storm Blue Lightning Saix. Thank you forgiving me nice reviews, and a special thanksto the one who graciously allowed me to useher characters. I only hope I can do them justice, even with my atrocious writing skills._

"Hey, pass the bolts." Oceancruiser was devouring her meal ravenously. It was no surprise to the other cadets, since she had not eaten dinner or lunch the day before.

"Oceancruiser, Blackout is every last bit as hungry as you are, but I don't see her eating like an Insecticon." Windshear gently whacked Oceancruiser in disapproval.

"Well, I can't help it. I've got a big appetite—I need it to support my functions."

"Perhaps it would be beneficial if you ate less. At least then you wouldn't be so hyper."

"Windshear, Oceancruiser does need her energy if she if to fight using her martial arts moves." Cobalt smiled at the two girls while he slowly sipped his energon cube.

"Thanks, Cobalt." Oceancruiser turned to the cadet medic. "You didn't experiment on me, did you?"

"Of course I didn't. Ultra Magnus supervised the entire process. He made sure that I exercised self control."

"Speaking of Magnus, where is he now?" Torpedo pondered.

As if he was responding to Torpedo's question, Ultra Magnus walked in. He seemed a little disheveled, but that was because he did not go to sleep until four-thirty in the morning. Since the cadets were required to wake at five o' clock, it meant their instructor had only gotten slightly more than one half hour of sleep. The reason for this was that he had kept watch over Oceancruiser and Blackout all night. Unknown to some people, Ultra Magnus actually cared deeply for his subordinates. In his eyes, the cadets, especially Nightracer, were like the children he never had. He did not desire for Cobalt to exhaust himself, but he did not want the Oceancruiser and Blackout to be alone either. Therefore, he substituted for Cobalt on night-duty and denied himself of sleep, keeping a vigil on the girls the entire time.

Just as Magnus approached the table, his communicator beeped. A happy female voice with a southern drawl chirped out at him.

"Hi there, Magnus, this is Stormcloud. We're having a reunion over here in Florida, and we'd love it if you came too! I mean, the old gang could get together, and it would be just like it used to be. What do you say to that?"

"Sorry, Stormy, but I can't come." Magnus noticed the cadets staring at him and shooed them away.

"Why not? It'll be the first time we've seen each other in a millennia. Everybody's going to be there!"

"Sorry, but I've got special duties, Stormy."

"Magnus has a girlfriend, Magnus has a girlfriend!" Oceancruiser teased in a sing-song voice.

"Excuse me for a second." Ultra Magnus turned to Oceancruiser. "Stormcloud is not my girlfriend. She's just a friend who one worked in the same unit that I did."

"Just a friend, huh? Let me talk to her to see what she has to say." Oceancruiser dived at Ultra Magnus and grasped his left arm with one hand while holding his right shoulder in the other, thus rendering him incapable of moving his arms. Nightscream jumped on his right leg, while Fastlane attached him to Magnus' right leg, also inhibiting him from walking.

"What are you doing?"

"Give up, Ultra Magnus." Oceancruiser smirked smugly. "We won't release you unless you agree to give us the communicator."

"Not a chance." Magnus growled. "Sorry, Stormy, but I have to put you on hold."

"Is anything wrong? I heard a skirmish."

"No, I'm perfectly okay." Ultra Magnus turned his attention to the cadets. First, he pulled Oceancruiser over his shoulder in a judo flip. Then, he pulled both of the boys off his legs. With this threat now nullified, Magnus ran into the sanctuary of the nearest closet.

"Cadets, get him before he escapes!" Oceancruiser ordered, a big smile stretching on her face.

"We're all fine, Magnus, in fact, we're better than ever. Wingnut and Darkshard are looking for headmaster partners on Nebulos, but they've had no luck so far. They said they'd come back, and I reckon it'll be before twelve o' clock too. Longshot and Nightrider got married in Vegas just two years ago. According to Longshot, it took forever for them to find a human priest who would authorize marriage between two large, not to mention somewhat over-energized robots! Steelburst took some college classes during the summer, and now he's a part-time motivational speaker. Quicksurge is still trying to find a girlfriend—he even tried to buy one off eBay. Steamhammer finally got a job as a monster truck, but he came back after a week because he liked repairs better than demolitions. As for me, I'm training a new recruit called Mayday. She's a bit quiet, but very friendly: a real delight to be with." Stormcloud updated Magnus on the current conditions of their old unit.

"Longshot and Nightrider got married? The two mechs who swore never to be tied down, especially not to each other? Excuse me while I pinch myself." Magnus joked into the communicator. Finally, he was in a place where the cadets would not bother him while he talked with an old friend.

"Magnus, if you don't come out, we'll come in!" Oceancruiser called to Ultra Magnus outside of the locked closet. After receiving no reply, she turned to her accomplices. "You ready?"

"Yes!" Fastlane and Nightscream held Flower Wagon like a battering ram.

"Excuse me, but why do I have to be used as the ram?" Flower Wagon protested.

"Because you have the hardest head and a few bumps wouldn't hurt so much." Oceancruiser explained. "Okay, boys, let her rip!"

"This is going to hurt…" Flower Wagon muttered as he was slammed into the door head-first again and again. After five minutes of endlessly smashing, the door finally gave way.

"Flower Wagon, what are you doing?" Ultra Magnus looked up indignantly, as if someone had snuck up on him in the bath.

"Sorry, Magnus, but we need the com."

Oceancruiser grabbed the communicator from Ultra Magnus, who was still staring forward in shock. "My name is Oceancruiser, and I'm one of the cadets that Magnus is training. I have an idea, Stormcloud. Why don't you come here if Magnus can't go there?"

"Great idea! I'll bring Mayday too!"

Oceancruiser beamed at Ultra Magnus. "Well, since we have so many preparations to make, I guess I won't have to write that essay after all."

"Good morning, y'all; I hope I ain't bothering nothing." Stormcloud stepped out of her small shuttle. She was pale azure with white accents on her limbs and door-wings. Her alternate mode was a Ford Saturn with a large machine gun cannon attached to the roof. She had indigo colored optics and an odd helmet shape that attempted to simulate a layered bob hairdo, thus defining her as an older model, created before the invention of synthetic hair. There were claws strapped on to her hands that seemed to shine with a cruel light. For some reason she carried a collapsible double bladed halberd that would have been her front axle in car form. This halberd had a glaive blade on one end and a spear point on the other. There was also a jagged golden blade built into her leg, just like Oceancruiser.

"Hi, I'm Mayday. Glad to meet you guys." The girl behind Stormcloud whispered. She was a crimson red baron bi-plane with black and gold highlights. Her optics were as blue as the eye of a storm. Like most of the new plane models, she was equipped with a wing blade, but both wings snapped off to form twin katanas. She also had a machine gun, but it was tucked away in her subspace pocket.

"Sorry, about her, she's kinda shy. She usually talks more, but that's when she's around her friends. She recently got sent here on a mission while her friends are back on Cybertron." Stormcloud apologized.

"Don't worry; we'll make her feel right at home." Windshear glanced toward Oceancruiser. "Isn't that right?"

"Of course, Windshear. My name's Oceancruiser. Double-header and I'll show you to your room, May. Can I call you May? I'm not good at French, but I'm very good at English and Chinese, and maybe some Japanese! So, as they say in Japan—hajimemashite, douzou yoroshiku; or as they say in China—Nihao! I'm glad to meet you for the first time! I hope we can hang out together the whole time you're here. Can we hang out? How long are you here for?" Oceancruiser was practically giddy with joy.

"Sorry about Oceancruiser. She's sort of hyper." Double-header explained. "I'm Double-header, welcome to our training camp. I hope you enjoy your stay."

"It's completely okay, Double-header, I like how Oceancruiser is so friendly. I can handle all of her questions. Yes, you can all me May. Yes, we can hang out, but I have to go back tomorrow. The reunion's coming up, and Miss Stormcloud doesn't want to miss it." Mayday nodded at Oceancruiser.

"All right then, you can follow me for a tour of this camp!" Oceancruiser skipped on ahead while Double-header followed, leading Mayday by the hand.

"And this is the mess hall! The energon here is actually pretty good, not low-grade slop they served in the academy." Oceancruiser was introducing Mayday to the rooms eagerly.

"Please, don't get mad at her. She's just zealous." Double-header excused her friend's actions.

"No, I'm not mad. She's just like my best friend on Cybertron sometimes." Mayday admitted while the three girls walked around the cabins. Unseen to them, a black slime was slithering out from behind the energon cubes...

"These cabins are the living quarters, and this is your room!" Oceancruiser threw open the door to one of the cabins. "Actually, this is the girls' shared room, and it's my bed, but someone screwed up and gave me a bunk bed, so you can share with me."

"Thank you."

"You know, this is the last place I'd imagine you to be. You just weren't good with kids." Stormcloud admitted as she sat beside Ultra Magnus, sipping an energon cube.

"Please, don't remind me." Magnus muttered.

"Well, mechanisms change, and I'm proud of you. Taking this job must have taken a lot of courage, since this is your weak point. Heck, look at me. I used to be violent and I thought everyone was perverted. I thought I could only trust myself, but look at me now."

"Actually, Orion just blackmailed me with photos of my senior prom."

"The one where you got drunk off your skid plate from spiked energon?"

"The exact same one. Needless to say, Ratchet now knows not to spike anything else."

"I still don't get it. Those photos came from back when you were Dion. Nobody would know it was you."

"Yeah, nobody except for Kup and Ironhide and Ratchet and Gears and Brawn and Springer and Hot Rod and Arcee and Blaster and Broadside and the Aerialbots…"

"Okay, okay, I understand; but how did they know?"

"Let's just say some planes had big mouths." Magnus looked up at Stormcloud, who was fidgeting in her seat. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just need to go to the restroom." Stormcloud ran in the general direstion of the outhouse, leaving Ultra Magnus alone. Neither noticed the black tentacles wrapping around Magnus' chair.

"Hey, May, do you want to know a secret?" Oceancruiser stared intently at Mayday.

"What's the secret?"

"The secret is…this pile of energon goodies!"

"You swiped that off Ratchet, didn't you?" Windshear chose that moment to walk into the room. "He's going to be livid when he finds out." Ratchet always kept a stash of energon goodies in an undisclosed location in case an Autobot was low on energy, but did not desire to be hooked up to a feeding tube. The goodies would reenergize the Autobot faster than anything else. Somehow, Oceancruiser had found the stash and took some of the goodies to camp.

"Never mind how I got them." A mischievous grin rose on Oceancruiser's face. "Windshear, Mayday, I challenge you to an energon goodie eating contest!"

The Goop Matrix stared at the hand of its new host. This body was not what it desired, but it would do for now. Creation, assimilation, and destruction—those were its only functions. One day, the whole world would be property of the Goop. The Goop Matrix lumbered over to the nearest machine—the octane dispenser—and touched it. Instantly, it became covered in black tentacles and jumped to life.

The Goop Matrix allowed a smile to appear on the lips of its host. This first assimilation, this first subordinate, was the key to the assimilation of this area, and then the world. Behind it, the octane dispenser clanked, also searching for a target to assimilate

"Dare to be stupid—it's alright! Dare to be stupid—join the crowd!" Oceancruiser jumped up and down on the bed, bellowing out the lyrics in a tone-deaf manner.

"I give up, how can you ingest this many goodies and not be hyper?' Windshear threw her hands up in mock frustration. The only answer she received was a cryptic smile.

"While you guys eat this stuff, I'll go get some **real** food. Be back in a sec." Double-header sauntered out of the door.

Double-header popped another bolt from the sack into her mouth. To her, bolts were like potato chips to humans: a delectable snack. Out of the corner of her optic, she saw Ultra Magnus approaching.

"Hello, sir, how's the reunion—" Double-header stopped in the middle of her sentence when she noticed something wrong. There were black tentacles wrapped around Ultra Magnus, covering every inch of his body. Behind him, an assortment of household appliances clattered as if alive, also covered completely in black tentacles.

"We are the Goop. There is no escape. Your assimilation is imminent." Ultra Magnus droned. Behind him, the appliances buzzed, as if agreeing with him.

"I don't care if you're the Swarm. Get away from me!" Double-header chucked her bag of nuts and bolt at Magnus, but he whacked it away easily. Next, she attempted a chair, but Ultra Magnus also threw it away like it was nothing. Then she tried a table, which made contact, but Magnus continued to advance. Double-header, who was now really scared, ripped the snack machine out of its socket and chipped it at the swarm of machines; this time Ultra Magnus grabbed the snack machine, covering it in tentacles as well. Double header tried to run, but the snack machine's cord wrapped around her leg while Ultra Magnus grabbed her shoulders.

"What are you doing? Let go of me! Let go…" Double-header's eyes glowed red and she stopped struggling. "We are the Goop. There is no escape. Your assimilation is imminent."

"There seems to be a few snapped wires here." Torpedo and Blackout were running their daily systems check. So far, the only errors had been in the alarms, but Blackout was worried about more security system malfunctions. In no time, she had started one of her worst scenario speeches.

"We are the Goop. There is no escape. Your assimilation is imminent." The door to the security center was ripped open by the Goop Matrix and its subordinates.

"Is this some kind of joke?" Torpedo, not sensing the danger, did not stand a chance. Double-header simply placed her hand on his chest and assimilated him into the Goop. Blackout, sensing something wrong, pushed the code red alarm button, praying that it would work.

"I've activated the alarm. You'll get out if you know what's good for you." Blackout aimed her gun at the Goop and fired, but it was not even fazed. Double-header and Torpedo grabbed Blackout's arms, assimilating her.

"Guys, I'm worried. It's been fifteen minutes since Double-header went to get some snacks, and she still hasn't come back." Windshear frowned at the thought of some thing bad happening.

"Relax; she just went to the restroom or something." Oceancruiser was lying on the top bunk, absent-mindedly playing with a bundle of her radar and sonar receivers.

Before Windshear could speculate on Double-header's location, the alarms rang out. Heavy-metal music blared in the cadets' audios, while red lights flashed before their optics. "We've got a code red emergency. Arm yourselves and move out!"

"We are the Goop. There is no escape. Your assimilation is imminent." The Goop continued advancing when Iceberg, Cobalt, and Flower Wagon ran into the Instructor's Cabin.

"What in the pit is that thing?" Cobalt's optics widened as he stared at the tentacle-covered Autobots.

'Some sort of hive mentality. Its aura is completely amalgamated." Iceberg took a step away from the Goop.

"What do we do now?" Flower Wagon whispered.

"I'll try to become one with it. That's the only way to defeat it." Iceberg hissed.

"You're crazy. That thing will dominate your body and spark!" Cobalt objected.

Iceberg ignored her fellow cadet and stood in front of the Goop. "Go ahead, assimilate me. Let me become one with you." The Goop Matrix wrapped its arms around Iceberg's tall, thin shape. The cadet was made in another subordinate as three more figures came running in.

"That thing absorbs transformers! What do we do?" Mayday jumped behind Windshear in fear.

"We run away to somewhere safe and think up a strategy, **now**." Windshear grabbed Mayday and dashed toward the nearest exit. Oceancruiser, Cobalt, and Flower Wagon hesitated for a second before doing the same.

"What do you think tripped the alarm?" Pallas, Crosscut, Nightscream were scampering toward the Instructor's Cabin.

"It was probably just a rat that snuck up on Blackout." Crosscut snorted. He had been in the middle of a violent comic book when the alarm rang.

"That wasn't very nice." Pallas frowned.

"Run away!" Mayday screamed as she and the rest of her party dashed down the road. Crosscut and Pallas just stared at them in confusion. Naturally, they didn't even notice the Goop when it assimilated both of them.

"Nightscream, come on!" Oceancruiser screamed a warning at her brother. Nightscream, however, was too bewildered to budge, so Oceancruiser threw him on her shoulder and continued running.

"Did we lose them?" Cobalt panted. The cadets were a mile into the forest, where they would be sufficiently camouflaged.

"No," Oceancruiser whispered. "They're on our left and approaching us as we speak."

"How do you know that?" Mayday inquired.

"I'm a ship. I just used my radar."

"Where's your radar? I didn't recall seeing any screens on you.'

"It's on my head. My hair is my radar/sonar system."

"Sorry to break up your anatomy discussion, but here they come!" Cobalt alerted everyone to the presence of the Goop.

Everyone began running again, but Windshear tripped when the snack machine wrapped a wire around her leg. Nightscream noticed and stopped to help her while everyone ran on. He chopped a light fixture in half with his sword, and then blew a waste fuel dispenser to pieces. The next victim was the snack machine, which was eviscerated, causing its horde of snacks to spill out. When Double-header came forward, she too was repelled.

"There, you're safe… now?" Nightscream noticed Windshear's optics glowing red when he tried to help her up. Before he could react, she had assimilated him.

"What do we do now?" Flower Wagon was huddled in the storeroom like everyone else.

"I don't know. Windshear was the one who had the good strategies." Oceancruiser muttered. "Maybe the only thing we can do is fight to the end."

"Maybe we should pray to Primus to spare us." Cobalt suggested sarcastically.

"Primus is busy; can **I** help you?" Stormcloud stood at the doorway of the storeroom.

'Watch out, they're coming!" Oceancruiser noticed the Goop approaching. It had increased ten times in number by assimilating almost all the appliances.

"You asked for this, not me." Stormcloud began to swing her halberd in deadly circles. Some appliances were sliced in half, while others were impaled. When Nightscream tried to sneak up on her, she brought her weapon in a backward slash that took off his left arm. Oddly, Nightscream seemed to feel no pain, and his left arm jumped from its place on the ground to grab Stormcloud's halberd.

"Want it? You can have it." Stormcloud pushed her halberd toward Nightscream, who was temporarily overwhelmed by its wait. Using that distraction, Stormcloud grabbed her sword and stabbed the young seeker in the stomach. However, the wound just healed and the arm also reattached itself. Undeterred, Stormcloud continued to slice and dice any part of the goop that threatened to come near.

"Stormcloud, stop, you'll hurt my brother!" Oceancruiser ran over and stood between Nightscream and Stormcloud.

"Oceancruiser, get away I can't control myself! The goop is controlling me!" Nightscream called in a moment of consciousness.

"I don't care if you absorb me. You're the last person I want to fight." Oceancruiser wrapped her arms around Nightscream. "Let's fight together, bro."

"This is great, one more for me to fight." Blackout slashed a strange looking machine with her sword and then jammed her claws into it, sending it off with a burst of lightning. "You three, get away from here. I can't hold them off forever!" She swung her claws into Ultra Magnus' neck and gave him a nasty shock with her lightening powers. She spun around to see the cadets running away and grinned. "Now I don't have to worry about hurting them, I can worry all about defeating you!"

As the cadets ran back into the boys' cabin, they looked back too see a gigantic burst of lightning from the direction of the storeroom. They collapsed once they had reached the temporary sanctuary of the cabin. By this time, Cobalt, Flower Wagon, and Mayday were the only ones left.

"Do you think they've got her?" Mayday muttered.

"Hard to say, but they probably did. There were so many of them and only one of her." Cobalt answered, poking the dirt.

'We're doomed! Nobody can beat that thing!" Flower Wagon broke down and started blubbering.

"We aren't made to fight! We'll probably be its next meal! We should go to the nearest town and ask for help. No, what can those humans do. We're gonna die. I just know it, we're gonna die. Let's pray to Primus that we'll survive this." Mayday had also begun panicking.

"Both of you shut up and calm down!" Cobalt slapped both of the panicking cadets in the face. "I know that we have a distinct tactical disadvantage, but nothing's invincible. We just have to throw everything we have at it and hope it works! Above all remain calm, so it won't be so easy for it to assimilate us. Fight them, but be careful. If you're dumb enough to get hurt, then I'll put your head in your right leg socket, your right leg in your left arm socket, your left arm in your right arm socket, your right arm in your left leg socket, and your left leg in your head socket!"

"For a second there, you sounded like Ratchet." Flower Wagon quipped.

"I'll take that as a compliment." Before the discussion could go any further, the Goop, this time including Stormcloud, broke down the cabin doors.

"Get away from them!" Mayday took out her wing katanas and attempted to fight the swarm of tentacles. Flower Wagon, eager to help, chipped an energon soda at the nearest possessed appliance. To everyone's surprise, the tentacles melted off on contact with the soda. As if suddenly being enlightened to some horrifying fact, the Goop turned around and ran out of there.

"Flower Wagon, that was amazing. What did you throw at them?"

"I just grabbed one of Crosscut's energon sodas." Flower Wagon scratched his head. "I was desperate."

"Well, thanks to your desperation, we have a way to stop the Goop. We'll fill up the sprinklers with it and then gather all of the possessed Autobots. When they get here, we'll trigger the fire alarm, and cause the soda to pour down." Cobalt proposed.

"Great idea, but we don't have that much soda!" Mayday remonstrated.

"We could always use that matter duplicator you and Torpedo built for a science project." Flower Wagon turned to Cobalt, awaiting an answer.

"You mean the on that worked perfectly once and never worked again? If I fixed it and we used the energon from the cafeteria, then it would probably work."

"Then what are we waiting for? I may not be an engineer, but I've hung out with engineers before" Mayday beamed with enthusiasm.

Two hours later, they were still working on the machine. Mayday and Flower Wagon had panicked when they thought the Goop was returning and Cobalt had to calm both of them down. The machine, seemingly taking a perverse enjoyment in torturing them, refused to work. The one time it had come close to working, it blew smoke in everyone's face.

"I think I've got it!" Mayday fell back, relieved. "Go ahead, test it."

Flower Wagon activated the machine, and all seemed well. It shook and sputtered while a beam popped out and scanned the soda. Then, without warning, it just stopped.

"Slag, it just doesn't work." Flower Wagon grew exasperated enough to let one slip.

"Get out of the way, both of you." Cobalt took a few steps back and concentrated on the machine.

"You aren't going to try that, are you?" Flower Wagon inquired.

"At this point, what choice do we have?" Cobalt narrowed his optics.

"This is going to hurt." Flower Wagon pulled Mayday away as Cobalt charged at the machine and slammed his best kick into the front. The machine sputtered, and shot out a beam the created a huge pile of energon soda. Cobalt gave Flower Wagon and Mayday high fives as the three of them began to load the sprinklers.

"Flower Wagon, Mayday, listen up. This is the plan—we will split up and attract the Goop to go in three directions. Then, we will rendezvous back in the Instructor's cabin, where I will activate the fire alarm. Am I understood?"

"Yes, sir."

"Hey, you lousy Star Trek rejects! Come get me!" Mayday called to the group of Oceancruiser, Windshear, Pallas, and Fastlane. Upon hearing her, the three, along with their subordinate machines gave chase.

Meanwhile, Flower Wagon had attempted to soothe his opponents with music. However, Ultra Magnus, Torpedo, Nightscream and Double-header seemed to dislike banjo music, and were now chasing Flower Wagon like they wanted to disembowel him. Naturally, Flower Wagon just closed his eyes and ran for his life.

As for Cobalt, he just sat in the Instructor's cabin and waited for Blackout, Iceberg, Crosscut, and Stormcloud to find him. Now, as he sat in the office, he pondered how he was going to keep the Goop in the room. His thoughts were rudely interrupted as Mayday and Flower Wagon burst in.

"Cobalt, how do we get them to be still?" Mayday asked frantically.

As if to answer her, the Goop began to speak. "We are the Goop. We are Iceberg. We will hold still so we may be purified."

Cobalt needed no more prompting. He smashed the glass to the fire alarm and pulled the lever. Instantly, the sprinklers began to spray soda. As the Goop came into contact, it melted away and dissolved into the ground.

"Ugh, what happened?" Ultra Magnus muttered. "Last thing I remember was talking to Stormcloud."

"You did it, Iceberg! Your plan worked!" Cobalt slapped Iceberg on her shoulder.

"Thank you, but I almost failed. I now know that I should not try that so often" Iceberg admitted. As always, her voice was calm and cold.

"Well, Magnus, you started this mess, so you clean it." Oceancruiser pointed toward the inactive slime on the ground.

"Yeah, good luck." Nightscream handed Ultra Magnus a mop and bucket. Then he walked away with everyone else, leaving a dumbfounded Magnus standing there.


	5. Monster

The suns rays glistened upon the earth, reflecting off the water in dazzling spectacles. Normally one would appreciate such a sight, but not today. Cobalt swatted at the ray of sunshine that shone on his face, hoping that it would go away. It had been a long day yesterday, since everyone was possessed by a bizarre substance known only as the goop. It had taken Cobalt hours to free them and attempt to find a sample of the goop big enough to be taken for study, yet small enough to be safely approached.

As if to spite Cobalt, the camp's rendition of Reveille blared over the speakers, exposing everyone's sensitive audios to the mangled musical number. Cobalt groaned as he realized that he was unable to go back to sleep. Cursing whatever cosmic entity that was conspiring against him, Cobalt dragged his exhausted frame out of bed.

"My Bonnie lies over the ocean, my Bonnie lies over the sea! My Bonnie lies over the Ocean, so bring back my Bonnie to me! To me, to me…" Stormcloud was running around in a hot pink ballet skirt with a fake mustache on her face while singing. She was also table dancing around Ultra Magnus, who looked embarrassed and frustrated at the same time.

"It's too early in the morning for this." Cobalt grumbled.

"It could always be worse." Oceancruiser groaned.

"How?"

"She could be in the room next to yours."

"That's definitely worse." Cobalt watched the disgusting display. Like a train wreck, the sight was gross, but too fascinating to turn away from. "What happened?"

"Everything's your fault." Windshear stared at Cobalt. Obviously, she had not gotten much sleep either.

"How is it my fault?"

"She got into the energon soda that you made for fighting the Goop." Windshear snapped. Stormcloud had woken all of the girls up early and taken them on "special training." According to Double-header, that was code for "embarrassing, exhausting torture devised by annoying morning people." Even Oceancruiser, with all her energy, had been worn down by that ordeal.

'What do we do now?"

"We wait for the energon soda to wear off. That could take anywhere from ten minutes to twenty-four hours." Mayday explained. "We should have trashed the leftover soda."

"Is everyone done eating" Ultra Magnus' question was answered by grunts of confirmation. "Good, we can begin the training. Mayday, since you are staying with us, you have to join in the training exercises. In the morning, we will run laps and then have a round of target practice, followed by a sparring session. In the afternoon, we will have a battle simulation of a situation where you will be split into two teams. The objective is to achieve the goals given to you in the instructions."

"I'm okay with that. It's been a long time since I've played around like this." Mayday gave everyone a thumbs-up sign.

"You maggots look pathetic. You aren't even trying!" The cadets were running laps around the training ground while Magnus belted out words of "encouragement."

"Is he usually like this?" Mayday turned to ask Double-header."

"Usually, he's worse." Double-header replied. "He acts like he has an unbendable spine or something."

"Ultra Magnus is just strict. He's an experienced soldier, after all." Pallas rationalized. "He was probably wild in his youth too."

"You're running for your lives, not having a tea party. Now go!" Ultra Magnus raised his voice at the girls.

"Blow it out of your exhaust." Double-header mumbled under her breath. This caused her to lose concentration over her steps, however, and she tripped over her own feet, tumbling into the other cadets and causing a pileup.

"I told you that there was something wrong with the vibe of this place." Iceberg asserted. She had once again gone too slowly for her to become tangled in anything.

"Shut up and help me untangle them. I don't have all day. Target is next on the training list and I don't want any delays.' Ultra Magnus growled at the insubordinate cadet.

"Fine, I'll help, but only because I want this to get done soon. I feel a wicked aura approaching." Iceberg stepped forward to help Magnus with the cadets.

When everybody was sufficiently untangled, Ultra Magnus handed them each an auto-gun and ordered them to hit the probe zooming over their heads. Shots filled the sky as the poor probe was obliterated in seconds. Ultra Magnus released a second probe that was more agile and durable than the first one, which presented a bigger problem. It was finally taken down by a shot from Mayday to its one weak spot.

"Did you see that, guys? Pretty good, huh?" Mayday received nods of approval from all of the other cadets.

"Yes, that may have been good by your standards, but it was barely mediocre by mine. Did you realize that you missed three shots before finally hitting your target? During that time, the enemy could have attacked you." Ultra Magnus drew yet another probe from his subspace pocket. "This one simulates situations you may encounter on the battlefield. It will not only avoid your shots, but it will fire stun beams. If you do not shoot it down fast, you will probably be twitching on the ground."

The second Ultra Magnus released the probe, gunfire hailed at the unfortunate apparatus. It swerved and ducked most of the shots, receiving only scratches. In retaliation, it fired its stun beam, almost hitting Fastlane and slightly singeing Torpedo.

"That thing's for real! Hit it with everything you've got!" Oceancruiser called.

Yet another volley, this time more accurate, slammed into the probe. This time, parts of its armor flew off, exposing the inner circuits. However, it seemed to realize this and flew with only its undamaged side to the cadets. A shot from Pallas shorted out its equilibrium circuits, and another one from Blackout destroyed the weapons console. However, in deactivation, the probe would be avenged, as its wreckage dropped on Crosscut's head with an audible clank, denting his helmet and knocking him out.

Cobalt rushed up to Crosscut and began to examine him. He backed off with relief when he realized that Crosscut was in a stable condition. "He's okay, Ultra Magnus, but I have to excuse him from activities for the rest of the day. That probe hit him hard."

"Very well, Mayday, You'll have to take Crosscut's place." Magnus decided.

"Magnus, I don't want to be a Decepticon." Oceancruiser whined. Ultra Magnus had assigned them to teams acting out the parts of the Autobots and Decepticons. The Decepticon team was to make sure that they were not found by Autobots and to avoid "capture" at any cost. The Autobots were to find the Decepticons using any methods necessary. Of course, all the weapons were set on stun, so no one would be too badly damaged. Oceancruiser, for some reason, always got to be on the Decepticon team during these simulations.

"Don't worry, Oceancruiser. I'll trade with you." Mayday suggested.

"Thanks! I finally get to be an Autobot!" Oceancruiser made a victory sign.

"The Autobots consist of Oceancruiser, Fastlane, Blackout, Iceberg, Pallas, and Torpedo. The Decepticons consist of Windshear, Mayday, Cobalt, Nightscream, Double-header, and Flower Wagon. Now that the teams are decided, begin the simulation."

"The most efficient way to escape from the Autobots is to split up. Decepticon, remember, your mission is to avoid capture, not to provoke the Autobots. Fight only when there is no other option.' Windshear advised.

"Shouldn't we be in groups? These woods could be dangerous." Double-header speculated.

"You have a point, Double-header. I will be in a team with Flower Wagon, Cobalt will be with Double-header, and Nightscream will be with Mayday."

"Whoa there, hold the phone!" Nightscream saw all the cadets staring at him strangely. "It's a human saying. It means wait a second. I'm not going to be partnered with anyone: I like it better alone."

"That's alright with me." Mayday voiced her consent.

"If that is the case, you two can work alone. Be careful." Windshear took one last look at her team. "Now, let's win this game."

Meanwhile, Oceancruiser was leading her team around the forest. They had decided to stay together so they could be a more formidable fighting force. Oceancruiser, who had experience dealing with her best friend, decided that the Decepticons were probably spread so thin they would be easy too hunt down.

True to Oceancruiser's predictions, Cobalt and Double-header were quickly located. They had painted themselves in camouflage colors and attempted to blend in with the forest. Unfortunately, they forgot about Oceancruiser's radar. When they were apprehended, Double-header attempted to resist by chucking a tree at the Autobots. Gunfire from six weapons shattered the makeshift projectile. Recognizing their disadvantage, the two "Decepticons" surrendered.

Nightscream was next. He got tired of hiding in a tree and tried to jump the Autobots. Unfortunately for him, he timed his moves wrong and ended up landing on Pallas' shoulders in such a way that he was sitting facing back and she was facing forward, her face between his legs. They stumbled around like that for a while until Pallas grabbed his legs and threw him off. Nightscream rolled up and drew his wing blade, only to be countered by Iceberg.

"We will fight honorably, until one falls." Iceberg stated calmly.

"You're too serious. This **is** just a training exercise." With that, the two began fighting.

Nightscream swung his blade at Iceberg, but she blocked it. Nightscream threw his weight on his sword, pushing Iceberg back. However, Iceberg lashed out and kicked him in the shin. While Nightscream fell to one knee, Iceberg pursued her advantage by kneeing him in the cockpit. Nightscream pulled away at that instant, causing Iceberg to fall on her face. He then sat on her waist and pulled her arms up, restricting her movement. Iceberg rolled around so she was on top of Nightscream and slammed the back of her head into his nose. Nightscream was knocked out immediately.

"Where did you learn those cool moves?" Fastlane asked in amazement.

"Saturday night wrestling shows." Iceberg seemed not to care about the looks the other cadets sent her.

The last ones to be discovered were Windshear and Flower Wagon. Flower Wagon willingly surrendered, but Windshear would not give up without a fight. When the "Autobots" charged her, she fired off her guns Blackout, Pallas, and Torpedo were thrown away. Oceancruiser, Pallas, and Iceberg clung on, but they were thrown off when Windshear transformed and took to the air. Oceancruiser activated her own rockets and gave chase.

"Forget it, Oceancruiser. I'm a jet, you're a ship. Who do you think is going to win in a dogfight?" Windshear teased.

"The one who knows jet judo." Oceancruiser tackled her friend and clung on to the jet's wings. "Sorry, Windshear, but Sideswipe and Sunstreaker have been giving me some pointers." She threw her weight into Windshear's nosecone, pushing the jet into a downward pattern.

"I'm sorry, but the Aerialbots have been giving **me** pointers." Windshear pulled up at the last second and began spin at her highest speeds. "Five guys as opposed to two guys; who do you think has the advantage?"

"In this game, it's not about quantity—it's about quality." Oceancruiser rolled along with Windshear's spin cycle, hanging on the whole time.

"I would like to assure you that the twins possess neither advantage. All they're good for is pulling those annoying pranks." Windshear descended to near ground level and flew into the trees.

"They might have neither quality nor quantity, but they have one thing you don't—imagination!" Oceancruiser lowered her head bit Windshear on her non-detachable left wing.

Windshear howled and tilted to the left, attempting to shake off Oceancruiser, who was biting on for dear life. This caused her wing to jam into the dirt and send Windshear to a stop, stuck diagonally in the earth.

"See? I told you—Lamborghinis beat planes hands down!" Oceancruiser petted Windshear on her cockpit. "Don't worry, we don't torture our prisoners. Well, except for the occasional tickle torture." She flicked on her com and contacted Iceberg. "This is Oceancruiser. I've captured the last Decepticon."

"Not the last—Mayday's still out there."

"The rest of you watch the prisoners. I'm going to find Mayday. I always wondered what it would be like to fight her one on one."

"This is so slagging stupid." Oceancruiser pushed her way through the foliage. "Where could she be? No one could hide for this long without alerting everyone."

Oceancruiser was stopped in her tracks by a horrific discovery. Mayday was lying on the forest floor, hideously mutilated. She had been disemboweled by a slash to the torso, and the exposed circuits and veins were torn apart with savage ferocity. One arm had been twisted around so many times it looked like a washcloth someone had just wrung out. Both of the wings had been torn off at the shoulder. Slashes from something that looked like claws decorated every inch of her body.

"Guys, I found Mayday." Oceancruiser contacted the rest of the cadets after taking one look at the spectacle.

"You sound scared. Is Mayday okay?" Cobalt asked, his voice filled with concern.

"Define 'okay.' If it means 'horribly mauled, but still alive,' then she's okay. If it means 'completely unharmed,' then she's screwed." Oceancruiser snapped, kneeling down to check Mayday's condition.

"Describe the nature of the injuries."

"Large wounds to the chassis, heavily damaged arm, wings torn off, and minor slashes."

"Focus on the chassis wound first. You need to divert the energon flow to avoid the damaged area."

"How?" Oceancruiser was staring at the large wound, mystified. She had done some emergency repairs before, but not on someone as badly hurt as this. If she were back with the Decepticons, then a case as serious as this would be abandoned on the field, unless the medic or closest warrior was in a merciful mood. Then, the mechanism would be put out of his or her misery with one shot to the spark.

"You reconnect the energon lines to go around the damaged main lines. Basically, you bypass the main lines by reconfiguring the system. Then, you remove the wires with the most damage and perform another bypass."

"I understand, but I don't have and arc welder to reconnect the wires." Oceancruiser responded, looping Mayday's fuel lines around each other in a confusing, but nevertheless life-saving tangle.

"What do you have?"

"I have some electric tape left over from last week's prank, but…"

"Use that, and if it runs out, strafe the wires together."

"Roger dodger, Cobalt." Oceancruiser peered closely to repair the damaged wires.

'I'm worried." Stormcloud was sitting in the Instructor's cabin with Ultra Magnus, her energon high having worn off. "They've bee out there since noon."

"You'll be surprised at how capably they can handle themselves." Magnus muttered.

"They're coming back, but something looks wrong!" Stormcloud bolted from her seat. "I think Mayday's hurt."

Sure enough, Torpedo was carrying Mayday and running to the sickbay. Her entire front side looked like an inadequate plumber had used it for practice. Behind Torpedo the other cadets were all looking scared and angry.

"Ultra Magnus, Mayday was attacked by something and heavily damaged. Oceancruiser was able to perform emergency repairs, but we're not sure how long she can survive. If I were you, I'd be careful, that thing's still around here somewhere." Blackout warned.

Stormcloud clutched her halberd angrily. "I'm going to find that abomination and rip its slagging fuel pump out."

"No, I know who it is. I'll go talk to it." Before anyone could stop him, Torpedo dashed into the forest.

"Warstorm, I know you're around here somewhere! Come out, I need to talk to you!" Torpedo shouted at the trees in front of him.

"How nice, you know me so well, old friend." A femme jumped out of the leaves. She was a heavily armored magenta amphibious tank with golden optics. She had intricate gold and green detailing resembling runes on her arms and legs. She was armed with a multi-missile launcher and plasma cannons. She was armed with claws and fangs even in robot mode. There was a long gash running down her left arm as well a scratches consistent with a fight.

"Warstorm, if you wanted to hurt me, you could have attacked me directly or damaged the people I love. I hardly knew Mayday. Why did you attack her?" Torpedo questioned Warstorm.

"I did it because I got tired of fighting the people you know. I wanted to try new things." Warstorm examined her claws. "Besides, it was in self-defense.'

"Mayday wouldn't attack without reason."

"Okay, so I kinda provoked her a little."

"Tell the truth."

"Okay, so I provoked her a lot."

"She still wouldn't have attacked hard enough to deserve that mauling."

"Okay, so I provoked her by pushing her and telling her that I was the one who murdered all the citizens of the explorer-colony Wuyen."

"How does that relate?"

"Her family was on that colony."

'So she's another survivor? I didn't know that there were others like me. What did she do in response to what you said?"

'First, she survived because I got sloppy. You survived because I wanted you around for my own reasons. Second, her response was to attack me like a berserker. I had to maul her that badly to make her stop."

"Come back with me, Warstorm. We could apologize to Mayday and her teacher."

"Why would I want to do that? She'd kill me the moment I set foot in the cabin."

"You'll do it because you aren't the monster you think you are. If you get everything off your chest, you'll feel much better."

"I'll come with you, but if I get attacked, I'm fighting back." Warstorm followed Torpedo as he turned back.

Stormcloud paced around the cabin anxiously. It had been two hours since Cobalt began to operate on Mayday, but there had been no news. She was worried to death not only about Mayday, but also about Torpedo, who had run off with clarifying anything.

"I'm back, Miss Stormcloud!" Torpedo was running back to the cabin, an unidentified girl in tow.

"I'm Warstorm, the one who mauled Mayday. I've come to—" Warstorm was cut off by a burst of lightning from Stormcloud. "See, I told you she'd kill me."

"Both of you stop. Warstorm sincerely came to apologize. Please listen, Stormcloud." Torpedo jumped between the two females

"What do you know, Torpedo? That thing's nothing but a…" Stormcloud stared at Warstorm in anger.

"What, a monster?" Warstorm interrupted. "I've been called that since the day I was born, and it doesn't even phase me any more. I'm an abomination, a creature that should not have been created! Everyone blames me and calls me crazy. Why don't they blame my creators? They were the ones who created a monster that turned on them! My existence came through no fault of mine, but I'm still hated anyway. It's my creators' fault that I was made and the fault of the general populace that I am insane! Why don't they blame the multitudes of people aboard the colony Wuyen, or all who knew me? They drove me to madness with their cold eyes and harsh words. They knew I existed, but denied me the right to have a life. They are the monsters, not me. What sort of monster cried out in its sleep for some one to love who could love her in return? What sort of innocent person spits on a poor, forlorn little child and scorns her to be an abomination? What sort of creators could look into the eyes of a creation that could only love them and deem her as a failure to be locked away and experimented upon, then terminated when she was of no more value? I was shut in a cage for most of my life and abused and experimented upon. Who could look on the world with eyes of love and innocence when they are treated like that?"

Stormcloud was taken aback by the words that Warstorm had let out. The mechanism she had assumed to be an unfeeling monster had let out all of her emotions in one breath. What the young femme had said was heart wrenching, and Stormcloud now saw her as nothing but a scared little child. "I'm sorry and I'll listen to what you have to say. But being abused does not give you a reason to hurt people."

"I know what you're going to say: 'Look at Nightscream.' He wasn't as abused as I was! At least he was a perfect clone. He was more or less a 'success.' I was the failed experiment, a girl picked up from somewhere injected with the energy of a failed clone, hoping to create something that nobody but scientists could understand. I was taken from the home that I never knew and donated to science. The people who should have loved me betrayed me, and the people I hoped would love me tormented me. I was called an untrained animal and treated like one. There were some guards who would drag Nightscream and me out of our cages just to abuse us, and no one cared. Some even said I deserved it. I murdered everyone in revenge when I busted out, and even if it was wrong I don't regret it. They would have killed me in more brutal ways if they could. Can you imagine a life with no one to care about you? No warmth of a family, or friends, or even a mate. That was the life I lived, and I didn't even get adopted like Nightscream." Warstorm countered. "Just for the record, Nightscream killed more people than I ever did at Megatron's orders. He's not as innocent as you think."

"I'm sorry for thinking nasty things about you." Stormcloud whispered. "I know that Mayday would understand if I explained it to, her, so I could forgive you now if you apologized."

"I'm kinda sorry I mauled your student." Warstorm turned around to see Torpedo staring at her. "Okay, so I'm very sorry and I shouldn't have done it."

"That's better." Torpedo smiled.

"Do you enjoy wringing these confessions out of me or something?" Warstorm snapped at Torpedo.

"If it means cracking that shell you've built around yourself, then yes."

"You're even more twisted than I am!" Warstorm threw up her arms and laughed.

"You poor thing." Stormcloud stroked Warstorm's cheek. "You know, Nightrider and Longshot want some kids of their own, and I reckon they'll want to adopt you and give you the love you need."

"Hold on a second. Do I look like I have 'for adoption' taped onto my chest? If they want a kid so much, tell them to make one. I've got places to go, things to do, and people to meet or kill. I don't have time to be adopted." Warstorm protested. "If my apology's accepted, I'll just leave."

"Apology accepted. You can go. I'll explain this to Mayday when she wakes up. She's strong so I think she'll survive." Stormcloud waved goodbye at Warstorm. I feel so sad for her. She doesn't even know she wants to be wanted. 

"Mayday is in a stable condition right now. Although it took me hours to go through the repairs Oceancruiser made and correct them, I've finished now." Cobalt declared, walking out of the sick bay.

"I told you so." Stormcloud sighed in relief.

"However, you'll have to miss your reunion. Mayday might be alright, but she needs twenty-four hours of rest before she can move around."

Stormcloud shrugged. "It's okay by me. This just gives me more time to catch up on the past with Ultra Magnus. I've got loads of dirt on him."

"Well, if no one minds, I'll be going." Warstorm sauntered over to Torpedo and kissed him on the cheek, causing the submarine to glow bright red with embarrassment. "When next we meet, things won't go as smoothly as they have today." She whispered as she walked away into the forest.

"So, can you dish out the dirt on Ultra Magnus? We love to tease him!" Oceancruiser popped out from behind Stormcloud.

"Well, there was this time…" Stormcloud proceeded to launch into an embarrassing tale of Ultra Magnus and a monkey wrench.

The setting sun coated the forest, as well as the tank driving through it bright gold. Warstorm was setting out for somewhere that she did not have a specific name for yet. Like always, it would be random luck where she ended up, which was good for her since she could not tell directions to save her life anyway. Today's encounter with Torpedo had strangely relaxed, not excited her. It was as if a certain weight had been lifted from her chest, so she now had all the time in the world to enjoy and/or wreck nature's bounties. As she transformed to look up at the sunset, she whispered one last, albeit temporary, farewell to Torpedo.

"Until next time, **old friend**."


	6. Party

Mayday awoke with a start in the morning. What had happened to her previously seemed like just a dream, but the throbbing pain in her chassis served to remind her that it was all real. The monster that had killed her family had come to her, and she had found herself an inch away from death.

"Mayday, you're awake." Mayday looked up to see Ultra Magnus standing by her bedside.

"Ultra Magnus, I'm sorry for being stupid enough to get hurt like this." Mayday balled her hands up into fists. "But that…abomination can't be allowed to hurt anyone ever again!"

"Mayday, Warstorm may be the enemy, but she's not that sparkless. She came in and apologized yesterday at Torpedo's suggestion. I won't pretend to know what happened between you two, but I think that there was a misunderstanding."

"Magnus, she murdered my family. They didn't do anything wrong. They were just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"You're right. Warstorm was berserk at the time. She didn't know who was who. All she saw were the people who refused to give her the love she needed. It's time you accepted that apology and got over what happened, because there is no place for a personal vendetta on the battlefield. If you got lucky, you killed the bastard during combat; if you weren't lucky you had to wait for another time." Magnus explained calmly. A desire for vengeance against another person only hindered a Cybertronian's fighting abilities. To be consumed by that emotion and focus on one mech alone caused said Cybertronian to not notice all the other fighters. Ultra Magnus couldn't even list all the hundreds of times he had seen soldiers gunned down in battle, seeking a revenge that they had never reached and would never reach again.

"Thanks for the pointers. I guess I'll try to forgive her, but I don't know if I can." Mayday whispered. The murder of her whole family was a tough thing to forgive.

"Enough talk, cadet. Get to the mess hall before breakfast hours are over." Ultra Magnus turned and marched away.

The first thing that greeted Mayday's optics was the sight of energon everywhere. Apparently, the other cadets had decided to have a food fight in Ultra Magnus' absence. Oceancruiser, Nightscream, Fastlane, Iceberg, and Double-header were on one side, while Stormcloud, Cobalt, Blackout, Pallas, and Crosscut were on the other. Windshear, Flower Wagon, and Torpedo were hiding under a table, begging for the chaos to end.

"Take a taste of my new energon pellets!" Crosscut stuffed his energon into his acid guns. His first shot was able to nail Double-header in the face. "Yes! Right in the kisser! I love how violent this is, although we'll probably lose…"

"Of course you'll lose—you're fighting against me!" Double-header had a pile of energon next to her and was chipping them, one at a time, at Crosscut.

"Energon bombs, away!" Nightscream transformed into plane mode and plopped energon on Blackout's head. Blackout returned fire by throwing a cube a Nightscream's cockpit, which smudged his windows and forced him to land. Next to her, Cobalt was playing catch with Iceberg using an energon cube. Every time Cobalt threw something, Iceberg caught it and threw it back.

"Everyone's gaze focused on the baseball player. This pitch would decide the outcome of the game." Fastlane brought himself in to a pitcher's pose and threw the energon cube. It smacked into Pallas' chest, throwing her back a few steps. "Yes! Strike three! She's out."

"Actually, I'd rather call that one a ball." Pallas stood up and pelted Fastlane with her own energon cubes. Fastlane dodged, causing them to hit Iceberg instead. Iceberg snapped back and chipped an energon cube at Pallas, striking the unfortunate girl on the head. Pallas was instantly knocked out by the impact.

"I've always wanted to fight you, although this was not what I was expecting." Oceancruiser stood, facing Stormcloud.

"You already fought me when you were possessed, but you don't remember. Needless to say, I plan on winning this time." Stormcloud eyed her opponent carefully. Both clutched their energon cubes tightly, knowing that being off by even one degree would mean defeat.

When the moment came, both fighters jumped at each other and threw their energon cubes. Both cubes seemed ready to hit their targets, but Oceancruiser dodged Matrix-style at the last moment. Stormcloud, however, had slower reflexes and was knocked down by the force of the energon cube that had hit her. Oceancruiser walked up to her fallen opponent and made a victory sign. Stormcloud, who was still conscious, took this opportunity to subdue the cadet and tickle her mercilessly.

Windshear gasped as she saw Ultra Magnus and Mayday. Taking two glances out to confirm that the coast was clear, she jumped out from beneath the table. "I have an announcement to—Ack!"

The teams of food fighters stopped in the midst of what they were doing and stared at Windshear. Apparently, no one had noticed Windshear getting out, so she had gotten caught in the crossfire. Now, as she stood there, energon covering her face, Iceberg was not the only one who sensed her aura of rage.

Windshear jumped onto a table and blew a coach's whistle as hard as she could. "Each and every one of you may stop what you are doing and sit down, **now**." Windshear focused her death-glare on all of the food fight participants. Instantly, everyone quieted down and sat in their chairs, which had been restored to the original, upright positions. The only sound that could be heard was Crosscut's whimpering and Annie's hissing.

"I have an announcement to make. Since this is Mayday's last day here, we have decided that Oceancruiser should show her some of our outdoor recreational activities. Stormcloud, Ultra Magnus wants to show you some nice spots around the camp, **alone**." Windshear tapped her spoon against an energon glass to get everyone's attention.

"This is so great, Mayday! We finally get to hang out! It's not that it wasn't nice the last two days, but the Goop really put a damper on things." Oceancruiser half carried, half dragged Mayday out of the mess hall.

"Well, it seems the kids want some privacy." Stormcloud began to get up. "Come on, Magnus; let's leave them to their own devices."

As soon as Ultra Magnus and Stormcloud were out of their range of vision and hearing, the cadets began to plan for whatever scheme they had concocted. When they were done, Windshear, still covered in energon, blew the whistle.

"Everyone know their positions? One, two, break!"

"So, what do you want to do? There's badminton, basketball, and rock climbing! Let's enjoy all nature has to offer us!" Oceancruiser happily ranted about all the sports they could play.

"I think we should go swimming." Mayday replied uneasily. She was lying in Oceancruiser's arms while the destroyer soared through the skies. Mayday was trying not to look down, as the sigh scared her. Although she was perfectly capable of flying independently, seeing the same things while held in someone else's arms unnerved her.

"Okay, I see a lake straight ahead! Thank you for flying the Oceancruiser express! Keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times until the pilot dismisses you." As Oceancruiser nosedived toward her target at dizzying velocities, Mayday shut off both her optics and prayed that she would not vomit.

The two travelers arrived safely at the lake, where Oceancruiser produced two fishing poles and a fisherman's hat big enough for a transformer. When asked where she had acquired it, Oceancruiser just answered that she had asked Bluestreak, who had asked Jazz, who had asked Sideswipe, who pulled some strings. Of course, Oceancruiser didn't know anything about Sideswipe's secret dealings, although Red Alert and Blackout often accused the younger Lamborghini twin of doing business with Decepticons. With the question of the hat now settled, the two cadets settled down to begin fishing.

"This place doesn't look too bad." Stormcloud lay down on the soft grass and stared into the boundless blue sky. "The cadets are planning something, aren't they?"

"What gives you that idea?"

"Don't give me that face, Ultra Magnus; I've known you since this war started. The only ones who knew you for a longer time were Prime and Elita-One." Stormcloud pointed at Ultra Magnus accusingly. "You're a horrible liar—it shows right on your features."

"Okay, I admit it. Oceancruiser and I were to distract Mayday and you until the rest of the cadets could get everything ready for a surprise party." Ultra Magnus confessed.

"That's so sweet. They must be a pleasure to hang out with."

"They annoy the slag out of me. Sometimes I think their goal in life is to drive me crazy."

"Come on, you don't mean that. After all, you're going to have a family of your own one day." Stormcloud turned to Magnus. "Are you seeing anyone right now?"

"No. Duty always comes first."

"Of course duty comes first—duty to your family, and your own chance at love. Now that the Decepticons have been all but eradicated, you can have a love-life again."

"My love life is nonexistent; it's always been nonexistent."

"You're still young. You just need to look around, go on some dates, and then settle down with the one you think is right for you."

"Will they be blind dates? I've been weaned of those things by all the times that Orion tried to play matchmaker."

"Were Optimus' decisions really that bad?"

"Don't get me wrong. Prime was a great leader, but his choice in femmes sucked. Ariel was the only good judgment he ever made. As for the others, especially the ones he tried to set me up with, just thinking about them send a chill up my spine."

"Yeah, I remember that. There was one time you ran into my quarters and hid in the closet till morning, muttering something about your date being a monster. Did you or didn't you have your pants on at that time?"

"I had no pants on. That crazy femme claimed them as her war prize or something. I barely got out of that situation with all limbs intact."

Upon hearing this clarification, Stormcloud could not suppress her mirth any more and burst out laughing. "Sorry, but those blind dates were so funny! I hope you find a good femme someday; one who doesn't try to take your pants."

"When this war is completely over, I will."

Windshear glided over the campsites, keeping a sharp eye out for Oceancruiser. However, she was so focused on the forest that she did not notice the fish flying at her. It struck Windshear in the cockpit, smearing fish gut over her windows. With a cry, Windshear spiraled down, unable to see.

"Windshear, are you okay?" Oceancruiser and Mayday loomed over the plane, obviously worried.

"I was alright, until this aquatic projectile impacted with me. Do you have any idea where this came from?" Windshear peeled away the sad remains of the fish.

"Well, that's a funny story. Mayday and I were fishing, but we couldn't find anything. So, I jumped into the water to grab a fish, but it was just too strong. I struggled with it, but in the end I just had to throw it away." Oceancruiser grinned sheepishly.

"Be more careful next time. I have things to do back at camp, so I'll be going. Enjoy yourselves." Windshear transformed back into plane mode and flew away.

"So, what do you want to do next?" Oceancruiser was practically bouncing with excitement.

"I want to go eat a picnic lunch…" Mayday suggested bashfully.

"Let's go then! I know the perfect spot!"

"This is Red Eagle to base. Tiger Shark and Big Momma have lured away the suckers. Indy Champion, do you copy?" Windshear's voice crackled over the communicator.

"Roger that. Red Eagle, our plan is proceeding perfectly. Rustface and Sweet Cheeks are securing the western perimeter while Miss Anal and Ice Cube are securing the eastern perimeter. Depth Junior, Ninja Girl, and Depraved Goth are checking out the music samples for the dance. Blue 42, Dumb Hippie, you, and I will be responsible for the refreshments." Fastlane replied.

"I understand, Indy Champion, but this is the last time I let you pick the names. Seriously, some are just juvenile."

"Roger that. Indy Champion out."

"So, it's just the two of us." Double-header leaned against Nightscream.

"We were assigned to the same group as Blackout and Iceberg." Nightscream was stringing decorations on the tables.

"I know, but they're decorating the other side of the camp." Double-header squatted down so she was level with Nightscream. "It's just us now. We don't get chances to be alone together very much now."

"If you still harbor any feelings for Starscream, I suggest you flirt with the original. I'm not Starscream, and I never will be. If you think I'm exactly like, you're in for some serious disillusionment." Nightscream pulled away to work on the other side of a table.

"I already got over Starscream. I could have had something with him, but he never noticed me." Double-header inched over toward Nightscream.

"So what you're saying is that I caught you on the rebound." Nightscream turned his face away from his partner.

"I didn't say that. I might have tried to use you as a substitute in the past, but now I like you for you. You're much more caring and receptive than Starscream ever was." Double-header explained, hoping that Nightscream would not take it the wrong way.

"Thank you. I'm glad you like me the right way, and not just for whom I resemble. But if you ever had a choice, would you pick Starscream or me?" Nightscream smirked.

"Of course I'd pick you, dummy!" Double-header playfully thumped her partner on the back. "Still, I wonder why Starscream never noticed me."

"If I'm a perfect clone, then how he thinks should be something like how I think. So I think it's because Starscream just loves challenges. He would have liked you if you were stronger than he was, and if you were somewhat indifferent to him because you were pursuing your own ambitious goals. He also likes the aggressive type, such as those who love the power they have and aren't afraid to use it to dominated everyone they interact with." Nightscream tried to explain. He really wasn't sure what Starscream liked, but that was his secret ideal woman. He never told anybody about it, because he would probably be ridiculed. However, he was pretty sure that was what every Decepticon called their dream women. In fact, Nightscream had once heard Swindle say he "would like to get with a strong female who would hogtie anyone who eyes her sideways."

"So, to make myself attractive to you I have to play a strong, ambitious, and hard-to-get dominatrix? Cool, I'm in." Double-header cracked her knuckles.

"You're too much of a good girl to ever pull that off." Nightscream scoffed.

"No I'm not. Watch this." Double-header picked up a length of ribbon, which she used a whip, and struck a Betty Page pose.

"Anyone can strike a pose. You don't have the power to back that up."

"I'll show you power!" Double-header cracked her ribbon on the ground and charged forward.

"Get your foot out of my face!" Blackout yelled. She was supporting Iceberg as the latter hung decorations around the roof of a cabin.

"If you desire that, then you can hang these streamers."

"No thanks. My arms aren't long enough."

"If that is the case, then go with another group."

"No way." Blackout snapped. "Who knows what you'll do if you're left unguarded, traitor."

"I was a spy; there's a difference. I was an Autobot all along, posing as a warrior and communications aide for the Decepticons." Iceberg stoically rebutted.

"I don't care. You could have been corrupted by Decepticon philosophies during your time with them."

"Don't worry. I won't defect anytime soon." Iceberg reassured, seeming cheerful, but her face was out Blackout's line of sigh, so it was hard to tell whether or not she was smiling.

"When you do, my gun is going to be waiting for you." Blackout grinned.

"I've always wanted to go up against your machine gun with my sword; which do you think will win?"

"The one that can blow off an opponent's head." Blackout whipped out her gun as Iceberg jumped down to the ground. "How crazy do you think you are?"

"Craziness is in the eye of the beholder." Iceberg turned around to go inside.

"If you really are as crazy as you seem, stick this gun in your mouth and fire it."

With lightning fast reflexes, Iceberg whipped around, grabbed the machine gun, and fired it into her own mouth. However, nothing happened, as the gun was a blank. Iceberg threw the gun back into the hand of its petrified owner and sauntered away, calm as usual.

"You're crazier than you look." Blackout clenched her gun nervously. "Thank goodness I took all the charges out before I challenged you."

"I knew that all along. Now it's your turn. I dare you to get on the roof and jump down."

"No." Blackout frowned at her friend.

"Good call, you're smarter than I am,"

"So, does anyone have any idea about what to serve for refreshments?" Windshear was recording things on a clipboard.

"We need drinks…" Flower Wagon proposed.

"We should have pudding!" Fastlane yelled.

"Of course, Flower Wagon. We will serve energon soda as a beverage." Windshear logged the choice onto the clipboard.

"We should have pudding!" Fastlane yelled again.

"We should have some cookies." Cobalt suggested.

"I'm making a note of it, Cobalt." Windshear put down another idea.

"Pudding!"

"I bet the others will like cheese sticks."

"I recommend that we give out some organic fuel, like ethanol."

"Thank you for your contributions. We have all we need for a fun party." Windshear turned to gather the ingredients to make the refreshments.

"Why can't we have pudding?" Fastlane pouted.

"Fine, we'll have pudding too." At Windshear's declaration, Fastlane immediately cheered up.

"Which one will it be: Jazz music or Heavy Metal music?" Torpedo held two CDs in front of his face and turned to his partners.

"Heavy Metal!"

"Jazz!"

Both of the cadets shouted their choices at almost the same time, thus making it impossible to know who was first. The two competitors decided that the only way this was going to be solved was a staring contest.

"Guys, may I suggest a compromise?" Torpedo nervously proposed.

"What's that compromise about?" Crosscut raised an optic ridge.

"We have mostly hip-hop, but we'll mix in selections of both Jazz and Heavy Metal. Does that sound like a deal to you?"

"As long as you don't show anything vulgar, I'm in." Pallas agreed.

"If that's settled, we can call the others and tell them we've finished choosing."

"This is Depth Junior to Big Momma; Big Momma, do you copy?" Torpedo's voice blared over the communicator.

Stormcloud broke out into giggles. "Big Momma, your code name is Big Momma!"

Ultra Magnus stared back, not amused at all. "This is Big Momma. State your message."

"Our duty has been completed and the east perimeter secured. I'm checking the status of the other teams right now."

"I understand, call back when preparations have been completed." Ultra Magnus shut off the com and turned toward Stormcloud. "Fastlane chose the names, okay?"

'Yeah, but they're still funny."

Double-header stood back to admire her handiwork. Nightscream was on the ground, hogtied with ribbon. It had been a tough fight, but it was also fun. In the end, Nightscream had been no match for her ribbons and super-strength.

"All right, I get the point. Now untie me." Nightscream yelled up at Double-header.

"Let you go after you said I'd never pull this off? No way in the pit." Double-header pulled Nightscream's head up by his chin. "I'm gonna have to punish you to show I can pull it off."

Half of Nightscream's mind was quacking in fear, but the other half was trembling with delight. Until now, such an event was limited to the shadowy realms of his fantasies and/or nightmares. Therefore, when the comlink activated and interrupted Double-header, his body tensed in nervousness.

"Yeah, I'm done. Just give me a second to clean up." Double-header turned toward her intended victim. "It seems I won't be punishing you after all."

Nightscream sighed, half in disappointment and half in relief. There were more important things to focus on other than his perverted fancies. When Double-header removed his bonds, he sprang up and dashed out of the door, but not before kissing his partner on the lips first.

"I'll never wash my face again." Double-header whispered.

"Is it supposed to be that color?" Cobalt and Fastlane stood over their concoction. The pudding, ethanol, cookies, and cheese sticks were relatively easy to procure, but Windshear had insisted that the energon soda be made by the cadets. Thus, the four sat down to create a mixture that none had ever made before

"Let me try." Flower Wagon scooped up a cup and tasted it. Before long, he was bouncing off the walls.

"Blue 42, are you done with your mission?"

Cobalt glanced back at Windshear and Fastlane attempt to restrain Flower Wagon. "As soon as Flower Wagon calms down, we'll be done."

"What a surprise, meeting you here." Stormcloud called toward Oceancruiser as the two pairs headed back toward the cabins.

"Yeah, really cool coincidence, huh?" Oceancruiser called back.

"Well, I'm glad you got to do all those fun things too." Mayday smiled at her teacher.

"Come on, guys, let's go in. The others have a surprise planned!" Oceancruiser skipped to the door and threw it open.

"Surprise!" The other eleven cadets popped open party crackers and threw confetti eggs. Stormcloud seemed to enjoy it, although Mayday just stared forward in confusion.

"Come on, don't just stand there. This is your goodbye party!" Oceancruiser took the initiative and dragged her friend in.

After two hours of partying, during which Stormcloud, Oceancruiser, and Fastlane got hyper off the soda, it was time for Mayday and Stormcloud to return to their original base. Of course, they had to wait for one more hour for everyone to calm down, giving the non-hyper ones more time to play DDR. Torpedo found out the hard way he was allergic to cheese, while Double-header played dominatrix again, but was stopped by Ultra Magnus. Pallas had one dance with Crosscut, another with Cobalt, and the last with Flower Wagon, causing Mayday to dub her the most popular girl in the camp. Ultra Magnus was whirled around in a slow dance by the hyperactive Stormcloud, which caused Nightscream to tease him mercilessly. However, the seeker was stopped by threats of cleaning the floor with a toothbrush for a week.

"This was all very fun, but we have to go back now. My comrades would be worried if I stayed any longer." Stormcloud explained.

"Take care of yourself." Ultra Magnus stiffly shook hand with his former companion.

"You take care of yourself. Make sure to find some way to improve on your love life!"

"I have no love life."

"That's the biggest load of cow turd that's ever been shoved in mah audio. Of course you have a love life; it's just in stasis."

"Maybe, but that's not the point. Just…good luck on your new job. I hope you find a guy who'll be better to you than…"

"That's all in the past. We were all young back then, and I'm over it. Goodbye, Ultra Magnus, and good luck to you too."

While the adults were reminiscing, the cadets were carrying out their own conversation. Everyone was bidding goodbye to Mayday and wishing for her to come back soon. Mayday, of course, was a little overwhelmed by all the attention.

"Oceancruiser, thank you for always protecting me, accepting into your life, and cheering me up with your eternally happy attitude. Torpedo, thank you for making me see that there are two sides to every story, so now I can be a better person and forgive more easily. Flower Wagon, thank you for always being the mediator whenever something goes wrong. Windshear, thank you for helping me integrate into this camp. Double-header, thanks for giving me style tips." Mayday was thanking each of her new friends in turn. "Cobalt, I want to give you something."

"What is it?" Cobalt leaned close to see what Mayday had. Unexpectedly, she kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you for helping me keep my cool in a bad situation. I always thought you were kind of cute." Mayday explained as a blush formed on Cobalt's face.

"You like him, don't you? The next time you're here, I'll arrange for you two to go some place romantic, alone!" Oceancruiser exclaimed.

"Thanks for the offer, but why do you want to help so much?" Mayday inquired.

"Because I like Cobalt too! He's such a nice, gentle guy! I want him to be happy, and I know you'll make him happy."

"Maybe someone else will too." Mayday looked at Oceancruiser.

"Don't worry, he already broke up with Pallas, and she's with Flower Wagon now. Besides, she wouldn't mind one date."

Mayday giggled slightly. "I didn't mean her, Oceancruiser. I meant someone else."

"Don't worry; you can date him until that someone else comes along. I'll be on your side if there's a catfight, or dogfight." Oceancruiser assured Mayday.

Mayday gave a slight nod as she climbed into her shuttle with Stormcloud. With a roar of engines, the ship took off, leaving the campsite behind. The cadets still stood there long after the shuttle left, waving at the night sky.


	7. Video

_I wrote this chapter while I was out of ideas. I promise I'll write better next chapter. I own none of the songs mentioned, and their owners are specified in the chapter_

Crosscut was awakened in the morning by the distinctive sounds of some one singing. Turning to his side, he tried his best to ignore the bothersome noise. After a while, the unique clamor of Fastlane singing in Japanese grew more annoying and could not be disregarded any longer. With a roar, Crosscut sprang from his bed and seized Fastlane's neck.

"If you make one more cheep, I will tear out your vocalizer and install it in a blender!" Crosscut's angry threat was supported by the other male cadets, who had also been roused from their slumber.

"While you do that, I'll weld his face to his skid plate!"

"I'll hold him down while you do it!"

"Count me in too."

Fastlane, who was oblivious to the threats hurled at him, continued to sing hyakugojuuichi at the top of his lungs while attempting to imitate the crazy stunts depicted on the popular internet video, despite the fact that the acts were not to be repeated at home. Everyone stuffed their audios and begged to Primus to stop this agonizing noise, but they were ignored. Crosscut wondered for a brief moment if Fastlane was being controlled by an outside force, but dismissed it. Sooner of later, he was going to snap and rip Fastlane limb from limb.

"Please…Primus, if there is a Primus, stop this singing and I'll be a good boy. I'll never play my banjo or flirt with other people's girlfriend ever again." Flower Wagon desperately prayed, but even this was not good enough.

Fastlane was not only singing, but dancing as well. Ever since some one had connected his central processor to albino-black-sheep-dot-com, he was obsessed with singing this song. He didn't notice the pain on his friends' faces, and he didn't want to either. The only thing important to him was singing. Then, out of nowhere, a computer was thrown in Fastlane's face, knocking him out.

Nightscream just stared blankly into his fellow cadets' faces. "What? He was scaring me."

"Is that true? Did someone really download albino-black-sheep into Fastlane's head?" When Torpedo confirmed her suspicions, Oceancruiser fell to the ground, rolling in laughter.

"It isn't that funny. He woke us up three hours early with his music." Crosscut grumbled. "I just know my joints are going to ache from lack of sleep."

"Don't see your life a glass half empty, be happy! We've got another day of fun ahead of us!" Double-header slurped her energon.

"Cadets, today is a special day."

Everybody groaned. "Special day," by Magnus' standards meant some sort of grueling task that the cadets loathed. Crosscut, in particular, wondered what he had done wrong to receive such treatment.

"Today, you will write letters back to the base reporting on your progress. I expect full observations and no foul language. Oceancruiser, Blackout, you will also have to write your five-hundred word essay today." Ultra Magnus passed out datapads to the cadets.

"Why do we have to write letters? That's boring." Nightscream complained.

"You could always run three-hundred times around the campsite."

"I'll anything if I don't have to write that retarded letter." Nightscream snapped. Actually, he was more scared than irritated, since letter writing was not a skill taught to Decepticons. Back when he had been on with Megatron, it was a matter of survival. All he was good for was to run onto the battlefield and slaughter Autobots in the confusion, or accomplish a certain task while other Decepticons kept the enemies busy. Then, when he got back to base, he took his energon and went back to his small, cramped quarters on the lowest level, where he was not expected to emerge from unless called.

"You interact with the other Decepticons? Don't make me laugh, Nightscream. You are a secret weapon. No one can know of your existence, or we'll lose our edge. Then, I'll have to punish you. Do you want that?" It was some thing that Megatron had said. Nightscream bitterly recalled when he had heard Megatron's answer to his question about when he could be allowed to associate with the other Decepticons. The worst thing about that memory was Megatron's semi-paternal tone, and Nightscream's own silent acceptance of his fate. Due to that order, Nightscream had never learned how to properly communicate with others, even on a written level.

"Does anyone else want to run laps instead of writing letters?" Ultra Magnus asked. Except a few grunts, the cadets did not protest.

Oceancruiser growled when she realized that he had no more ideas. Silently, she counted her words. When she found that she was short ninety-nine words, she slammed her head on her desk in frustration. "Hey, Blackout, do you have any ideas?"

"No."

"Come on, just give me a hint. I'm short ninety-nine words."

"Write your own essay, traitor."

"I'm begging you. Give me an idea." Oceancruiser stopped whining when Blackout slipped her a note.

"Evaluate your own incompetence," was written on the pad. Oceancruiser crumpled it up and threw it at Blackout's head. Blackout returned fire with her pen, hitting Oceancruiser on the chest. With a roar, Oceancruiser jumped at Blackout, attempting to strangle the other cadet. Instantly, the skirmish turned into an all-out fist fight, with the other cadets watching and making bets on the side. One of Oceancruiser's punches strayed and almost hit Fastlane, prompting him to try and join the fight. However, Windshear pulled him back to his seat and held him down firmly.

"Both of you stop. Blackout, sit in one end of the room, and Oceancruiser, sit in the other. If either one of you are caught fighting again, I'll have you scrubbing toilets until tomorrow morning. Do you understand?" Ultra Magnus barked, pulling the two apart.

"Yes, sir." The two cadets exchanged angry glares went to their assigned seats. An eerie silence filled the room while every one was busy writing.

Windshear had finished her letter, and she was now proofreading it. So far, there had been no errors, but one could never be too careful. Her letter, if it had been seen by anyone, would have resembled a full-scale report more than a simple letter. It talked about all the training exercises, whether or not there was improvement, and Stormcloud's visit. Even Perceptor could have looked it over and found nothing wrong, since Windshear seemed to take everything seriously.

Fastlane, meanwhile, had scribbled down something that seemed to unintelligible gibberish. There was no organization, no vivid diction, several errors in every subject imaginable, and a lack of punctuation and spacing. In short, it was every English teacher's nightmare. Thankfully, Fastlane was writing to Blurr, the only robot capable of thinking on the same erratic levels. Everyone, except the two in question, considered this a dubious honor. As for Fastlane and Blurr, they didn't give three bags of guano what everyone else thought.

Cobalt was methodically attempting to inscribe the most eloquent letter he could think of. Every second word seemed to be indecipherable to the mind of a regular Autobot. Since his letter was addressed to Ratchet, Wheeljack, and the other Autobots who were experienced in higher-level sciences, he had to sound smart. Hopefully, Highbrow would not call him a "mediocre excuse" again. The last time that had happened, Oceancruiser had pounced on the offending Headmaster and taught him to not insult her friend—with her fists, of course. To add to the embarrassment, Cobalt was the one who had to repair Highbrow, as Ratchet was currently off duty and sent notice that he was not to be bothered, unless someone desired a vacuum shoved his or her spine.

For Torpedo, it was pretty much the same thing. However, since Brainstorm and Wheeljack were more lenient, he did not have to go to the Pit and back to please his instructors. He was using big, but still coherent words, so his letter could read by anyone. Torpedo had recorded some keen observations of the local wildlife, an accomplishment Brainstorm would be proud of. Having just newly arrived on Earth himself, Brainstorm shared the enthusiasm of his pupil when it came to the study of the native society and ecosystems of the planet. Torpedo smiled to himself as he made sure to include every detail. When he returned to base he would be sure to stop by Brainstorm's office to engage in a discourse about natural studies. Of course, they would have to invite Hound too, since the scout was the current expert on the subject of Earth. According to Wheeljack, the scout's passion was not only limited to studying Earth, but also becoming part of it. Torpedo remembered seeing the green jeep gaze up at the stars with a longing that seem to deceptively be for his home on Cybertron, but actually a desperate yearning to be human.

Iceberg quietly hid her letter from prying eyes. After all, who were they to peek at what went on in her heart? She had a reputation as a cold, mysterious spy, and she wanted to keep that status. It was so much easier to be alone, since she could only work sufficiently in calm atmospheres. Today, Iceberg found herself staring down a severe case of writer's block. There was something brewing just beyond her perception, and she didn't like it one bit. This thought was consuming her mental resources instead of her letter, so she had only written two lines in an hour.

Crosscut was a different story. He was recording down, in vivid detail, the events that had transpired. He made a special note to describe the violence. The only thing he regretted was not being able to see Mayday get mauled, since he had been knocked unconscious by a probe. It was somewhat cheesy, but Crosscut decided some higher power hated him. He was addressing his letter to his sister, Escalade, although he was pretty sure she would just trash it. After all, Escalade was not a sentimental person, unlike several of the older Autobots.

Double header chewed her pencil as she scrambled for an idea. On the one day that she got to write a letter, she couldn't think of anything. She sighed and turned to Pallas and Flower Wagon. "Do you guys have any ideas?"

"No, this year wasn't nearly as fun." Flower Wagon muttered.

"Remember when we had the cooking contest last year?" Pallas interjected.

"Yeah, it was really funny when Torpedo's soufflé caught fire. Wasn't it?"

"It's mean to laugh at him like that, but his reaction was humorously hysterical." Flower Wagon admitted.

"I think it was sad. Everyone wanted to win, but most of us got disappointed." Pallas pointed out.

"You think Magnus will let us have another cooking contest this year."

"You are here to receive combat training, not cooking lessons." Ultra Magnus loomed over the three conversing cadets. "Finish writing your letters and turn them in. Then, you may have the rest of the afternoon off."

Nightscream collapsed back into the meeting hall. "My legs feel like they've fallen off. This camp is bigger than I remembered. So, what's the plan?"

"We're going to do something so outrageous, so random, that it'll go down in prankster history." Oceancruiser had her signature smile plastered on her face. "Okay guys, listen up. Here is what we're going to do…"

Ultra Magnus entered his cabin after filling out the necessary paperwork to mail the cadets' letters. He was just about to go over the local news when he noticed a package on his desk. Upon further scrutiny, it proved to be an average holo-video, wrapped in ribbons with a sign that said "watch me" taped onto one end. Ultra Magnus carefully pressed the play button, wary of anything that could happen.

"Hello there. What you are watching is an Autobot Cadets presentation: Music Video Karaoke 2033!" a hologram of Flower Wagon popped up and cheerfully introduced the content. "This first song, done by Oceancruiser and yours truly is our rendition of a Christmas classic."

"Megatron got run over by a racecar, attacking our base on Christmas Eve." Oceancruiser sang in her cheerful, high-pitched soprano voice. She had a Santa hat on and a wreath of holly dangled around her neck. "You can say there's no such thing as road rage, but as for me and Flower Wagon, we believe. He'd been beating us into pieces, and we couldn't get him to go. Then he was hit until he needed medication, and stumbled out the door into the snow. When they found him Christmas morning, at the scene of the attack, there were tire tracks on his forehead, and incriminating speed bumps on his back. Megatron got run over by a reindeer, attacking our base on Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as road rage, but as for me and Flower Wagon, we believe. Take it, Flower Wagon."

Flower Wagon, also wearing a Santa cap, proceeded to belt out the lyrics. His voice was a husky bass. "Now we're all so proud of Fastlane. He was a little damaged, but he got well. You should have seen him in action; it's a story we now like to tell. It was Christmas without Megatron. The entire base was partying all night. And we couldn't help but wonder: should we destroy his pieces or send them out of our sight? Megatron got run over by a racecar, attacking our base on Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as road rage, but for me and Oceancruiser we believe. Your turn again, Oceancruiser."

"Now the energon is on the table, and no one is in their bed. There's a blue and silver candle, which matched the fin on Torpedo's head. I've warned all of the Decepticons. 'Better watch out for yourselves.' They should never give a license to a cadet that's more insane than an elf. Megatron got run over by a race car, attacking our base on Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as road rage, but as for me and Flower Wagon we believe." Oceancruiser finished her song.

"Our next performer is the one, the only, icon of beauty: Double-header." Flower Wagon announced, sans hat. Double-header emerged from behind a curtain, her face covered in makeup, with a boa wrapped around her body and glitter glistening on her limbs. "Her songs are 'Cradle Song,' by William Blake and 'A Sea Dirge,' by William Shakespeare."

Double-header cleared her throat and sang out in her melodic, soprano voice. "Sleep, sleep, beauty bright, dreaming over the joys of night; sleep, sleep, in thy sleep little sorrows sit and weep. Sweet babe, in thy face soft desires I can trace, secret joys and secret smiles, little pretty infant wiles. As thy softest limbs I feel, smiles as of the morning steal o'er thy cheek and oe'r thy breast where thy little heart does rest. O the cunning wiles that creep in thy little heart asleep! When thy little heart does wake, then the dreadful lightnings break."

"That was a beautiful performance of William Blake's 'Cradle Song.' Everyone clap!" Flower Wagon snapped his fingers a couple of times in a poets' applause. "Her next song will be William Shakespeare's 'A Sea Dirge."

"Full fathom five thy father lies; of his bones that coral made: those are pearls that were his eyes: nothing of him that doth fade, but doth suffer a sea change into something rich and strange. Sea nymphs hourly ring his knell: ding dong. Hark! Now I hear them—ding-dong, bell." Double-header attempted to do a gymnastic routine while singing, but tripped on the flips and became tangled in her boa.

"That was also lovely, but we have to move on to our next act. Put your hands together for Torpedo's presentation of Madonna's 'I Want You.'"

"I want you the right way." Torpedo sang quietly. Despite looking nervous, he did not stutter. His tenor fit the song, despite the fact that the original singer was female. His costume seemed to be taken from Brittney Speares' closet, since it was a black leather bikini. "I want you, but I want you to want me too. Want you to love me, baby, yeah…I will show you love. This is all I can feel. Somehow, someway, I want you, but I want you to want me too." At this point, Torpedo felt too nervous to continue and ran off the stage.

"Well, despite everything being so short, that was still good. Next, it's Crosscut with Janis Joplin's 'Intruder.'"

"You come around here trying to make your demand." Crosscut had a smooth bass voice that would have sent shudders down the spine of any fangirl. He was wearing gothic makeup and spikes on his shoulders. "You've got a need, darling; I've seen is grow and expand. Yeah, you want to reveal my life with your own two hands. Well, tell me now, what are you trying to do? These holes in your life, showing what you require. You need new eyes, oh lord, honey take any wire? Yeah, you've gotta save us all before the next big fire. Tell me now, what are you trying to do?" Crosscut stopped singing for a second and started talking. "That guy she's talking to is one screwed up little glitch."

"How do you know it's a man?" Iceberg called from the background.

"I don't." Crosscut called back. "Walked into my life, child, and I don't even know your name." He began singing again "You put others around behind ya as if they were lame. Now I look like I'm suffering, n-n-n-n-n-n-now I'm doing fine. One look at yourself, baby, child, I've got you alive. Yeah, you're gonna take care of yours, I'll take care of mine. What are you trying to do? Hey!" On the last word, Crosscut attempted to jump into the mosh pit. Unfortunately, since there was no audience, he just landed with a horrible thud.

"While Cobalt stabilizes Crosscut, here is Pallas with 'Oh My Darling Clementine." Flower Wagon announced nervously.

Pallas emerged, dressed in tattered overalls and a straw cap. She started singing in her slow alto while playing Flower Wagon's banjo "In a canyon, in a cavern, where they were excavating a mine, there lived a miner forty-niner and his daughter, Clementine. Oh my darling, oh my darling, oh my darling Clementine. You are lost and gone forever, dreadful sorry Clementine. Drove she ducklings to the water, ever morn at half-past nine. Stubbed her on a splinter, and fell into the bubbling brine. Oh my darling, oh my darling, oh my darling Clementine. You are lost and gone forever, dreadful sorry Clementine. Rosy lips above the water, blowing bubbles mighty fine, but alas, I was no swimmer, so I lost my Clementine. Oh my darling, oh my darling, oh my darling Clementine. You are lost and you're gone forever, dreadful sorry, Clementine."

"Nightscream is our next singer, and he wants to do our theme song in dog language."

Nightscream ran in dressed in a dog costume and started barking. Since his voice was always a subdued screech, he sounded like a dog with his tail caught in a meat grinder. As if trying to torture the audience, he repeated himself over and over for forty-five minutes. When he finally sauntered off the stage, everyone clapped not for his musical ability, but for the song having stopped.

"That was very…unique. Thankfully, Blackout and Iceberg are singing 'Anything You can do I can do Better.' Come on out, ladies."

"Anything you can do I can do better. I can do anything better than you." Iceberg droned. Her voice was, as usual, a monotonous alto.

"No you can't." Blackout snapped. Her voice was a nervous soprano, now seeming even more neurotic because she trying to accentuate her words.

"Yes I can."

"Can you program computers?"

"Better than you can."

"Can you play baseball?"

"Of course, I'm better."

"I bet you can't embroider."

"I can't."

"Ha, anything **you** can do **I** can do better."

"No you can't."

"Yes I can."

"No you can't."

"Yes I can."

"No you can't."

"Yes I can."

"No you can't."

"Yes I can."

"I'm better than either of you!" Oceancruiser popped out of nowhere. Blackout responded to this rude interruption by throwing her microphone at Oceancruiser's head. Thus, yet another fistfight began between Blackout and Oceancruiser. The camera suddenly turned black for a while, but reactivated a minute later, held by Oceancruiser.

"Sorry for the disturbance, but back to the show! Fastlane's going to perform something in Japanese!" Oceancruiser clapped happily.

Fastlane was wearing a silver cape and a pointy, wide-rimmed hat. A mustache was drawn on his face with marker. When he sang, his voice was a tenor, just faintly deep enough to be male. His son was Japanese, with a snazzy pop tune and a cute accompanying dance. Oceancruiser, however frowned as she began to recall what the lyrics meant.

"Fastlane! Get off that stage. If you ever sing that perverted song ever again, I'll feed you your optics! Windshear says that this video is supposed to be PG-13, so you can't sing that." Oceancruiser dragged Fastlane behind the curtain. Some sounds of punching and screaming were heard. Oceancruiser poked her head out when the noises were over, but she looked a little scuffed up. "Our next musician is Cobalt, who is definitely not singing anything vulgar."

"My name is Cobalt, and I'm singing Celine Dion's Beauty and the Beast." Cobalt introduced himself. When he began singing, his voice was a little hoarse, but it eventually mellowed out. "Tale as old as time, Song as old as rhyme, beauty and the beast…"

Oceancruiser started falling asleep, as she did at all music shows. Before she could hit the ground, however, Cobalt stepped in and caught her. "Sorry, but we can't continue on anymore. Our final selection will be Windshear singing the anthem."

"Oh say can you see, by the dawn's early light, what so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?" Windshear had a voice between an alto and a soprano. She would have been a good singer, but she was completely off tune, stressing the unstressed parts and alternating between notes at random. "Whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight; and the rocket's red glare, and the bombs bursting in the air, gave proof throughout the night that our flag was still there. Oh say does that star spangled banner ye-et wave, over the la-a-and of the free-e-e-e and the home of the bra-a-a-ave!"

Cobalt stood reverently throughout the song, his hand over his fuel pump. When it was all over, he leaned into the camera and bid the audience goodbye. "Thank you for watch Music Video Karaoke 2033! Good night!"

Ultra Magnus rubbed his optics and thanked Primus that it was he, and not any other Autobot who had watched the atrocious video. Prowl, in particular, would have passed out. Ultra Magnus gingerly placed the tape in one of his drawers; he would decide what to do with it at a later date. Right now, he needed to vent his stress in a non-harmful manner.

The cadets hooted with laughter when they heard Magnus' stress scream. Even Windshear, who had been against pulling the prank, was giggling. Iceberg, as usual showed no emotion, but Blackout thought there was a ghost of a smile on the other femme's face.

"So, sister, what are we going to do tomorrow night?" Nightscream queried.

"The same thing we do every night: try to drive Ultra Magnus up the wall." Oceancruiser grinned.

The sound of the cadets' laughter could be heard deep within the forest, where someone, unknown to them, was listening. Red optics narrowed in anger and hatred, determined to destroy the owners of the laughter….


	8. Stomach Cramp

_This chapter contains some gross scenes, so I will advise you not to read it before or after eating. Also,if you are and Armada fan, this may offend you. It would be the same if I had written a Beast Wars fic parodying :"Code of Hero," since this parodies the saddest Armada episode. If it does offend you, please flame me with your worst flame. There's no guarantee that I won't flame you back, but at least you won't be cooping it up inside. It is always easier to ask forgiveness tn permission, so please read this and guess who's parodying whom._

In the early hours of morning, the forest was completely quiet except for the sound of birds chirping. Then, the sound of a thousand dying farm animals disrupted the serenity. The origin of this sound was a training camp for Autobot cadets. One of them, named Nightscream, was waking up at this moment, and not feeling too well.

Nightscream woke up with nausea and a stomachache. It was a sensation that made him feel like gagging a couple of times. He dashed to the restroom and leaned over the toilet, but he could vomit out nothing. Deciding that it was just a passing sensation, he joined his fellow cadets in their morning exercises.

Ultra Magnus frowned as he looked at the cadets run. Nightscream, in particular, was lagging behind. "Faster, you little glitches! If you don't take this seriously in battle, you'll be killed."

"I don't feel well." Nightscream snapped.

"I don't care if you feel sick. If you don't get your act together in the middle of a skirmish you won't be feeling anything, because you'll be deactivated."

"I need a break. I feel like I'm going to hurl."

"You have five minutes to lie down and only five minutes." Ultra Magnus decided.

"Blow it out of your exhaust." Nightscream grumbled as he headed into the sick bay.

Nightscream's stomach made a nasty gurgling sound. Technically, he didn't have a stomach—he had fuel cells, but he still felt like throwing up any second. This, added what Ultra Magnus had said about lying down, made Nightscream feel like running away. After weighing his options, Nightscream decided to play hookey instead of staying and being forced to go through back-breaking exercises.

"Goodbye and riddance. I never wanted to come here anyway." Nightscream hopped out of a window and ran into the woods.

Ultra Magnus stormed out of the sick bay. Nightscream had vanished, leaving only an empty cot. There was no doubt about it—the cadet had ditched class.

"The rest of you get back to what you're supposed to do. I'll find Nightscream later, and when I do, I'll drag him back to camp and make him clean the toilets with his face!"

Nightscream was walking along the forest trails when a falling object landed in front of him, knocking the cadet back and creating a crater in the earth. Upon closer examination, the object turned out to be a giant orange hand, several times bigger than Nightscream, severed from the wrist down. Oddly, the hand was brandishing the victory sign with its fingers. Nightscream contemplated it for a long time, and then gave it a kick. Instantly, a wide laser beam shot out from the hand. Nightscream jumped back, so he was not fried. However, that one blast alone was enough to deepen the crater. Quickly losing interest, Nightscream continued walking until he came to a body of water

Nightscream took a deep breath and jumped into the lake. The water felt so cold and wet and refreshing. The heated swimming pools back at the base, which were used for aquatic combat situations, could not even compare to the chilly comfort of the forest lakes. Even though the lake would have been deep for a human, it was just up to Nightscream's knees, so when he sat in it, the water covered his groin area as well. Nightscream gently stroked the water while pondering whether to play around or just sit there. The water felt so enjoyable, and what was summer without swimming? Having made his decision, Nightscream started playing. Laughing like a sparkling, Nightscream cupped some water in his hand and threw it into the air, watching it splash down with relish. Since that did not seem to be enough fun, he wildly thrashed his arms, causing water to splatter.

"Is that who we want?" A voice, not heard by Nightscream, whispered

"I think so, but we should follow him around to ensure we've got the right boy." Another voice hissed back.

After a while, Nightscream grew tired of playing in the water and left to find further stimulation. Taking to the air was impossible, as he would be spotted by his fellow cadets. However, options like fishing or bird watching were still open. Nightscream quickly decided to take a look at the birds and hurried off.

"That boy seems too gentle to be one of us." The second unknown voice observed as he saw Nightscream gently stroke a bird

"Who cares? Can I shoot him now?" The formerly first voice asked.

"No." There was a sound of metal hitting metal, which attracted Nightscream's attention. After seeing nothing there, he shrugged and turned back.

A bird chose this inopportune time to defecate upon Nightscream's head. The angry seeker fried the poor, stupid bird in one shot. A gasp came from both of the unheard voices.

"He really is one of us! Otherwise, he wouldn't even have though of doing that." The second voice exclaimed.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get him!"

Before Nightscream could respond, a sack was thrown over his head, blinding him. Instinctively, Nightscream began to struggle, lashing out with hands and feet.

"Ow, he kicked my shin!"

"Well, he poked my eye!"

"He's hitting my stomach."

"He's stepping on my foot."

"Subdue him!"

"Push him down!" Nightscream was forced down onto the ground.

"Tie him up."

"Riddle him with bullets."

"No!"

"Darn, I'm out.'

"Well, that's good. Leader won't be impressed with us if we got this boy all holey."

"Then what are we supposed to do?"

"Sit on him."

"No way, he just missed my plug by inches."

"I don't have any more ideas. Ow, the twerp's hitting me on the chin."

"Hold on!" The first mysterious robot slammed the butt of his gun into Nightscream's cranium, knocking the young seeker into unconsciousness.

"That's a relief. Now, how do we get him back to base?"

"Don't look at me. I just shoot people."

"I suppose we should carry him."

"You do it. Old Betsy's already damaged enough thanks to him."

"You're the one who hit him with that in the first place."

"I only hit him because you were having trouble. And don't call Betsy inamamade; it hurts her feelings."

"It's inanimate."

"Don't call her that!"

Nightscream woke up in a strange throne room. The roof and floor were metal, but the walls were rock. The broken light fixtures flashed on and off eerily. Several dents were in the walls, obviously because someone had used them for target practice. The centerpiece of the room, the throne, was made out of random pieces of junk, but still held together. A giant robot was sitting in the throne, while five others lined up on either side.

"Finally, you have awakened, Starscream." The robot on the throne, who had spoken, was black with silver accents. He was a head taller than Nightscream, which made him the tallest one in the room. He had heavy shoulder pads and two heavy cannons strapped to his arms. There were gigantic treads on his legs, marking his transformation as a tank. He had a wide black chevron on his forehead, making him look like he had horns. "My name is Magmatron, and you will be my new air commander and second-in-command."

"Hold the phone. My name is **Nightscream**. I'm an Autobot cadet. The only thing that makes me similar to Starscream is the fact that I'm his clone—a fact I absolutely abhor." Nightscream snapped at Magmatron. That mechanism was just another megalomaniacal Megatron-wannabe.

"None of that matters. Compared to you, the rest of my soldiers are bumbling delinquents—not that they aren't already junk-pile rejects." Magmatron dismissed everything with a wave of his hand. "I've observed you for many days, and I've discovered that you are every last bit as competent as the original Starscream, but you also know the concept of loyalty. With such a magnificent soldier on my side, I'll succeed where my cousin failed." Magmatron turned to one of his soldiers. "Wildclench, show your new superior officer his quarters."

"Yes, lord Magmatron." Wildclench bowed. He was a heavily armored Decepticon, with a camouflage green paint job and auburn detailing. There were many guns and cannons attached to his body, so he was probably a front-line warrior. His large limbs and stocky build gave the impression of being very strong. "You, air-commander-dude…"

"The name's Nightscream."

"Night-what's-your-name, follow me to your new quarters."

"No."

"Lord Magmatron commanded me to show you to your room, and I will accommodate him!" With that, he threw Nightscream over his shoulder and walked off.

Nightscream glanced around his new room. Like all other rooms in the base, it was incredibly Spartan. There was a recharger bed in one corner and a desk in another, but that was everything. Obviously, this small branch of Decepticons did not have the resources to build a proper base.

"Are you the new officer?" A young transformer, somewhat younger than Nightscream, appeared at the door. His alternate mode was a dark gray Porsche 935 with blue accents. In robot mode, he was built for speed, so he seemed somewhat skinny. He was twirling around a black handgun, which looked large and heavy. The oddest thing was that his face was bronze yellow, which emphasized his blue-green optics. Like Cobalt, he had two tiny horns on his head. "I don't know if I should be honored or not, since the 'legendary air commander' is living right next door to my quarters."

"You don't need to be honored. I'm not staying for long. Besides, I have a name: it's Nightscream." Nightscream sat down on his recharger bed and motioned the younger transformer in. Said transformer sat down on Nightscream's desk, since there was no chair.

"My name is Steelstreak. I guess I should expect that you're going to leave. Staying with us would seem to be more trouble than it's worth. Magmatron keeps on making new plans and those plans keep on failing. We tried to genetically enhance wild animals to fight for us, but the bear escaped." For a second, Steelstreak got a sad look in his eye, but it went away when he turned toward Nightscream. "I think it's going to be different now. Magmatron has been working on his plan for months, and that project is top secret. I'm so excited about this; more excited than I ever was when I was an Autobot."

"You were an Autobot and you quit to join these weirdoes? What were you smoking?" Nightscream jumped up and exclaimed.

"I did it because they were cool. I have this girl I want to impress." Steelstreak explained.

"If you like that girl, go talk to her and tell her that you like her. If you join a stupid gang like this one, it'll only make your prospects go down. Besides, even if they were 'cool,' you still don't know whether or not that girl would be impressed." Nightscream snapped.

"Look, it's not that simple. First, Sunburst is my childhood friend, so I feel awkward about confessing my love. Second, as we grew up, she got hot and I got geeky. How would she ever choose me over all those good-looking guys who are pursuing her?"

"How do you know she has guys chasing after her? You might be the only one who thinks that she's exceptionally beautiful. Also, those guys, no matter how handsome, probably aren't her type. Go talk to her—it's the best way."

"How do you know? You've never longed for someone."

"No, I haven't." Nightscream smirked. "I'm so attractive that I'm the one the girls long for. However, I once fell in with the wrong crowd, a worse crowd than yours, and it took my sister's encouragement to see that I was too good to be hurting myself by staying with them."

'Maybe I will try to talk with Sunburst." Steelstreak got up and walked toward the door. "But I'm never going back to the Autobots. I've got my Decepticon code to follow." He walked out without even turning back.

The first thing that Nightscream noticed upon walking outside was a purple, spiky Junkion. The junkion had yellow optics, a face mask, and a white helmet that sloped to the sides like horns. He was tinkering around with an odd contraption and speaking into a microphone hooked up to the contraption at the same time.

"Little Salvager to Big Momma Junk. Houston, do you copy." Salvager called. All he received was static, so he started to tweak more knobs.

"What are you working on?" Nightscream peered over Salvager's shoulder.

"A radio device aesthetically fashioned to boldly send our signal where no transformer has gone before.' Salvager responded. This time, jazz music blared over the device. "Oh no, my virgin ears!"

"Hey, did you help in building this base?" Nightscream asked.

"Like, duh, I like, designed this place. Before we came here, we lived the pioneer life in a log cabin."

"No wonder our camp was so messy." Nightscream muttered.

"A day without junk is like a breakfast without sunshine."

"How come you're with these guys? You're a Junkion, which means you're an Autobot."

"I'm a rebel."

"What are you rebelling against?" Nightscream was puzzled. From what he had heard, all the Junkions had to do was watch large amounts of TV, party from day to night, and occasionally listen to Wreck-gar. It was any teenager, TV fan, or party animal's dream. There should have been nothing to rebel against.

"What do you got?" Salvager snapped. Before he could touch his machine again, a stream of gunfire destroyed it.

"Yes! Another machine down, thanks to the beautiful shooting of Blitzquake! Thank you, thank you." A silver and green helicopter transformer appeared. He had bright red optics, set in an orange face. He held a semiautomatic machine gun, with the word "Betsy" painted on its side, in his hands. His helicopter propellers were placed on his back end, making him look somewhat funny.

"How dare you destroy such a beautiful creature?" Salvager was quaking with rage.

"That thing looks better now than it did as that gizmo of yours." Blitzquake cracked.

"Nachuga nala krispa!" Salvager yelled, doing a handstand.

"I don't know what you said, but it sounded like an insult." Blitzquake clenched his fists angrily. "If you want a fight, I'll give it to you." With that, he pounced on Salvager.

"Nightscream, Magmatron requests an audience with you." An unidentified Decepticon, with Wildclench in tow rushed up. The unknown robot was an aqua green and dark purple stealth jet. His optics were red and he had a head shaped like a cone. He was wearing a pink, frilly dress. When he noticed Salvager and Blitzquake, he moved to separate the two. "Stop fighting. You're wasting your energon and making a mess."

"Shut up, Squid-head!" Blitzquake and Salvager both pounced on the unknown jet and began to pummel him.

"Who's that guy?" Nightscream asked Wildclench. Suddenly, the young seeker grabbed his stomach. The nauseous sensation had returned.

"That guy's Laserwing. He's the one who helps Magmatron with the plans."

"He's a tactician, right?"

"If that's what you call him."

"Why is he in that dress? It belongs to my sister's giant teddy bear. She took it off because she thought it was cheesy.

"Really, that was your sister's dress? Laserwing just wears that stuff because he likes to feel pretty."

"That's disgusting."

"Laserwing is weird."

"Okay, let's see what Magmatron wants now. Hopefully, I can stop him from doing anything too stupid." Before Nightscream followed Wildclench, he made sure to stop Blitzquake and Salvager from mauling Laserwing too badly.

"Starscream, you are just the mechanism I wanted to see." Magmatron was standing in front of a widget that resembled a time machine.

"It's Nightscream. What do you want?" Nightscream scowled.

"This project can only be completed with your skills. I plan to use this time machine to travel back to when Unicron attacked Cybertron. Once there, we will destroy the Autobot Matrix before it is opened and leave the Autobots to the mercy of Unicron. Once we destroy the eater of planets, we will conquer Cybertron and then, the entire universe." Magmatron cackled. "Once I rule Cybertron, you will be my right-hand man."

"No. I will not participate in this crazy plan. What if your men are destroyed when attempting to time travel? What if you were destroyed by Unicron in the chaos? Do you even know how powerful Unicron is or how to defeat him?" Nightscream snapped.

"Everything is fodder. This is a risk I'm willing to take. You and Laserwing, being the most competent of my soldiers, are all I need. I don't care less about the rest of those incompetent fools." Magmatron attempted to stroke Nightscream's face, but had his hand knocked away.

"You're disgusting. You don't even know how powerful Unicron is. Recently, Perceptor analyzed data on our galaxy, and it seems that Unicron might be coming back in a new form. When the time comes, Prime is mobilizing every last Autobot and former Decepticon, but we probably still won't be enough. If that's really the case, how will you ever win with so few men?" Nightscream clenched his fists when he saw that Magmatron looked as confident as ever.

"If there isn't a way, I'll make one. Besides, that news was probably false. It's an Autobot propaganda technique to scare you into siding with them. In fact, I doubt that the first attack by Unicron could have caused as much damage as reported."

"How do you know? Were you there to witness the attack?"

"No, I was on a distant planet, searching for some new ore. When I returned, I discovered Autobots had taken over Cybertron. However, the cities all looked undamaged, so I assume that Unicron could not have done as much as the rumors said. Also, Unicron was made by Primacron, a flawed organic. How could a creature like that achieve any sort of perfection? Unicron must have another weakness, aside from the Matrix."

"You're delusional." Nightscream drew his wing blade. "If you cannot change your foolish beliefs, then I will instigate a change in leaders!"

"Interesting. Do you possibly think you could win?" Magmatron smirked.

"I can win and I will win. Mgmatron, I challenge you to a duel for the leadership of your Decepticons. The winner will lead, and the loser will be subordinate." Nightscream stared at Magmatron, wing blade in hand.

"Nightscream, Magmatron is your leader. How dare you speak to him like that?" laser wing rushed up to restrain Nightscream.

"Shut up, Squid-head!" Nightscream slammed his best punch into Laserwing's chassis.

"He learns fast." Laserwing wheezed before passing out.

"What is this awful sinking feeling?" Oceancruiser placed her hand above her spark. "It's weird, like Iceberg's aura sense. I think Nightscream is in trouble."

"I don't know, but these woods could hold anything. We better be careful." Cobalt glanced at his partner. "Don't worry; you know Nightscream can take care of himself."

"Yeah, but I'm still worried."

Nightscream stared intently at his opponent. He did not know Magmatron's power level, but a leader would probably be very powerful. It was better to be cautious in this fight; one wrong move meant that not only would he lose the battle, but his life as well.

Magmatron charged without warning, snapping Nightscream out of his pondering state. The seeker twisted his body to avoid Magmatron's sword and brought down his own blade. Magmatron reversed direction and pushed Nightscream's sword up.

"Why are you acting like this? I thought you were nothing like Starscream." Magmatron inquired while slamming his fist into Nightscream's stomach.

Nightscream stumbled back a bit and then braced himself, ready to charge again. "Even if I hate that bastard, I'm still his clone." He attacked with his sword, slashing Magmatron's face.

"You are taking this seriously, aren't you?" Magmatron's fist came dangerously close to Nightscream's chassis. Nightscream rolled with the punch and hit Magmatron in the forehead with his sword hilt.

Magmatron ducked beneath Nightscream's punch and stabbed his sword forward, but Nightscream flipped over Magmatron. Once behind Magmatron, Nightscream flung his sword toward the Decepticon. When Magmatron ducked, Nightscream slammed a kick into Magmatron's knee. Magmatron whipped around and slammed his elbow into Nightscream's head. Then, he shot a powerful kick toward Nightscream's face.

Nightscream dodged the kick, but he Magmatron's sword above his chassis. For a second, he considered dodging, but that would be what he was expected to do. Oceancruiser had said that in battle, you had to do what the enemy didn't expect. With that thought in mind, Nightscream stopped and offered no resistance as the sword impaled him. Magmatron gasped in shock when he saw the young seeker was smiling, but Nightscream's expression quickly became one of discomfort.

"I think I'm gonna hurl." As soon as he was done saying those words, Nightscream puked. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that he projectile vomited, hurled skyward, or threw **up**. No matter what verb was used, the result was the same—Nightscream barfed in Magmatron's eyes. The Decepticon, temporarily blinded by a mixture of fuel and weak acid, stumbled back screaming. Nightscream used this opportunity to yank Magmatron's sword from his chassis and pick up his own sword. He then placed the swords on either side of Magmatron's neck. "Give up before you get beheaded.

"Well, it seems you have won; but beware, someday, someone will depose you." Magmatron wiped the vomit from his aching eyes.

"I don't care about leadership. I just want you to see something." Nightscream, still holding the swords, pushed Magmatron along the path that they had to take.

"Cobalt, Nightscream's really close, and he's in trouble." Oceancruiser broke into a run. "Hurry up! We have to help my brother!"

"I know you're picking him up on your radar, but how do you know he's in trouble?" Cobalt called out, completely perplexed.

'It's a twin thing!" Oceancruiser called back.

"Hold on, we have to call Ultra Magnus!" When Oceancruiser did not even turn back, Cobalt activated his com and called Ultra Magnus by himself. "Ultra Magnus, we've sighted Nightscream. Oceancruiser says that he might be in trouble." After he completed the call, he followed Oceancruiser into the deeper areas of the forest.

"What in the pit is this thing?" Magmatron's optics widened as he saw the giant orange hand.

"That is a piece of Unicron. It's more powerful than you think." Nightscream walked up to the hand and kicked it. Instantly, the wrist guns enveloped the cadet in a laser beam. Thankfully, the beam ran out of energy and subsided, leaving Nightscream badly burned, but still functioning.

"It seems that you were right, Starscream. It that was but a fraction of a fraction of Unicron's true power, then I seem to have sorely miscalculated." Magmatron admitted.

"How many times do I have to tell you? It's Nightscream." Before Nightscream could say any more, Oceancruiser came barreling through the forest.

"Were you the one who beat up my brother?" Oceancruiser screamed into Magmatron's face.

"Of course I was." Magmatron sneered. When he noticed the evil look in Oceancruiser's optic, it was already too late. She pounced on Magmatron and began to maim him.

"Nightscream, are you okay?" Cobalt asked, bending down to check Nightscream's condition.

"I've got a big hole in my chest and I'm also hungry. Does that sound okay to you?" Nightscream snapped.

"The wound to the chassis will be easy to fix, but there's bad energon in his system." Cobalt turned to Ultra Magnus. "That would excuse his behavior today. After all, he is suffering from food poisoning. You better give him tomorrow off too, since he'll have a twenty-four hour fever."

"I'll excuse you this time." Ultra Magnus bent down to stare into Nightscream's optics. "But if you ever do that again, I'll have you drinking out of the toilets for a year."

Nightscream nervously nodded, or at least he nodded the best he could while lying supine on the ground. "I'll try to tell you if I feel sick."

"Well, since we have this solved, we should be getting back to camp. It will be dark soon, and this forest could be dangerous." Ultra Magnus transformed into his vehicle mode. "All three of you get on in a neat line. There will be no pushing or shoving. Do you understand?"

"Very well, sir." Cobalt placed Nightscream in Ultra Magnus' carrier. "Come on, Oceancruiser, we're going back."

Oceancruiser shrugged and gave the beaten-up Magmatron one last kick in the plug. "If you ever think about doing that to my brother again, I'll mangle you even worse than this time." She noticed Ultra Magnus driving away without her. "Hey, wait for me!"

Oceancruiser chased after Ultra Magnus as the fiery sun set behind her. Magmatron, meanwhile, lay crumpled on the ground in agony. After a while, Wildclench came up to his leader.

"What shall I do? Give me a command and I shall obey, leader."

"Get me back to base, numbskull." As Wildclench carried him back to base, Magmatron reflected Nightscream's decisions. I offered you my trust, and you betrayed me. You're just like your 'father.' But I will have you, one way or another. You will come back to me, Starscream, even if I have to hurt your sister to get you to return. Yes, Starscream—Nightscream—you are mine, forever.


	9. Disease

_This story contains some scenes that may seem grss. Do not read this chapter immediately before of after eating. The next chapter will be about Wind shear and Fastlane, since those two have been ignored lately._

The sun was shining brightly over the campsite. All of the cadets, with the exception of Nightscream, had gone to perform their training exercises. Nightscream was laid up in bed with a fever. He had gotten food poisoning the day before, and he had to wait twenty-four hours before he could do anything.

A hand slowly opened the door to the sick bay. The owner of said hand inched toward the recharge where Nightscream lay. Long fingers reached over and wrapped around Nightscream's shoulder while the figure's face loomed so close that Nightscream could feel its breath. Then, with a sudden, violent jerk, the figure shook him awake.

"Are you hungry, Nightscream?' Oceancruiser asked, her voice filled with concern.

"Just a little bit…I didn't eat for twenty-four hours." Nightscream muttered. For the moment, he felt well enough to eat something.

"That's great, because I brought you breakfast."

Nightscream winced. "Maybe I'll just wait. Your meals aren't usually edible."

"I said I **brought** you breakfast, not **made** you breakfast." Oceancruiser set down her tray of energon soup. "Do you feel good enough to eat by yourself?"

"I'm not a baby, sis." Nightscream took up a spoon of soup and sipped it. "Where is everybody?"

"Cobalt is in the mess hall, doing tests on the energon. Ultra Magnus is monitoring him. The others are all doing training exercises under Windshear's supervision." Oceancruiser explained.

"I think I'm done." Nightscream pushed the rest of his soup away.

"You barely drank half of it." Oceancruiser stared at the bowl.

"I'm not hungry anymore."

"You need to eat and get your energy up. Now eat it before I shove it down your throat."

"Don't push him too hard, Oceancruiser. He's still sick. Any more food will cause him to throw up." Cobalt was standing in the doorway.

"I was just trying to get his energy up."

"I understand. Now, why don't you go out while I run some tests on Nightscream?"

"I can run his tests by myself." Oceancruiser protested.

"Oceancruiser, you can't even take someone's temperature correctly."

"How was I supposed to know it only went up the tailpipe in animals, and you had to use a special thermometer to do it?" Oceancruiser pouted. All she wanted to do was help Ratchet. Instead, she had caused more trouble by putting the thermometer in the wrong place. After that, Prowl and Inferno refused to go into the med bay if Oceancruiser was within a twelve foot radius.

"That's why I'm the medic and you're not." Cobalt sat down and Oceancruiser scooted out the door.

"Are you going to probe me or something?" Nightscream asked. He had heard some of Sideswipe's medical horror stories, so he was doubtful of his safety. Cobalt, with his reputation of experimenting on patients, did not exactly inspire feelings of security.

"I won't do anything except check your recovery. Do you have any symptoms of dizziness?"

"Yes."

"Vomiting?"

"I haven't eaten enough to throw up anything."

"Does your chest hurt?"

"No."

"Any breathing problems?"

"No."

"I think you're good. The fever will wear off in twenty-four hours."

Oceancruiser punched a wall in frustration. "He's been in there for so long! I can't stand the tension."

"It's just a few tests. No need to get so worked up." Ultra Magnus explained.

"I know, but Nightscream is my brother. I couldn't protect him, and that's why I'm frustrated." Oceancruiser turned to Ultra Magnus. "At times like this I just want a shoulder to cry on. Can I cry on yours?"

"Just do it quickly." Ultra Magnus muttered. He didn't expect Oceancruiser to jump on him, bury her head into his chest, and start bawling. Ultra Magnus felt disgusted with the amount of lubricant and stick oil smeared over his chassis. Oceancruiser was also saying some thing, but it was unintelligible when mixed with her sound of weeping. The only thing Ultra Magnus could do to console the blubbering cadet was gently pat her head.

"I never really had a father to hang out with…" The memories of her early childhood only made Oceancruiser cry harder. "Magnus, will you be my dad for a second and comfort me?"

"Sure…" Ultra Magnus felt even more nervous. He had never played the role of a father, and he didn't know how. However, he needed to get Oceancruiser to calm down, and if this was the only way, then so be it.

"Thanks." Oceancruiser started crying even harder, only this time she spliced in some bad memories into her blubbering. Ultra Magnus held her and stroked her back, a maneuver that he remembered seeing Stormcloud use to console upset member of her squad.

When Cobalt came out, the first thing he saw was Oceancruiser, asleep and hiccupping, in Ultra Magnus' arms. Ultra Magnus was gently caressing her hair and telling the cadet that everything was going to be okay. "Did I walk in on a bad time?" Cobalt gingerly asked. The two Autobots seemed to be in the middle of something private.

"No, you're just in time." Ultra Magnus gently pushed Oceancruiser away. "Here, you hold her. I'll go watch Nightscream."

Cobalt nodded and took up Oceancruiser into his own arms. When Oceancruiser was asleep, especially when she fell asleep crying, it was hard to believe that she was a hyperactive and ruthlessly over-protective ex-Decepticon. Instead, she just seemed to be this pitiable little femme that needed a hug and some soothing.

"Everything's going to be alright, Oceancruiser. I checked Nightscream and he's perfectly fine. If you have any worries or things that you need to get out, you can talk to us, okay?" Oceancruiser nodded and made a gurgling sound while curled up in Cobalt's embrace. Cobalt smiled and patted her head.

Ultra Magnus stepped into the sick bay and grabbed a handful of cleaning rags. He needed to wipe the lubricant off his chassis and shoulder. Although he had avoided on pointing it out to Oceancruiser in fear of being mauled, the spectacle was disgusting.

"Hey, did my sister cry lubricant all over you?" Nightscream, lying on his recharger bed, had noticed Ultra Magnus.

"Yes, she did. She also asked me to play her creator for a while."

"Sorry. Oceancruiser's like that sometimes. I've noticed her crying before, but that was always when she thought that nobody was watching. She always tries to be strong for me." Nightscream grinned. "I'm lucky to have a big sister like her."

"I'm here to watch you and make sure that you don't run off again, not to talk about your family." Ultra Magnus sat down next to Nightscream.

"I know. I feel too horrible to run away any time soon." Nightscream turned toward Ultra Magnus. "Could you tell me a story? I'm tired, but I can't fall asleep."

"What sort of story do you want?"

"Oceancruiser would always tell me funny, romantic stories with a happy ending."

"I'll tell you a romantic story, but it isn't funny or happy. There was once an Autobot. He had a girlfriend who was in his unit. They loved each other very much, but there was an obstacle to their relationship. The Autobot had a high position in the military. He needed to focus completely on his job and help the Autobots win the war. Obviously, the Autobot could not be distracted by love at the same time. So, one night, he called her to him and broke off their relationship. The girlfriend was angry; how could she not be? She told him that he would never have another person who would love him ever again, and her words proved true. A week later, the girl friend was transferred to another unit, and they never saw each other again." Ultra Magnus stared forward blankly, as if trying to recall a painful event.

"That Autobot was an idiot. Did he ever get a second chance?"

"Yes, he got a second chance, but he failed once again. His girlfriend came back to see him, but he spoke to her as nothing but a platonic friend. The Autobot was still too obsessed with his duty to renew his feelings of love. The words were at the tip of his vocalizer, but he never said them, even as he listened to the suggestions and subtle flirtations of his girlfriend. Once again, he had sacrificed the only chance he had of happiness for his duty to his cause and his allies. I think he's still wondering if he made the right choice."

"You were that idiot, weren't you?" Nightscream snickered, but he stopped when Ultra Magnus gave him a stare. "Okay, so it could have been Ironhide, or Hot Rod, or even Prowl. That doesn't make whoever it was any less of an idiot."

"I've told you a story. Now, go to sleep."

"Did that Autobot ever get with any other femmes? He couldn't have been single for that long."

"There were two others." Ultra Magnus growled in frustration. "Both got together with him on accident, and he couldn't keep a relationship with either of them. They both went away and he never saw either of them again."

"Was he seeing both at the same time?"

"No. He dated one, broke up with her, and then met the other." Ultra Magnus explained indignantly. "Now, he looks back on the happy time he spent with the three girls, and the memories of their smiles cut into his spark. It's a reminder of the happiness he would never have."

"You're that idiot, right?"

"Go to bed, **now**!"

Oceancruiser stirred from her sleep. The first thing she noticed was Cobalt holding her. She pulled away with a yelp. "How long was I asleep? Is Nightscream okay?"

"You were sleeping for a half hour, during which I held you." At this, both of the cadets blushed bright red.

"I'll go see Nightscream." Oceancruiser ran off, looking too embarrassed for words.

Nightscream woke up from his sleep coughing. A large glob of sticky oil was in his throat, and his systems were unable to ventilate correctly. Thus, the seeker was bent over coughing like he was going to hack up a lung. The noise, of course, attracted his sister who rushed in and slapped him on the back with a fierce karate chop. Not only did Nightscream expel the oil glob, but he also vomited up his breakfast and passed out from the sheer force of the impact.

"Holy Primus! Are you okay?" When Nightscream did not stir, Oceancruiser ran to the restroom and tore a toilet from the ground. She proceeded to empty its contents on Nightscream's head. The seeker woke up, spitting and sputtering.

"What did your pour on me?" Nightscream examined his body in disgust.

"Don't worry, I'll get you some lunch and then I'll clean you up!" When Nightscream weakly nodded, Oceancruiser ran down to the mess hall.

"How's Rust-face?" Fastlane was shoving food down his throat as fast as he could.

"Not very well. I hope Cobalt was right about the fever only lasting twenty-four hours." Oceancruiser picked at her food. She was so worried that she had completely lost her usually humongous appetite.

"I know you're upset, but starving yourself doesn't do any good." Windshear sat down next to her best friend. "Cobalt is the medic, and you're not. I think you could trust him."

"Oceancruiser, I'm not that inexperienced." Cobalt pouted. Oceancruiser playfully pushed him, knocking him out of his chair.

Blackout opened the restroom door and was knocked down by a torrent of water. She had gone to the restroom to relieve herself, but she unwittingly chose the lavatory from which Oceancruiser had torn the toilet which she used to wake up Nightscream. Luckily, the toilet had been flushed, so the only bad consequence was Blackout being soaked to the bone. The poor femme sat there for a minute and then called for help.

"You're screaming bloody murder and there's nothing wrong." Oceancruiser observed disgustedly when she arrived.

"How is there nothing wrong? Someone is trying to flood our campsite!"

"It's just some water. Besides, I caused it by tearing off a toilet."

"I should have known it was you, traitor."

"Why is it that every time we talk you managed to change the subject to this?"

"Who's trying to change the subject now?"

"Guys…" Cobalt attempted to get a word in, but the glares from the two girls drove him away.

"Both of you shut up." Windshear stood between the two. "Cobalt, go in there and fix that toilet."

"I'll help!" Oceancruiser offered cheerfully.

"If you're going in there, I'm going in too!" Windshear threw herself between Oceancruiser and the door.

"You can't swim, remember?" Oceancruiser snickered as she remembered the last time her friend had participated in the aquatic activities.

"Don't worry, I'll watch her." Blackout turned to Oceancruiser. "Don't even think of pulling any tricks, traitor. I'm not turning my back for one second."

"Fine, I won't pull any tricks." With that, both of the girls followed Cobalt into the restroom.

Ultra Magnus watched Nightscream slowly sip his energon. Nightscream had vomited twice in one hour, so he had to be careful when eating. Ultra Magnus didn't like to sit by the cadet and play baby-sitter: he was a soldier, not a nanny.

"I'm full." Nightscream pushed away his half-emptied cube of energon. Ultra Magnus didn't even bother to point out that Nightscream hadn't finished it.

"If you're done, then go to sleep."

"No, thanks." Nightscream muttered.

"You're sick. Go to sleep."

Nightscream made a face at Ultra Magnus. "I don't want to sleep."

"You will sleep or you will scrub toilets."

"I'm sick. I'll vomit if I scrub anything."

"What do I have to do to get you to go to sleep?"

"Dress in drag and do the hula."

"Shut up before I knock you out."

"I despise you."

"I'm your superior officer, not your friend."

Before Nightscream could think up a suitable retort, he felt yet another glob of sticky oil at his throat. When he bent over coughing, Ultra Magnus gently thumped him on the back. Nightscream finished coughing after thirty seconds and sat there panting.

"Don't move around so much. You'll do even more damage to yourself." Ultra Magnus gingerly helped Nightscream lie back down.

"You may look tough, but you're just a big softy."

"Shut up."

"You have the shell of a giant robot and the spark of a mother hen."

"I thought I told you to be quiet!"

"Fastlane was right when he codenamed you 'Big-momma.'"

By this time, Ultra Magnus was on the verge of blushing as red as a tomato, so he retreated out the door with the shards of his dignity that were still intact. Nightscream snickered and mentally patted himself on the back.

"We need to stuff this big hole." Cobalt observed. The three cadets were crowded around the mess of leaking pipes left in the absence of a toilet. Blackout and Oceancruiser were shoving each other to the side in an attempt to get a closer look.

"Let's use Blackout's head!" Oceancruiser grabbed Blackout and shoved her forward.

"We should use yours, traitor." Blackout pushed Oceancruiser frontward. Oceancruiser responded with a punch to the jaw that sent Blackout reeling. Then Oceancruiser pounced on the other cadet and the two became involved in yet another fistfight.

"You need to stop fighting!" Cobalt called. "I need some peace and quiet to ponder this conundrum."

"All I need is tape, data pads, and vacuums." Oceancruiser volunteered. Blackout and Cobalt stared at her. "I might not be a plumber, but I can hold pipes together while Cobalt does what he needs to."

When Blackout came back with the supplies, Oceancruiser grabbed them and proceeded to fix the problem brusquely. First, she crumpled the data pads and stuffed them into the holes. Then, she used the vacuums as support splints to keep the pipes from breaking. Finally, she covered everything in a fine layer of tape.

"How did you learn to do that?" Blackout stared forward in astonishment.

"I saw this once on this show called 'Home Improvement.' I've always wanted to try this. Well, I've always wanted to release gas into a microphone too…"

"I've got it!" Cobalt announced, saving Blackout from Oceancruiser's list of things that she wanted to do. He proceeded to dive down and gently hammer one of the pipes. However, it was the wrong one and waste oil spurted into the air, reaching the height of one mile before plopping down.

It was seven o'clock at night when the three cadets got back. The looks on their faces told the others not to ask. The three grabbed their enrgon, drank it quickly, and headed to the wash rack. They were in the mess hall for a short amount of time, but they still left a rancid smell behind.

"What happened to them?" Fastlane asked, oblivious as ever.

Nightscream stumbled out of his room. According to Ultra Magnus, his fever had already broken. Therefore, the young seeker was going to try and eat a meal into the mess hall. A silence fell over all present; a silence finally broken by Double-header.

"Nightscream, are you okay now?"

"Better than ever." At Nightscream's answer, all the other cadets smiled in relief. Nightscream smiled back and sat down "So, tell me about your day."

As the tables broke into conversion, Ultra Magnus grinned to himself. Even if he was reluctant to admit it, part of him loved those kids. At this moment, seeing them happy and healthy was more satisfying than that time he tore off Galvatron's arm and knocked a Sweep out with it.

"Repairs are complete, Lord Magmatron." Laserwing stated.

Magmatron walked around and punched the air for a bit. Then, satisfied that his body was back in working condition, he sat back into his throne.

"Lord Magmatron, what do you propose we do about Starscream?" Wildclench's query earned him an angry glare from Magmatron.

"As soon as our new member adjusts herself, we will show Starscream—no, Nightscream—how wrong he was to betray me. Isn't that right?"

"Yes, Mighty Magmatron." A soft female voice whispered from the shadows, despite the fact that no form could be seen. Magmatron burst into an evil laugh, which was chorused by the rest of the Decepticons present and the unknown voice.


	10. Assassin

Windshear's day began when Oceancruiser leapt into her bed and onto her stomach. On a more accurate note, her day had actually begun around midnight, when Double-header started kicking her bunk with a vengeance; but Windshear ignored it and fell back asleep. Therefore, Windshear's first waking moment, after which she could no longer sleep, came when Oceancruiser pounced on the seeker and knocked the breath out of her.

"Oceancruiser, what are you doing?" Windshear gasped. Having a fully armored destroyer on her chassis made it difficult to breathe, much less talk.

Oceancruiser sheepishly slid off Windshear's body. "Guess what? Ultra Magnus is going to let us watch videos today! He says that he needs a day off, so we can do whatever we want as long as we're quiet! Isn't that great?" Oceancruiser was beaming with joy.

"Stupendous." Windshear jumped out of her bed. "You better not be plotting something stupid again."

"What if I am?"

"I'll shove my guns up your nose."

"You have to catch me first!" Oceancruiser called, running out of the cabin. Shaking her head, Windshear followed her best friend.

When Windshear walked into the mess hall, the first thing she saw was a disgruntled Fastlane. He was swirling his drink and focusing on the colors, instead of trying to drink it all in one gulp and then say something nonsensical. When Pallas attempted to ask him what was wrong, Fastlane just pushed her away with a grunt.

"Well, someone's in a bad mood." Oceancruiser commented.

"I got a really rude awakening." Fastlane grumbled.

"What could be ruder than Oceancruiser bouncing on your stomach?" Windshear posed a rhetorical question.

"Crosscut bouncing on your stomach while on soda-high." Fastlane pointed at the hyperactive cadet, who was trying to hold an energon cube in his foot, but failing miserably.

"In this case, you can only fight fire with fire!" Oceancruiser pulled out an energon soda. "Drink until you see fluffy green rabbits doing the hula on Nightbeat's head! Only then will you be able to counter Crosscut's hyperactiveness with your own!"

"Bottoms up!" Fastlane yelled back, chugging his energon enthusiastically.

Windshear sighed and slapped her forehead. It was too early for her friends to start doing this now. With Oceancruiser and Fastlane, who were possibly the most hyperactive Autobots in Cybertron's history, going on a soda binge, this was going to be a long day.

Windshear performed her final stretch before the morning laps began. Just as she readied herself to run, Ultra Magnus called both her and Fastlane over.

"Both of you listen carefully. This is a very special mission that only the two of you can accomplish." Ultra Magnus' face was a mask of seriousness.

"What is it? What is it? I'm so psyched! I finally get to do something special." Fastlane was on the verge of hyperventilating. Windshear slapped him upside the head to calm him down.

As if to answer Fastlane's question, an Autobot shuttle landed in front of the cadets. The femme who stepped out was mainly light pink, but she had dark pink detailing. She was around average height, with an alternate mode that resembled a hovercraft. Her optics were aquamarine and her helmet was arched into a curved horn shape on the back of her head with heart shaped bangs in front. Her armor was extremely ornate, having spikes on the shoulders and spirals on the waist. She had two short sword buckled to her waist and five different types of guns tied to her legs. A massive double-edged sword was tied to her back.

"Hey, who's the babe? She might be old, but she ages gracefully." Crosscut commented.

"I am Detective Razorshift of the Cybertron Investigation Committee. I am here to request your assistance." Razorshift declared in a thick Scandinavian accent.

"Why did you select us? We're only cadets." Windshear protested.

"You are the ones most familiar with the terrain. The criminal I am pursuing is an Insecticon assassin named Waveslash, who has a reputation for blending into the background." Razorshift explained. "Now, let us begin our search. There is no time to lose."

"If she's an assassin, then she must be dangerous. We're cadets; we can't handle her!" Windshear objected.

"Yes we can! We've fought harder villains before!" Fastlane argued. Windshear just slapped him upside the head.

"Your mission is simply to guide me through the forest and provide minor backup. If the criminal starts to overwhelm me, then you two, being the fastest cadets, are to run back to the camp and gather reinforcements. I will do the real fighting." Razorshift trained her glare on them. "Am I understood?"

"Yes, ma'am."

A male and female deer were walking next to each other in the forest. The two stopped at a lake to take a drink. Just as they lowered their head, however, loud rustling came form the bushes behind them. Alerted to the noise, the deer attempted to run away. Unfortunately, the enemy was too fast.

A single slice was all it took. The male deer collapsed into a pool of blood, dead before it hit the ground. As the predator lowered its head to devour the victim, the female, who had been the male's mate, ran like the great un-maker was on her heels.

"Yes…run…so pathetic. The male was worse, but what could you expect from the weaker sex? They are not capable of doing anything without their mates. In this world, filled with the survival of the strong, they do not deserve to live…." A metallic, female voice hissed. Blood red optics narrowed as it heard something approach.

"Are you sure your heard something? A wild goose chase will only waste more of our precious time." Windshear groused as the three Autobots dashed through the undergrowth.

"I didn't hear it; I smelled it." Fastlane grinned back at the girls. "I'm sure it's here."

"This is a serious mission, so you should be telling the truth." Razorshift stated. "Waveslash is a dangerous murderer. There is no knowing what amount of chaos that she could cause if not brought into custody."

"Look, footprints!" Windshear noticed the imprints on the ground. "She seems to have also enjoyed a meal here."

"How do you figure that?" Fastlane asked.

Windshear pointed to a spot next to the lake, where the body of a deer lay. Every last strip of meat had been stripped from the bones, leaving the structure to soak in a puddle of blood. Fastlane screamed and hid behind Windshear when he saw it.

"More likely than not it was a male." Razorshift quietly deduced. "Waveslash has a perverted view of the world, in which she believes that only the strong will survive. She also believes that the stronger sex is the female one."

"How do you know that?" Fastlane's optics widened.

"When you track a criminal for millions of years, you will be surprised at how much you learn about them. It is almost as if you have become that criminal and now see the world as they do." Razorshift observed the ground carefully for a while and then pointed to a direction. "She went over there."

"What are we waiting for? Let's get that assassin!" Fastlane rushed off without waiting for his comrades.

Waveslash paused as she heard a rustle in the trees behind her. Whipping around, she threw a kunai at the source of the noise. When no one answered, she sighed and continued on her way.

"Death from above!" Before Waveslash could respond, Fastlane had pounced on her head.

"Get off me, you weakling." Waveslash threw him over her should with a simple flip. "I'll make sure you won't be around to waste energon any more. Only the strong survive, while the weak become…" Waveslash paused to smack her lips, "my dinner!"

Fastlane focused on the femme who had flung him away so easily. She might have been a crazed, sexist survivalist, but she was attractive to say the least. Waveslash's body was dark green, trimmed with silver. Her helmet was shaped like the head of the praying mantis, with red colored artificial hair poking out from the bottom. Two serrated blades, which became her arms in robot mode, hung from her waist. She was also carrying a large sniper rifle, which she aimed at Fastlane's head. Since she had just devoured an animal, blood was trickling from her mouth, dyeing her lips a spooky red that only stood out more compared with the pale whiteness of her face.

"You look like on of those vampires in the movies." Fastlane declared stupidly.

"The weak are food for the strong. Not only do I drink their blood, but I also eat their flesh." Waveslash hissed.

"Sorry, but I don't taste good." While Waveslash had let down her guard to explain why she looked like this, Fastlane tackled her. Waveslash clenched his body between her legs and slammed his head into the ground. Fastlane grabbed Waveslash's shoulders to steady himself after painfully making contact with the ground and then started to hit her in the face. Waveslash kicked Fastlane in the stomach and knocked him off of her.

"No more games, boy. I'll kill you now." Waveslash held her gun up to Fastlane's face.

"Push that trigger and you will dead too. Put down the gun and step away slowly." Razorshift was aiming her gun at Waveslash.

"I see that you haven't been following me around for nothing." Waveslash turned around. "I think our little conflict can be settled honorably, don't you? We're both strong, and it's time to see who's stronger." Waveslash put up her gun and held out her swords.

"If it's a fight you want, you'll get it. I swore to bring you to justice, and I will do that." Razorshift unbuckled her massive sword. "Windshear, you and Fastlane go contact Ultra Magnus. Tell him to step in if I lose."

"You heard her, Fastlane. Let's go find Ultra Magnus." Before Fastlane could respond, he was dragged away by Windshear.

"The youngsters are out of the way. Now there is nothing preventing me from slagging you." Waveslash lunged forward, swinging one of her blades.

"Would the presence of children have prevented you from doing otherwise?" Razorshift dodged the attack and slammed the flat end of her blade into Waveslash's head.

"No, they would have been a minor annoyance." Waveslash blocked a blow from Razorshift with one blade and slashed twice into the police officer's chest. "You, on the other hand, would have been too preoccupied with protecting them than giving me a good fight."

Razorshift leapt back a few steps and steadied her self, wielding her sword like a baseball bat. She slapped the flat into Waveslash's stomach and then clubbed her over the head with the hilt. Waveslash swept a low kick into Razorshift's legs. When the police officer jumped over her head and stabbed the sword straight down, Waveslash rolled away. Razorshift yanked her sword out and started swinging it in wide arcs. Waveslash growled in frustration when she realized she had been forced on the defensive. However, Razorshift's strength began giving out and she slowed down a little bit, giving Waveslash an opening to tackle her opponent. Razorshift threw Waveslash off of her with a swift uppercut. Waveslash returned the favor by kneeing Razorshift in the neck.

"Now this is what I'm talking about—a good fight where you can give it your all." Waveslash ducked under another slice of Razorshift's sword and countered with two swift strikes from her own weapons. "You're enjoying this as mush as I am, but you're too in denial to admit it."

"The only thing I'm here to do is to arrest you!" Razorshift angrily swung a fist toward Waveslash's chest. The assassin rolled with the blow and wagged a finger mockingly.

"Now, now, we mustn't lose our temper." She jumped on Razorshift, swinging her blades in deadly sweeps. "I'm going to cut you up and season you and eat you. You are strong, but not strong enough to defeat me. I haven't eaten another Cybertronian for a long time, so I'll enjoy eating you. I'm sure you'll taste much better than you look." Wavelash was practically drooling as she continued to exchange blows with Razorshift.

"We have to go back." Fastlane stopped and refused to go any further.

"Razorshift clearly told us to go get help. It's the best, and safest, thing we can do" Windshear gave Fastlane's arm a tug. "Hurry up and get back to camp. We're wasting time."

"You go on ahead. I don't think it was right to leave Razorshift behind. I'll go back and help." Before Windshear could stop him, Fastlane transformed and sped off. Windshear slapped her forehead in frustration before deciding to keep on going back, since it was the only thing she could do to help either Fastlane or Razorshift.

Waveslash backed away slowly when she saw Razorshift hold a gun to her face. The police officer had stunned the Insecticon long enough to grad a gun, thus putting Wave slash at a severe disadvantage. Out of the corner of her optic, Waveslash caught sight of one of her blades. If Razorshift did not notice, then the tide of battle could still turn.

"Here I come to save the day!" Fastlane jumped out of nowhere and tackled Waveslash. The surprised Insecticon snapped a punch into his stomach, more out of instinct than anything else.

"What are you doing here? I had it under control." Razorshift snapped.

"I came to save you."

"Did I need saving?"

"You sure looked like a damsel in distress when we left."

"Get back to camp! You're in danger here."

While Razorshift and Fastlane were arguing, Waveslash retrieved her blade. Silently, she flung it forward, impaling Razorshift on the shoulder. With a small gas, Razorshift collapsed onto Fastlane.

"What happened? Why is there so much mech fluid?" Fastlane watched in horror as Razorshift's shoulder continued to bleed. "Are you okay? Wake up!"

"This is your fault…" Razorshift stood up, holding her shoulder. Before she could react, Waveslash jumped behind her and grabbed Fastlane.

"You might be good enough to eat, but this boy will make a delicious appetizer." Waveslash slowly stroked Fastlane's cheek.

"Let him go!" Razorshift winced as the throbbing in her shoulder turned into a stab.

"Who's got the hostage? You should threaten people when you have the advantage." Waveslash pushed her blade against Fastlane's neck.

"What do you want?" Razoeshift growled. It had been so long since she found herself in a scenario like this, forced to negotiate with the enemy.

"If you stand there and take your beating like a real Cybertronian, I'll release him. Otherwise…" Waveslash drew a line on her neck with her finger. "Well, you get the idea."

Razorshift took in a deep breath. Waveslash's demands had her stuck in between a rock and a hard place. To add to the dilemma, assassins, especially Insecticon assassins, were not known for their integrity. "If I surrender, will you promise to let him go?"

"I swear upon the ruins of Kalis that I will release him." Waveslash was grabbing Fastlane so hard that he could not help emitting a small cry of pain. However, when he saw Razorshift slowly lower her weapons, he forgot all about his current crisis.

"Don't do it! Shoot through me, shoot around me; just don't surrender! Didn't we come here to arrest Waveslash? I got captured trying to help you, so take her down already!" Before Fastlane could say any more, Waveslash spun him around and slapped him in the face.

"Hold your tongue. I can kill you any time I please." Waveslash glared at her hostage.

"Fastlane, I am a law enforcement officer. My first priorities are upholding the law…" Razorshift set down all of her weapons. "…And saving the lives that the laws protect. Compared to the arrest, you are the main concern."

"Don't you hate it when some kid gets captured, and the cop just has to play the self-sacrificing hero? Unfortunately, heroes get killed." Waveslash aimed her rifle at Razorshift. "I think you'll be delectable."

Out of nowhere, Waveslash's gun was knocked out of her hand by a shot. Windshear stood behind the assassin, smirking. "Do you think I'd really leave anyone alone with Fastlane?"

"You came back! I can't believe it! I thought that you were going to get Ultra Magnus." Fastlane was slapped again for his defiance.

"I contended myself with leaving him a message instead. I know how you tend to make everything a bigger mess than it was before."

"How touching." Waveslash threw Fastlane into Windshear. "Unfortunately, this is not going to save you."

Before Waveslash could fire, Razorshift tackled her into the ground. Windshear used this opportunity to grab her gun and shoot Waveslash in the back. The now livid Insecticon jumped on Windshear and tried to strangle her, but the seeker threw Waveslash off with a kick. Fastlane jumped on both of them, turning the fight into a melee. Windshear and Waveslash both turned around and punched Fastlane in the jaw knocking him out. Windshear then whipped out her sword and cut into Waveslash's chest. The assassin fell back with an astonished cry.

"You're a strong fighter. Care to join me?" Waveslash beckoned.

"All I'm here to do is help Razorshift arrest you." Windshear crossed her sword with Waveslash's twin sabers. After a while, Waveslash began to slowly push Windshear back.

"You don't seem to be strong enough to defeat me. A pity, you had so much potential." Just a Waveslash seemed to overtake Windshear, Fastlane charged into her.

"Secret Autobot Ninja Maneuver: Shrimp Bridge Slam!" Fastlane grabbed Waveslash's waist and bent over backwards. Waveslash was hoisted over Fastlane and slammed head-first into the ground. Before Waveslash could react, Windshear chopped one of her arms. The two cadets then sat on the assassin, restricting her movement.

"Do you think you can really defeat me? You're nothing but children." With one swipe, Waveslash threw off both cadets. "Any last words?"

"Here comes the cavalry." Fastlane pointed to the distance, where Ultra Magnus and the other cadets had started to arrive.

"It seems our meeting would have to be cut short, then." Waveslash leapt off into the expanse of forest before anyone could stop her.

"Windshear, are you okay?" Oceancruiser helped her best friend to her feet.

"I'm fine, but the criminal got away." Windshear dusted herself off. Behind her, Nightscream helped Fastlane while Ultra Magnus carried Razorshift.

"If I ever see that bug-lady ever again, then I'll tear out her fuel pump with wooden salad tongs and string a banjo with her wires!" Oceancruiser clenched her fists angrily. "No one hurts my friends and gets a way with it."

"Sorry to burst your bubble." Everyone stared at Fastlane, thoroughly confused. "It's an Earth saying that means to put a damper on your fun. Anyway, we need to get Razorshift back to base. She's hurt."

"This is all thanks to you, numbnut." Razorshift snapped. However, when she saw Fastlane's remorseful expression, she decided not to rub it in any longer. "I forgive you. Just use your brain next time."

Fastlane happily nodded and transformed, traveling back to camp with everyone else. Out of their sensory range, an Insecticon assassin limped back to her employers.

"You have not lived up to your reputation, Waveslash." Magmatron glared at the Insecticon kneeling before him. "You are supposed to be the greatest assassin on Cybertron, but you could not even capture a cadet."

"Forgive me, Lord Magmatron, I will succeed next time." Waveslash grabbed her stump of an arm the sooner that this was done, the sooner she could get her needed repairs. The only reason that she had not jumped up and put a blade next to Magmatron's neck was because he was amazingly strong for a male. Waveslash liked the company of strong people, especially when they could match her in combat, since the only ones she respected were those whom she met in combat.

"You sound like the rest of my men when you say that." Magmatron commented.

"I only failed because of the unexpected presence of Razorshift."

"Expect her presence next time."

"I will, sir; and I will destroy her."

"I don't care about anybody else. Just complete the mission I paid you to carry out."

"I understand, sir."

"Good, now go get repaired." After she heard Magmatron's orders, Razorshift stumbled to her feet and staggered toward the med bay.

"Will you require an escort?" A mysterious femme appeared out of the darkness and supported Waveslash.

"No it's not necessary." Even as Waveslash protested, the unknown femme helped the Insecticon walk.

"Euphony, don't forget your own assignment." Magmatron called. "You're next."

"It is an honor to carry out your orders, Lord Magmatron. I will not disappoint you." Euphony turned and bowed.

"We won't disappoint you either, boss." Shadowy shapes appeared next to Euphony, all assuring Magmatron of their future success.

"It's great to see that you're so motivated." Magmatron gave them an evil glare. "But be warned; don't fail me if you want to come back to this place."

"I understand, Lord Magmatron." Euphony and her shadows faded back into the darkness as night fell on the forest.


	11. Euphony

_Just as a reminder, I do not own the concept transformers: Hasbro, Takara, Marvel, and whoever is making the new Transformers movie do. The cadets and the reject Decepticons are my origingal charcters, but anyone can use them. Stormcloud belongs to Storm Blue Lightning-Saix, who let me use her character._

Euphony woke up when the sun's beams shone on her face. She looked toward Waveslash, who was lying in the recharger bed beside her. After a while, the assassin awoke, rubbing at her tired optics.

"What happened? Last thing I remember was fighting Razorshift." Waveslash looked around confusedly.

"You don't remember? You came back with one arm severed and severe energon loss. It took hours to get you stabilized." Euphony calmly smiled.

"Next time I see that goody-two-shoes, I'll going to tear off her face and clean my toilet with it!" Waveslash punched her left palm with her newly-reattached right fist.

"Forgive me, but the medics have ordered that you do not excite yourself for twenty-four hours." Euphony gently pushed Waveslash back down.

"But who'll complete the mission?"

"Once again, forgive me, as this has now become my assignment." Euphony turned and walked away. "Please don't worry about anything. You'll be surprised at how much backup I have."

Ultra Magnus was in the middle of sipping an energon cube when his comlink rang. Everyone turned to stare at the surprised city commander. As inconspicuously as he could, Ultra Magnus turned around to answer.

"Guess what? I've got permission to spend the rest of summer vacation with you!" Stormcloud's happy voice chirped.

"Really? That would be great…" Ultra Magnus threw a glance at Razorshift and the cadets. "…but I'm occupied right now."

"I'll help you with whatever you have to do. I'll be the assistant instructor!"

"Thanks, but no thanks. I've got my hands full with things that only…"

"He'll be glad to let you come!" Oceancruiser shouted into the comlink, which was right next to Ultra Magnus' audio. "I think that it's going to be really fun for Mayday to come hang out again. Right, Magnus?"

Ultra Magnus threw an angry glare at Oceancruiser. "They can come over—as soon as my audios stop ringing." Oceancruiser just grinned sheepishly in response.

"Hold on. I do not agree to this." Razorshift looked up from her energon cube. "The more people present, the more likely it is that my identity shall be revealed."

"Why do you care so much about you identity anyway?" Oceancruiser leaned back in her chair. "We all know that you're some sort of cop."

"I am an undercover agent. No one except my superior officers are supposed to know of my presence here."

"Don't worry; Stormcloud's a nice person. She won't blow your cover." Oceancruiser pointed at Blackout. "However, you should be careful around her. She's got an obsession with blowing covers."

"Shut up, traitor." Blackout slammed her fists into the table.

"Well, it looks like I hit a soft spot." Oceancruiser made a face. "What are you going to do: hit me?"

Blackout jumped up and slammed her fist into Oceancruiser's face. Oceancruiser blocked the punch and proceeded to twist Blackout's arm behind her painfully. Blackout elbowed Oceancruiser in the stomach with her good arm, forcing the other girl to let go. She then struck the destroyer in the head, causing Oceancruiser to stagger back, with stars in her eyes.

"Both of you stop." Windshear stepped between the combatants and held the apart. "This worthless fighting will not solve anything. The best course of action is to let Razorshift assume a fake identity."

"I hope I ain't interrupting anything." While the cadets were discussing the aliases that Razorshift could go by, Stormcloud had gotten impatient. "Maxima gave me some time off, so I figured I'd come and visit you guys."

"Where's May? I wanted to tell her everything that happened after she left." Oceancruiser whined. "There was this music video, and a bunch Decepticon Rejects! Oh, I also got to hit someone with a toilet!"

"Please forgive me, but Mayday is currently occupied. Her two best friends came down from Cybertron, and she's got her hands full orienting them to our base." Stormcloud apologized, not at all fazed by Oceancruiser's comments.

"Hey, if you're lucky, you could get to kick some Decepticon-can!"

"That would be awesome."

A loud, metallic sneeze reverberated through the forest. Beasts of the land and air dashed away, and those were not fast enough feigned death. Fortunately, the three large robots currently treading through the foliage were not interested in stepping on woodland inhabitants.

"Are you alright? This is my assignment, and I do not require your aid. You could always go back." Euphony turned and stared at the young Decepticon walking behind her and Waveslash. Despite the protests that Euphony had made, the assassin still insisted upon coming.

"No, thanks. I've still got a score to settle with Oceancruiser. I'll show her who the best is." The Decepticon began to walk faster and faster, mumbling angrily as she advanced

Ultra Magnus, the cadets, and Razorshift were watching Stormcloud's small shuttle land. The orange vessel was clearly more dented than the cadets remembered, since it looked like a stunt double in a monster truck show. It was flying somewhat lopsidedly, but it was because of the amount of damage to the ship and not the inexperience of the pilot.

"Howdy, y'all, I'm glad to see you again." Stormcloud greeted everyone with her faint western drawl. "Magnus, I am so proud of you."

"What do you mean?" Ultra Magnus looked confused.

"Don't be modest. I'm so happy that you finally found a girlfriend. What's her name?"

Ultra Magnus sputtered for a bit and pointed at Razorshift. "You mean her? She's…"

"…not his girlfriend, by any stretch of the imagination. I am only his assistant instructor." Razorshift intervened, desperately protecting her identity.

"You can stop being shy." Stormcloud inched up and examined Razorshift. "You seem to be a great person. I want all the spicy details."

"What are spicy details?" Nightscream asked, causing all the adults and a select few of the cadets to blush.

"Spicy details are…um…I just can't describe them." Stormcloud stammered.

"With both of you here, we can train these cadets in some more complex matters." Ultra Magnus quickly changed the subject. "All of you march to the target range in an orderly fashion.

"They've gone back in." Waveslash's optics narrowed. "Now is the perfect time for a smash-and-grab job."

"We'll need a decoy." Euphony hissed.

"Say no more." The third Decepticon transformed into her alternate mode and fired a missile into the front of the camp.

Instantly, the alarms rang out. This time, Blackout had switched the alarm tone to "The Twelve Days of Christmas," so everyone's audios were assaulted with the Christmas carol. Except for Blackout, Oceancruiser, and Razorshift, whose sonar protected them, everybody felt ready to slice the alarm into pieces for playing such lousy music.

"You change alarms as often as you change ring tones." Oceancruiser muttered.

"The alarms are my ring tones." Blackout admitted reluctantly. "Is this any time to be talking about alarms? We're under attack!"

"This time, I agree with little miss paranoia." Oceancruiser pulled out her gun. "Let's go take down Decepticons!"

"Wait." Razorshift looked around cautiously. "This could be a trap to lure us out into the open."

"I agree. This could be a possible ambush." Windshear concurred.

"Fine, if you won't go, then I will. This will only take a second." Before anyone could stop her, Oceancruiser had already bolted out the door.

"What a pity; that girl should have listened to her elders." Waveslash jumped in through the window. "Too bad, I think she was strong."

"Don't forget me. After all, this is my assignment." Euphony carefully stepped through the hall that Waveslash made. Euphony was an indigo and black Decepticon, with a red colored optic visor. She had a large shoulder cannon and a smaller taser gun. Her alternate mode was an audio system that could play both CDs and cassettes. The sides of her helmet, like Salvager's, sloped back to resemble horns, but her horns were much shorter.

"How many times do you need to say that? I already know that it's your mission and I'm only helping." Waveslash grumbled.

"Excuse me, but there's fifteen of us and only two of you. You're at a distinct disadvantage, pal." Stormcloud whipped out her halberd. "This'll be quicker than I expected."

"We are at an even number." Euphony gently stroked her chest area. "Diskcons, please eject." Instantly, twelve CDs ejected and transformed into their respective forms: a squirrel, a bull, a jaguar, a fanged jackalope, an eoraptor, a snail, a python, a horse, a mountain goat, a sparrow, a wolf, and a robot.

"What's our mission this time?" The squirrel squeaked.

"I'm sorry for inconveniencing you and your siblings, Secret, but you need to go into battle. Please help me occupy them." Euphony smiled and stroked Secret's head.

"What are you apologizing for, Mom? We love fighting." The robot clenched his fists. "Just wait till I give them a pounding—they'll learn to fear the wrath of Creeper!"

As soon as Fastlane heard those words, he fell on his back, rolling with laughter. "You couldn't even dent my armor. How do you plan on beating me, kid?"

"Like this." The snail rolled himself into a spiked ball and barreled over Fastlane's foot, puncturing a few holes. "How's that for not even denting?"

"Good job, Tirebiter, he'll be feeling that in the morning." Creeper grinned. "As for me, I'll take the morgue dude."

"That's Mr. Morgue Dude to you, twerp." Crosscut whipped out his acid blaster. "Say good night."

"I'll get you yet, you little excuse for a bug!" Fastlane barreled into Crosscut and Blackout, sending the three into a heap on the floor.

"Watch where you're going!" Before Blackout could finish admonishing Fastlane, the mountain goat came from behind and rammed into her back. Blackout was sent up into the air and slammed face-first on the roof. At the same time, Iceberg was battling the python. Just as the serpent was ready to inject Iceberg with cyber-venom, Blackout landed on it aft-first, unceremoniously crushing the poor cassette.

"Thank you for your unnecessary assistance." Iceberg bent down to speak with Blackout. "Please do not interfere in my future battles.

"I didn't mean to help you, traitor." Blackout mustered, pouting.

"You…have…a big bum." The snake wheezed. Blackout instantly seized it by the tail and flung it into the goat, which stumbled back a bit and slipped on Tirebiter.

"Good raptor, nice raptor, you don't want to eat me." Cobalt was slowly backing away from the snarling eoraptor. "I'm a weak, scrawny medical aide who hasn't taken a bath in the past week."

"That is so gross!" Every female in the room chorused.

"Anyway, you don't know where I've been, so don't eat me." What happened next was too fast for anyone to understand. The raptor charged at Cobalt, who pulled out one of his experimental cannons and fired. The raptor dodged, but miscalculated her angle, resulting in her head being stuck in the barrel when the firearm detonated. Both the wielder and the target were thrown into opposite ends of the room and knocked out. The raptor slammed into Crosscut, who with the transferred momentum, was hurled up into the sparrow, who was currently engaged in a dogfight with Windshear.

"What are you doing?" Windshear asked exasperatedly.

"Help me!" Pallas yelped, sending everyone's optics looking in her direction. Secret and all of his clones were chasing her, acid trickling from their mouths.

"Nuts yummy, Robots yummier." The squirrels chanted.

"Death to the vermin!" Fastlane called, tackling Pallas. The two rolled across the room knocking down Torpedo, who was fighting the fanged jackalope. All five of the combatants were tangled up in a mesh of arms and legs.

"You might be strong, but I'm stronger." Double-header was grappling with the bull. For a second, it looked like the bull would win, but Double-header pulled a quick comeback, throwing the bull into Flower Wagon.

"Please don't do that." Flower Wagon begged. He was trying to initiate a civilized conversation with the wolf, and he didn't need any distractions. "Just because Euphony is your creator doesn't mean you need to follow her every order. War is bad, and you shouldn't fight unless in self-defense."

"Insolent cur; how dare you insult mine master? Have at thee!" The wolf sprang at Flower Wagon, but was downed by a shot from the hippie's stun gun.

"I'm sorry. I wish I could have solved the problem without violence."

Nightscream stared at his opponent. Despite being small, the jaguar was swift. So far, it had dodged every attack and sat there, contently licking its paws. Nightscream raised his sword: victory or defeat depended on this next move.

The jaguar's eyes glinted as Nightscream sprang into action. This time, instead of leaping away, it jumped toward the seeker. Its claw extended just as Nightscream's sword came down. There was the screech of tearing metal, and then one of the two combatants fell.

Oceancruiser pouted when she heard the sounds of a melee come from within the cabin. She had dashed out to fight the decoy, but now she found nothing there. She debated in her head the option of going back, but then decided to stay. After all, those Decepticons probably left a lookout.

"Hello again, Oceancruiser; I hope you remember me." The voice that suddenly appeared behind Oceancruiser made her jump a couple feet into the air with a loud scream. When she calmed down, she turned and stared into the Decepticon's optics.

"I remember you! You're…" Oceancruiser scratched her head. "I forgot your name."

"I'm Tangletwist! Try to remember my name with that ridiculously small central processor of yours!" Tangletwist screamed at her former comrade. She, like Oceancruiser, was a cadet, but she was allied with the Decepticons. She was teal blue with dark red detailing. Her optics, now narrowed in anger, were the generic red, but set in a bronze-colored faceplate. There were several missile launchers of varying sizes strapped to her back. She also had two long cannons on her shoulders.

"I remember now! You're the butt-kissing strategist! You bribed the teachers to get into the army."

"Be quiet!"

"Make me."

"I'll pour hot sauce in your vocalizer!" The frustrated Decepticon cadet jumped on Oceancruiser.

"In the name of the Cybertron Investigation Bureau, you are under arrest!" Razorshift shouted at Waveslash. Stormcloud was chasing Euphony around with her halberd while Razorshift engaged Waveslash.

"I thought only the police could arrest people." Stormcloud kicked Euphony away and turned to Razorshift.

"What did you expect? She's a cop." Waveslash growled as she locked swords with Razorshift. Since Razorshift's sword was heavier, it threatened to cleave through Waveslash's defense.

"You never told me you were a cop!" Stormcloud would have said more, but Euphony tackled her from behind. Stormcloud whacked the Decepticon in the face with the flat of her halberd. Euphony responded by sending a kick into Stormcloud's stomach.

"Nice job putting your foot into your mouth." Razorshift grumbled. Waveslash used the chance to slam her elbow into Razorshift's face.

Ultra Magnus stared into the face of the horse cassette. The equestrian's eyes were glowing with a freakish light. Slowly, it took a step forward.

"My name is Horsepower, and my robot mode is a mythical unicorn called a Po. This form renders me invulnerable to fire, so I like to play with it!" Horsepower took in a deep breath and began spraying fire. "Time to burn stuff!"

Ultra Magnus took one look at the pyromaniac horse and ran for dear life. Horsepower proceeded to chase him around, blowing fire the whole time. It formed a ring of fire around the rest of the struggling combatants, who were less than pleased. Blackout, in particular, began to run around, screaming like a banshee when she was set on fire. Thankfully, Double-header doused all of the burning objects with flame retardant foam before the flames could spread.

Oceancruiser slammed her fist into Tangletwist's stomach for the tenth time in a row. The Decepticon cadet was obviously no match for her martial arts skills. So far, Oceancruiser was only minimally scratched while her enemy was dented in places that would even make a robot wince.

"Let go of me, you little glitch." Tangletwist kicked Oceancruiser in the face. When the Autobot cadet went stumbling back, Tangletwist tried to pursue the advantage by firing one of her missile launchers, Oceancruiser easily back-flipped over the projectile and charged at Tangletwist with her highest speed. Tangletwist pulled her biggest missile launcher and fired, resulting in a direct hit. When Oceancruiser realized she could not dodge the missile, she halted and attempted to block with her sword; but she was thrown through several trees by the impact.

When the dust cleared, Oceancruiser staggered up. There were several chunks of paint missing and dents all over her limbs. A fuel line in her forehead had ruptured, causing mech fluid to trickle down her face and into her optics. She was half buried in a pile of splintered wood.

"What are you looking at?" Oceancruiser snarled when she saw Tangletwist's haughty expression. "I've still got my sword. I can still…" Oceancruiser halted her words as she glanced down at the shards of metal that had been her sword. In using it against the missile, it had been blown to pieces, some of which were now lodging with Oceancruiser's hand.

"What's the matter? I thought you were some though of warrior." Tangletwist scoffed. "You're pathetic."

"No, you are." Oceancruiser clutched her broken sword. "I don't even need a complete sword to defeat you."

"Show me everything you've got." When Oceancruiser charged at her, Tangletwist grabbed the splintered sword with two of her fingers. "This is nothing to me now. I'm stronger and better than you in every aspect, and now I'll prove it." With one twirl of her arm, she wrested the sword from the hands of its owner and threw it aside.

"The only thing you're better than me at is losing and brownnosing." Oceancruiser jabbed her fingers into two spots on Tangletwist's right arm. "Try to use this now."

"What did you do?" Tangletwist's arm fell to her side, limp as dough. "My arm won't move."

"It's a crysofracture point. By putting pressure there, I activated all of your circuit breakers to seal off electric currents to your arm." Oceancruiser noticed Tangletwist's confused expression. "I don't really understand either, but I know it paralyzes people."

"I don't need this arm to beat you." Tangletwist pulled out her missile launchers and fired. "All I need is this."

Maya looked regretfully at the young seeker on the floor. She truly did not desire this result. "I would not have done such a thing without Lord Magmatron's request. I'm sorry."

"I expected that." Nightscream's hand suddenly latched onto Maya's tail. "Who else would send his minions to attack cadets?"

"Please let go. Struggling will not make this any easier for you." Maya tried to tug her tail away, but Nightscream Just held on tighter

"Tell Magmatron this: you're taking me to him over my cold, lifeless, deactivated body!"

"I don't want to do this, but you have forced my hand." Maya raised her claws. "You were brave, Nightscream."

A screech alerted Euphony to Maya's progress. "Waveslash, let's go. Maya's accomplished our objective."

"Do I have to?" Waveslash whined. "I wanted to fight just a little while longer."

"Yes, we must go. Our objective has been reached, and it would be unwise to tarry. Diskcons, please return to me." Euphony called to her creations. All of the cassettes complied with the exception of the jaguar, which dropped Nightscream into the arms of her creator before returning.

"Let go of Nightscream." Ultra Magnus attempted to stop the Decepticons, but was knocked back by a combined kick from Waveslash and Euphony. When he got up again, Euphony shot him with her taser, knocking him out.

"Decepticons, retreat." Euphony ordered, leading the Decepticons out, with Stormcloud following.

Oceancruiser and Tangletwist, still fighting outside, noticed the retreating Decepticons. Before Oceancruiser could react, Tangletwist joined her fellow Decepticons in the air. Oceancruiser tried to follow, but her rockets were too badly damaged, and she ended up landing head-first.

"Get back here, you yeller-bellied cowards!" Stormcloud threw her halberd, which missed Euphony's head by inches. It earned Stormcloud a missile to the gut.

"Damn it…Damn it…" Oceancruiser whispered as she saw the Decepticons get further and further, her little brother in tow. "Damn it all!" She screamed to the now raining sky.

"That was an excellent job, Euphony." Magmatron complimented her. "The rest of you take note—this is how you succeed in your mission."

"Thank you, Lord Magmatron. I do not deserve this praise." Euphony bowed.

"Wildclench, show Nightscream back to his quarters. Euphony, relieve him a 1300 hours." Magmatron ordered.

"Yes, Lord Magmatron."

Oceancruiser sat on her bed, unmoving. She had gone back to her room wordlessly when Ultra Magnus ordered the cadets come back to the cabins; she had sat there ever since. Windshear wrapped her arms around her best friend. When suppertime came, Oceancruiser refused to leave her cabin, so Windshear brought her the energon.

"Oceancruiser, I understand you're upset, but you need to eat." When Oceancruiser refused to respond, Windshear pulled out Oceancruiser's alternative fuel port in her side and attached the energon. "Oceancruiser, you need your strength to get Nightscream back."

Oceancruiser slowly pointed to the energon and shook her head. "I'm defeated. I've failed" She whispered so softly that her words were barely audible. "Tangletwist should have finished me off."

"Oceancruiser, this isn't you. You're never depressed. You stare at depressed people and make fun of them; you don't get depressed. Where did your energy go?" Windshear grabbed Oceancruiser and shook her. "You went to the amusement park when I was home with a fever and enjoyed your self, although it was my party. You didn't feel guilty then, so don't feel guilty now! We'll thrash those Decepticons and get Nightscream back no matter what it takes!"

"Can I help?" Oceancruiser whispered again.

"Help with what."

"Help you guys blow those Decepticons back to Cybertron." Oceancruiser was visibly grinning. "They'll regret the day they messed with us!"

"Of course you can help. Nightscream is your brother." When Oceancruiser heard Windshear's words, she smiled and snuggled into Windshear's chest. In no time, she was fast asleep. Windshear gently laid her friend on the recharger bed and hopped on her own two bunks away.

"Aren't you going to wish me good night?" Oceancruiser turned on an optic.

"Good night, sleep tight; don't let the bug-shaped nanobots bite. Now go to sleep." Windshear muttered. Oceancruiser nodded and drifted back to sleep.


	12. Rescue

Oceancruiser grinned as she put the final props into place. This time, she was going to get her brother back even if she had to cause maximum damage. She yelped when someone opened the door behind her.

"Traitor, what are you doing?" Blackout stood behind Oceancruiser, gun cocked. "Turn around slowly."

"Oceancruiser grinned nervously. "This may sound weird, but I need your help."

"What kind of help?"

"I need help to sneak inside the Decepticon base." This comment made Blackout clutch her gun even tighter. Oceancruiser just scratched the back of her head. "That came out wrong. I just wanted you to hack into the Decepticon base's computer and shut off the security while I sneak inside there and rescue Nightscream."

"You better not be trying anything."

"If I wanted to try anything, would I need to tell you first?"

"You have a point." Blackout lowered her weapon. "However, when I am inside the system, I will be able to see your every move. Don't try anything funny."

"I won't." Oceancruiser gave Blackout a wide smile. "Now, help me with this suit."

"Are you sure this is a good idea." Razorshift stared intently at Stormcloud.

"I'm positive. Besides, you're the one who wants to catch them."

"That may be the case, but we will be within enemy territory."

"You're supposed to be an undercover cop."

"That is no good when everyone knows who I am." Razorshift lay back on her recharger bed. "If I ever see Waveslash again, I am decking her one across the jaw before clapping cuffs on her."

"You'll cuff her before you cuff her. Nice joke." Stormcloud stowed the last of her equipment in her subspace pocket. "We can't let those yeller-bellied, skunk-blooded square-suckers get away with kidnapping a cadet."

"I think we might have found common ground after all."

"You mean other than the fact that we both age gracefully."

"Don't remind me. My coworkers already give me enough slag about how I'm 'the prettiest thing that goes their way'."

"Maybe it's because of your pink paintjob. You should get repainted."

"I have no time."

"Just go for a quick visit and get painted a less feminine color, like blue or something."

"I will go for a bodyshop that repaints you waste brown with rust accents."

"That won't look good on you. In fact, that won't look good on anyone."

"That is the point. I do not want to be attractive"

Wildclench was stocking some shelves when he heard the doorbell ring. Being the closest Decepticon to the door, he ran to greet the visitor. In front of him stood a short somewhat stocky femme with a red optic visor and a few layers of foil over her mouth. She was a bit flat around the chest area, making her look childish. In addition, there were pizza logos decorating her body. Her alternate form was obviously a ship, but Wildclench was too stupid to notice.

"Did someone order a pizza?" The girl's voice was extremely high-pitched, like she was trying to disguise her accent. In her hands, she held a square, metal box.

"Sorry, but you've got the wrong address." Wildclench turned to go, but the girl grabbed him.

"No, I checked, you ordered the pizza."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"I didn't order no pizza."

"Maybe one of your friends did."

"Only Lord Magmatron has access to the main computer, and he'd never do something so petty."

"Maybe someone else would."

"Nonsense, no one else would consider doing such a trivial thing either."

"Look, you ordered a pizza and I delivered it. Now, eat it while it's hot!" The pizza delivery girl opened the box and smashed the rotten energon pizza in Wildclench's face.

"Who turned out all the lights?" Wildclench stumbled around confusedly, his senses muffled by the layer of rotten pizza, reeking of contamination and garbage.

"Here's your drink. I hope you like punch!" The pizza delivery girl slammed her fist into Wildclench's stomach, knocking him out. She then proceeded to walk over his body and into the base.

Blackout tapped on the computer keys. It took a thief to catch a thief, just as it took a security officer to crack security codes. Despite their ragtag members, the renegade Decepticons had an excellent security program. Right now, Blackout found herself stuck on trying to break down a firewall, which was frustrating and interesting at the same time.

"Access denied." The sound of the computer voice made Blackout slam her had on the keyboard in aggravation. Ironically, this gave the correct keyword by accident, thus granting her access.

"Playing on the computers again, Blackout?" Double-header peered down. "I don't know much about computers. Do you think you could teach me?"

"Save this for another time."

"I know. You're frustrated about the Decepticons. Ultra Magnus says he has a plan to get Nightscream back, but we need to operate carefully. I hope this works—I'm worried about Nightscream."

"That is why I'm working on the failsafe in case our plan falls short."

"You're always so careful. Anyway, have you seen Oceancruiser?"

"No."

"Where do you think she could be?"

"She's probably training somewhere."

"Thanks for the info." As soon as Double-header strolled off, Blackout went back to her computer. She needed to hack into the system before Oceancruiser got into any real trouble.

"I am not sure this is a good idea." Razorshift muttered. She and Stormcloud were crawling in the Decepticon base's ventilation system. Currently, Razorshift was praying that they would not fall off.

As if to spite Razorshift, the ventilation gave a creak and collapsed. Blitzquake, who was walking under the pipes, was the first to notice. Instantly, he whipped out "Old Betsy" and began to spray bullets everywhere.

"You've got nowhere to run now, Autobots!" Blitzquake let out a psychotic cackle.

"We don't plan on running!" Stormcloud spun her halberd around and chopped Blitzquake's weapon in half. Then, she knocked him out with the flat of her halberd.

"Good job, Stormcloud." Razorshift approached the unconscious Decepticon and began to strip off his armor.

"What are you doing?"

"I am acquiring a disguise. That way, even if I am spotted, they will have to at least do a double-take before shooting."

"Are you sure you can fit into the armor? You're a hovercraft and he's a helicopter."

"I've had harder disguises before." Razorshift retorted as she stuffed herself into Blitzquake's armor.

"Like what?"

"I disguised myself as an ambulance once. I do not wish to discuss the experience any more. Please help me paint my arms and legs." Razorshift handed two containers of green paint to Stormcloud, who proceeded to aid Razorshift in concealing her identity.

"Wow, I almost don't recognize you." Stormcloud stepped back to view he handiwork. Gone were Razorshift's spike shoulder pads and hovercraft attachments. She was wearing Blitzquake's breast plate as well as his rear-end situated propellers. Green and silver paint coated her entire body.

"Why the slag would I recognize you? You're just another crummy Autobot." To go with her disguise, Razorshift adopted a gruff, violent manner.

"Hey, you're back." Steelstreak's voice was the first thing that Nightscream heard when he regained consciousness. Looking up, he saw the younger cadet seated on his desk.

"What happened?" Nightscream slowly shook his head. Being unconscious had made him groggy.

"Wildclench came in and dumped you here last night. Magmatron told us to watch you and make sure that you don't run off again."

"I remember now. That weird cat-thing knocked me out."

""I think it's a jaguar. Euphony calls it Maya, but I don't really care."

Nightscream shrugged. "Do you have anything to do around here?"

"You can't go out."

"We could spray-paint the base."

"Salvager drank all of our paint last week."

"That is wrong on so many levels."

"I know. Magmatron made him go get his fuel cells pumped."

"We could try to cook something, since graffiti is out of the question."

"I can't cook to save my life."

"Me neither."

"I know! Let's go photocopy our skid plates on Squid-head's printer."

"Great idea; maybe I'll send a copy to Sunburst."

"You wouldn't dare."

Waveslash paused for a second at the helicopter that walked away from her. There was something familiar, but the assassin couldn't put her finger on it.

"Hey, Razorshift, wait for me." Stormcloud called, running up beside her partner. Razorshift just slapped her forehead in frustration.

"Hold it right there! I know I recognized you!" Waveslash pulled out her two blades. "Prepare to die."

"Not if I can help it." Before Waveslash could launch an attack, Stormcloud had started slash at the assassin with her halberd. Waveslash dodged the attack from the blade portion, only to be stabbed in the leg with the spear portion. As she turned around, Razorshift punched her in the jaw.

"That one is for blowing my cover." Razorshift hissed.

"Nice job." Stormcloud muttered.

"It was a job that did not need doing until you pulled such a foolish maneuver." Razorshift snapped. Stormcloud's only reply was a nervous smile.

Euphony peeped inside another room. For some reason, she could not locate Steelstreak and Nightscream.

"Let's do it in color this time!" Nightscream's excited exclamation prompted Euphony to look inside Laserwing's room. What greeted her was a mess of paper, all imprinted with a picture of either Nightscream or Steelstreak's skid plate.

"Boys, don't you think you should stop now? This is making a mess, and it'll make Laserwing livid."

"That's the point." Nightscream grinned. "We want to piss off old Squid-head. The look on his face will be just priceless."

"Better yet, let's tape this stuff up on the wall, so it'll greet him the moment her enters!" Steelstreak was also currently releasing his naughty impulses.

Euphony slowly shook her head. "Why don't we do something not only cleaner, but more productive?"

"Like what?"

"Like playing cards. I could teach you how to play Go Fish."

"Then what are we waiting for?"

Oceancruiser angrily kicked another door down. After Blackout had hacked into the system, she disabled the alarms for thirty minutes. This meant thirty minutes for Oceancruiser to find her brother and cause whatever destruction she desired while searching for him—provided that she encountered no Decepticons. Therefore, she had kicked down every door and ransacked every room behind the doors for Nightscream. However, she had currently made no progress, which was frustrating to say the least.

"Do you have any threes?"

"Go Fish."

The noises from behind a door attracted Oceancruiser's attention. After pressing her audio against the entrance to verify the voice as her brother, Oceancruiser promptly gave the door the same treatment that befell all others of its breed. Her kick sent it collapsing onto Euphony's head, knocking out the older femme.

"Hi sis, I'm okay." Nightscream was sitting on the ground cross-legged, holding a hand of playing cards. Steelstreak sat next to him, glancing at Oceancruiser in open-mouthed shock.

"Dude, is that your sister?" Steelstreak finally managed to gasp out after a few seconds.

"Steelstreak, meet my older sister, Oceancruiser. Oceancruiser, meet Steelstreak. You don't need to knock him out, sis—he's a nice guy." Nightscream introduced his friends to each other. Now all he could do was hope that his sister listened.

"Come on, Nightscream, I'm busting you out." Oceancruiser grabbed her little brother.

"Your sister is awesome." Steelstreak muttered.

"You already have Sunburst." Nightscream glared at Steelstreak.

"I reserve the right to gawk at other cute females."

"Just for your information, my sister is the flattest out of any of her friends."

"You are so lucky."

"Hold it right there." Laserwing inched up to Razorshift and Srtormcloud, backing the two up against a wall.

"What do you want us to hold—your neck?" Stormcloud growled as she tightened her grip on her halberd.

"Out of my way!" Oceancruiser charged over Laserwing's head, knocking the strategist into the ground.

"What are you doing here?" Stormcloud yelled in shock.

"What are **you** doing here? I came to rescue my brother." Oceancruiser snapped back.

"I told you our presence was not required." Razorshift hissed at her partner.

"Don't think you can ignore me." Laserwing got up, holding his gun. "I'll shoot the first one that moves."

"I don't think so, pencil-brain." Stormcloud barreled forward and sliced Laserwing's gun in half. Then, she threw an electric shock into him, knocking him unconscious. "Let's get out of here."

"My sentiments exactly." Razorshift muttered.

"Wait…I'm still here…" Laserwing groaned, climbing to his feet. Oceancruiser threw him into the wall with one spinning kick.

Steelstreak sighed as he mulled his options over in his head. On one hand, he could chase after his escaped friend, but Oceancruiser would maul him. Onbe the other hand, he could just ignore the whole thing, but Magmatron would maul him. Either way, he was going to be mauled so badly that even his creator wouldn't recognize him. All of these fatalistic thoughts, along with all the rest of his thoughts that still remained in his mind, vanished when he turned the corner and ran face-first into the fullest set of cleavage he had ever seen, or, to be more accurate, touched.

"Excuse me, but I'm looking for my boyfriend. Do you have any idea about where he might be?" Double-header asked politely.

"I d-don't remember anyone having a g-girlfriend." Steelstreak stuttered slightly.

"I'm Nightscream's girlfriend."

"He is one lucky son of a gun." Steelstreak muttered.

"Could you help me find him?"

"Of course I can."

"I'm surrounded by idiots." Magmatron muttered as he stared at his men. Wildclench was covered from head to toe with rotten energon pizza. Blitzquake was half-naked. Waveslash was limping because of a leg wound. Laserwing looked as if he had been flying through a thunderstorm; even his pink dress looked singed. To exacerbate matters, Euphony and Salvager did not even come.

"We struggled valiantly, but the Autobots overwhelmed us by their sheer numbers." Laserwing protested. Magmatron grabbed him by the throat and held him in the air.

"Not only do you fail to stop Autobots from invading the base, but you also come to fight off the invaders looking like this? Your value has just decreased exponentially." Magmatron threw Laserwing to the side with a disgusted grunt.

"You can't even get your men to look like soldiers!" Fastlane fell to the ground, rolling in laughter.

"Looks aren't everything, boy." Waveslash dashed over and grabbed Fastlane, slashing a cut into his face and lapping up his blood. "Tactic and power are what separates the strong from food. Now, everyone put down your weapons unless you want this boy's head to explode."

"What are you waiting for? Shoot at me; shoot through me! I don't want to be her hostage!" For his act of defiance, Fastlane was knocked out by Waveslash.

"The only one to be putting down weapons is you." Stormcloud charged out of the base, downing Waveslash in a burst of lightning. Razorshift followed behind, back in her original armor.

"Are you sure it's this way?" Oceancruiser and Nightscream were wondering around the Decepticon base with no idea as to where they were going. So far, all of Nightscream's directions had proven incorrect, so the two had walked into another dead end.

"Sorry about this, but it seems we're lost." Nightscream muttered.

"Quiet. Someone's coming." Oceancruiser quickly dragged her brother into the nearest room to wait while the footsteps passed.

"That's funny. I thought I heard Nightscream just a second ago." Double-header peered around. Steelstreak shrugged and turned to go down another corridor.

"Reach for the sky, varmints." Salvager stood behind the two cadets, holding a gun.

"I'm just showing her around. She's Nightscream's girlfriend." Steelstreak pointed at Double-header.

"What going on?" Euphony walked in, rubbing her head.

"I am about to execute these pretenders to the throne!" Salvager declared.

"Keep an eye on them. I will go aid Lord Magmatron." Euphony hurried away.

"Just keep real still-like, you pests." Salvager kept his gun on the two cadets.

"I'm going to try and get his gun. When I do that, you run away as fast as you can." Steeelstreak hissed.

"I'm not the type of person who would abandon their friends."

"First, I'm not your friend—only an acquaintance. Second, this is not your choice to make, so get away while you still have the chance." Steelstreak rebutted. Then, without warning, he charged at Salvager and grasped at his gun. The two struggled for a while before a single shot went off. Steelstreak gasped and touched his chest. When he lifted his hand again, it was covered in mech fluid. The young cadet stumbled back afew steps and then collapsed.

"Don't frag with me." Salvager muttered, giving Steelstreak a light kick.

"You monster!" Double-header jumped up and delivered a punch to Salvager's face that sent him flying out of the base, leaving a huge hole in the roof.

"Sis, we need to get out. I think someone might have been shot." Nightscream yanked the door open to see what had happened.

"Nightscream, I'm so glad to see you!" Double-header grabbed her boyfriend in a bone-cracking hug. "Go get help! This kid's been shot."

"Nightscream, you and Double-header find Cobalt. I'll treat this kid's wound." Oceancruiser ordered.

"Are you sure you can handle it?" Nightscream asked his sister, who was already kneeling by Steelstreak.

"Stop underestimating me. I'm a warrior and I've encountered some similar situations, so while I might not know how to take temperatures, I can at least perform some emergency procedures."

Nightscream nodded and grabbed Double-header. "Come on, Dub, we can't do much here."

Ultra Magnus planted his fist into Wildclench's face. The Decepticon reeled back, falling onto Tirebiter. Instantly, he began to jump around in pain, since having a spiky snail stuck in one's skid plate was not a comfortable feeling.

"Ultra Magnus, our rescue mission is a success!" Double-header and Nightscream rushed out, waving.

"Your progress was extremely low. Any slower and you would have been destroyed by the enemy." Ultra Magnus admonished the two cadets even as his back was turned.

"Nothing is ever good enough for you." Double-header pouted.

Oceancruiser's optics widened as she viewed the skirmish between the Autobots and the Decepticons. "You guys are having a free-for-all and you didn't invite me? I want to join and have some fun."

"Did you come back to get slagged again?" Tangletwist called out mockingly. Oceancruiser responded by slamming a flying kick into her face. Less than a second later, the two cadets were every bit as immersed in the brawl as the others.

"I expected this from Oceancruiser and even Blackout, but your conduct was both surprising and disappointing." Ultra Magnus glared at Razorshift and Stormcloud, who were silently standing before him.

"It was her idea." Razorshift muttered. However, the look that Magnus shot at her indicated that he was not in the mood for excuses.

"I'm sorry, but I just wanted to help." Stormcloud whispered.

"I thought that you knew better by now." Ultra Magnus muttered. "Not only could you have damaged yourself, but you could have caused damage to others as well."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to help." Stormcloud whimpered. This made her feel like a trainee receiving a reprimand from her instructor. Despite having matured beyond her belligerent former persona, she still had problems standing aside during a fight. This caused problems whenever she was given an order that kept her from the battlefield.

"This mission was a success, so all of this was justified. That is the most important thing." Razorshift stated.

Ultra Magnus groaned and slapped his forehead. "The mission is considered a success if al of us return safely."

"I know. We rescued Nightscream and returned with as few casualties as possible. Sometimes, not following the procedures is the best choice." Razorshift countered.

"Nevertheless, you deliberately disobeyed my orders to stay behind and watch the base." Ultra Magnus turned and stared at the two. "I will decide your punishment, after I deal with the eavesdroppers."

Oceancruiser and Blackout sheepishly stepped out from behind the door. "How did you know we were here?"

"Razorshift told me before this lecture began. You managed to save Nightscream and weaken the Decepticons, but don't try this ever again." Ultra Magnus walked back to his desk. "Both of you are dismissed."

"Hey, what's your problem?" Oceancruiser jumped at Magnus. "At these times, you're supposed to say 'you were such an idiot; go scrub the toilets as punishment.'"

"Do you desire to be punished?" Ultra Magnus asked rhetorically.

"Of course I do! I'm the one who caused all this. Stormcloud and Razorshift were just helping me, so this isn't their fault. Come on; make me scrub toilets for planning this!" Oceancruiser yelled.

"You have energon-stocking duties for the next week. Everyone else should leave before I decide to give everyone the same punishment." Ultra Magnus decided.

"Okay, sir, I'll get on it right away!" Oceancruiser dashed out the door, followed by the three other femmes.

Ultra Magnus sighted and laid his head down on his desk. If he cold survive the next month with his sanity intact, then it would be a miracle.


End file.
